This epic is a deep-dive, fluid, real conversation with one of my best friends Rosie Acosta just about everything happening right now. We speak about feeling the overwhelm from the array of perspectives out there, the Social Dilemma documentary, pro’s and con’s about fact-checking vs censorship, conspiracy theory rabbit holes, feeling like you don’t know who to believe.. And how to come back to your breath + body to find balance within it all. I put this conversation out because I know so many of us feel confused and overwhelmed with everything happening in the media and wanted to show you that you aren’t alone and let you hear two other sisters voice their ideas, concerns and musings throughout this unusual time. Practice yoga nidra + yoga with Rosie Acosta at radicallyloved.com and connect with her @rosieacosta
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Episode 320: The Social Dilemma + Finding Balance In The Craziness with Rosie Acosta
By Sahara Rose
Namaste. It’s Sahara Rose and welcome back to The Highest Self Podcast, a place where we discuss what makes You, Your Soul’s Highest Evolvement.
If it’s your first time listening, this Episode is going to be very different than my other ones because it’s just a deep dive conversation with one of my best friends about just everything happening in the world.
We’re going through a time of a lot of chaos, whether you’re on a spiritual journey or not, we are all feeling it. And this year has really been unlike any other, with the series of events that our souls in some way chose to experience, though challenging, and confronting, and often painful; and this year ain’t over! And it can feel like things are just getting more chaotic.
So, in this Episode, I wanted to discuss, just friend to friend, the types of conversations that I’m having with my community about navigating what information and documentaries, and all of these things that we are seeing in the world; and how to find balance amidst all of this craziness.
And I think it’s fine to admit that we all feel overwhelmed. I, myself, do as well, and I think that’s why it’s more important than ever that we can speak about whatever it is that we’re feeling. In my last Solocast (two Solocasts ago) I spoke about why it’s so important to actually speak about the fears and the uncertainties that you’re experiencing rather than just bypass over them, because it’s only through going into those fears that we’re able to see whether there is a potential or unmet need underneath it, and bring about healing.
So, though it may seem easier to kind of pretend that the world around us isn’t happening, the truth is, it is, and the only way we’re going to find peace through it is to have these conversations and feel like we’ve been able to explore different concerns that we may have; different belief systems that we may have been shown or told; and finding our own way through it.
So, this is a conversation; it’s not here to really tell you what to think; it’s just us looking at, for example ‘The Social Dilemma’ – being a big documentary that came out about social media and the algorithm; and how a lot of these social media companies are kind of selling our information to other people; big brands; to share ads with us.
And also, what’s on the other side of that. Going back to just having six channels on mainstream media; and all of the different theories that we hear; and how sometimes going into some of the theories can actually bring us to an even more fear-based state. But the other side of that is to not question the world that we’re told we live in.
So, nothing is one-sided, everything has dualistic views, and that’s what I shared in my last Solocast as well, that things just aren’t so black and white. So this conversation is really an exploration about the different viewpoints and conversations that people are having right now; and then despite it all, how to find balance; how to find sovereignty; and how to find peace.
So we explore all the things and at the end of the Episode Rosie shares with us her Yoga Nidra practice – a quiz that she’s creating to help you find the right Yoga Nidra practice for your sleep archetype; and jut to allow yourself (I hope with this Episode) to go down those hesitations; those fears; those concerns that you have; but then also come back to your breath; come back to your body, because at the end of the day, we’re never going to figure it all out.
And we’d have these conversations to explore these different avenues, but it’s not to find the answer underneath it all because the truth is it’s still unveiling, we don’t know where all this is going to take us, but we can trust that if we continue to have the difficult conversations and align with our truth, and have them with compassion, and love, and anchor into your own soul’s frequency before giving up our sovereignty to the world around us, then we could trust that we’ll always navigate this path in our highest alignment.
So, sit back and enjoy! This is a very authentic and real conversation, completely unscripted and we definitely talk about things that I think most people are a little bit afraid to explore, especially on a public platform like a podcast. And I’ve decided to put this out there because I know that so many people listening to this Podcast don’t have friends that they get to have these conversations with, and feel really alone going through these experiences.
So, I don’t know if y’all want to cancel me for even just questioning; there’s nothing I can do about that, but I’d rather put myself out there and help other people who are going through these uncertainties and let them know that it’s okay to not have the answer; it’s okay to feel overwhelmed; and it’s okay to just want to go back to your yoga mat sometimes; and sometimes that’s really what we really need.
So, without further ado, let’s welcome one of my best friends, Yoga Teacher, Yoga Nidra expert; Tantrica; and such an incredible Queen – Rosie Acosta – to The Highest Self Podcast
And before we get started, I have an announcement for you.
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So, if you’re calling in a deeper approach to spirituality that invites your whole feminine self, then come join us. You can find the link in the show notes – rosegoldgoddesses.com/ixchel – you’re can purchase this one circle on its own or it’s included as part of your membership in Rose Gold Goddesses, including all of the other Goddesses that we have worked with – from Saraswati to Quan Yin, to Kali Ma, to Durga, and everyone in between; as well as my E-Courses, Master Classes, Expert-guest workshops, member-led workshops; and did I mention a community of 2000+ Spiritual Soul Sisters? Yes! That is all available for you in Rose Gold Goddesses! You can find that link in the show notes and I’m super-excited to invite you inside.
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Welcome Rosie to The Highest Self Podcast, it’s so great to have you back!
Thank you so much for having me on! I actually can’t remember when I was on.
Three years ago, so much has changed! And we’re still friends.
So the first question I’s love to ask you is what makes you your highest self?
Right now I think it changes, and I think right now it’s my friends. I think I have been so fortunate during this time, this year that we’ve been able to see each other; to hang out; and I think that that is where I can tune into that frequency where I feel like my highest self. I feel recharged, and energized, and inspired, and joyful.
It has been everything! I think it’s so important for, especially women, to have a friend, a group of friends that they can talk to about everything that’s happening this year. Because it feels like every single day all of these different topics, whether they’re societal, political, on the news, on the conspiracy theory web, so many places, we’re getting so much information right now and it’s really hard, first of all, to decipher what’s happening, but then to also tune in to how you’re feeling about it; what it’s bringing up for you; and then also having goals throughout it all, it feels like – there’s this meme I saw and it was this dog working on his computer, and it’s like hitting your deadlines in 2020 and there’s fire outside and you’re on your laptop. And in a way it feels like “Okay, let me focus on my work even though it might feel like things are just so chaotic outside” and it’s been so just life-changing having our little texts thread and being able to send each other 15-minute long voice notes like “What are you moving through?” That’s why I’m so excited to have you on the Podcast today to have just a girl’s chat. We’ve been talking all day today about all of the things. Podcast listeners, a lot of them don’t have friends they get to talk to about this stuff; they’re watching documentaries and getting information, and they want to hear people’s opinions and perspectives because it helps us realize our own.
And you are someone who has helped me get so much clarity because I went down the rabbit hole y’all; I went down that hole! There was no Alice in Wonderland o the other end, quite the opposite, not fun!
And I remember I was texting you and Allison and I was like “Do you guys know about the deep state?” And you were like “Just notice how you are breathing” and you kind of coached me to connect back to my body. And I know so many listeners have gone down these different documentaries and things that have popped up in 2020 who claim to be telling the truth. And this long-standing fear and anxiety that is still in our physical bodies because we haven’t done the light purification of it.
So, if someone is or has gone through a conspiracy theory, rabbit holes, are extremely scared right now, what can they do?
What I would say is, I would say the same I said to you when we were on the phone, is to breathe; to do a little of pranayama to return back to their body; to do some, one – breathing – so I would inhale for one, exhale for two or inhale for two, exhale for four, or inhale for three, exhale for six. Inhaling and exhaling through your nose can be extremely grounding, and I feel like, for me anyway, anytime I’ve got into an anxiety, or manic, fanatic energy space, I realize that I’m not breathing, and all of that energy is moving up into your brain; all of that blood is rushing into your mind, and it’s really just creating more of what it’s creating what your body is feeling, and I don’t know about you, but I’ve never made any good decisions when I’m in a state of panic. So I think that it’s really important for people to learn how to connect with their body; to learn how to identify what that panic or anxiousness, or helplessness, or fear looks like for them and their body in their own state. And I think so much of what’s happening is, we’re being fed information, and everybody that’s listening to this and all of us, we’re all truth-seekers, right? So, everybody’s wanting to know what the truth is; and in a time and in a place where so much of the truth has been curated and fucked with. It makes it really hard for us to discern what is truth.
Even the word ‘Truth’ has been turned into a subjective term.
Yeah, a hundred percent! And look, in a way, we’re all different, right? It’s bio-individuality; every single person is different; and beliefs are different; religions are different; and all that is part of what makes this human experience so unique, is we get to learn different things. But at the end of the day we have to really ground ourselves in what is true for us; what is the truest; what is the realist (I don’t want to sound like a hip hop song) but what is the truest and most real for you?
When we think about something like love – you love your partner, or you love a sibling, or a parent, or both your parents – there’s no questioning that love, you just know; you just know that you love them. Your pets; I don’t ever question my love for my people, I just know it true, I know it’s there, and hopefully they do as well. When I feel joy, I feel ecstatic, I don’t question the joy, I just experience it.
When we experience states like fear and anxiety, we’re not questioning them either; we’re experiencing them because we haven’t trained ourselves how to come back to a state of security. We feel fear because we don’t know; there’s no knowing, so anxiety is coming from not knowing something for sure and uncertainty. And there’s a lot of uncertainty in the world, and when we anchor in that uncertainty, it creates for a very terrible existence, especially during a time we’re in now. When you’re uncertain it’s hard to come back down, so to speak. The only certainty that we can create for ourselves is our own truth; is our own body. And it could be as small as putting your hand on the ground underneath you, or going outside and getting a breath of fresh air, going to the beach, or putting your feet in sand, or going out and hugging a tree, or doing something where you can reconnect to your own humanness.
So yeah, look, I have a lot of opinions and I have a lot of my own assessment of what is happening in the world, but I think that we are in a place where we need to pay attention. And I don’t want that to sound like alarmist, I think we need to just pay attention. I think there’s so much alarmness shit going on right now anyway where it’s like “We need to wake up! We need to do it right now! Everybody sign this petition. Stop!” and it’s just like “Oh my Goodness!” I understand we need to mobilize; we need to change things, but we also need to take care of ourselves.
Absolutely, yes! And I think that what’s hard with the uncertainty is there can be groups that take advantage of that; there can be groups that take advantage of people are not sure who to vote for right now; people are not sure who to trust. So, let’s take something that resonates as true and then tie it into something that is of benefit to our agenda. I don’t mind getting specific about certain things right now. A lot of people are questioning vaccines – that’s a very popular topic, we’re not here to talk about what your choice is on that, but a lot of people are questioning vaccines. So, from that area it will attach it to something else “Well, if you’re questioning vaccines, let’s question the greater Government” and then from there “Who’s behind it?” and it leads from one thing to the next. And in that web of things, there can be different agendas, different parties, different things that are thrown in the bucket with that. And because you’re in this “Aha; nod; nod; take in; take in. I believed you up to here. I don’t really know about this part, but because I’ve believed you up to here, I might as well say to this next part too because who am I; I’ve been blinded my whole life if they haven’t let me know the truth!” So, they’re in a way, and I think that’s why so much of the spiritual and conscious community has moved into this way is because they do take ounces of truth and then tie on these mistruths. And because you’re in such an anxious and fearful state, you’re just willing to believe anything that will make you feel certain at that time.
Yeah! And the reason why the wellness community is so prime for the taking is because none of us come to the wellness community because we’re well.
We all crazy!
We all come to the wellness community is because we are seeking something. And so, for a lot of people (God, I mean, it’s, how deep do I want to get?). I never talk about this in public. I have my own opinions, and people who obviously follow me know how I feel about certain things, but one of the most powerful things that we can do is have our own opinion. And we acquire our own opinion by doing homework and by truly assessing. What’s not happening in that is our own connection to our own response to it. Okay, let’s say I’m doing research, I’m going down the YouTube rabbit hole, and I’m doing my research. I’m old-school; I come from a place where I used to do research paper in the library; and I used to pull an index card and I would write my resources down, and I had to read a book, or read a handful of books, I had to look up articles and I had to really do some work. It wasn’t as easy as watching a YouTube video of Cliffnotes.
I remember we weren’t even allowed to use the internet as a source.
Yeah, you couldn’t. It was debatable, it’s like “Oh, you might be able to; Oh I don’t know! Some teachers were ok with it, some weren’t” But what that helped me learn is – truth feels different, and just because something sounds good, it doesn’t mean it’s true. Just because something sounds like it could be true, doesn’t mean it’s true.
And here’s the thing. I don’t think the majority of people are sitting around like “Hey, how do we lie to people because we’re just fucked up?!” or even like “We just want to get a bunch of clicks!”
I actually don’t think that’s the majority; I think that people, genuinely, with the information that they’ve been handed think they’re making the best choice. And because they feel passionate about this, they’re going out there, they’re creating content and sharing. And that’s what social media creates – it’s these echo chambers. So if you’re in one echo chamber, you’re going to keep getting more articles, more interviews, more information to claim that exact same finding. Whereas if I’m in a totally different one, we’re coming from completely different worlds so you would look at me and be like “Oh my God, you’re so crazy, where did you get that from?” and I’m like “No, you’re so crazy, where did you get that from?” It’s because we’re both finding all of the “sources” to match whatever echo chamber we’re in.
Exactly! One hundred percent! And I think you said something so key, is the fight between “I’m right – I’m right” and that’s where we get lost. You can’t convince somebody else to change their belief system.
And in fact I would say that that’s the definition of entitlement.
A hundred percent! And that’s where there is no growing, there’s nothing. You can’t go from a place of “I need you to believe what I believe, I’m going to try and convince you, I have a good argument.” And it’s like people can debate and argue all day long but at the end of the day if we can’t accept the fact that other people have different values and beliefs than we do, we’re never going to move through this, ever.
Yeah, and a lot of people are struggling with their friends being super politically different right now; family members being super different. I think with family members it’s almost that’s always been the case so it’s a little bit more, but I’m seeing a lot of friendships like we might be vibe and completely and we’re choosing friends and then suddenly you end up on one echo chamber and I’m in another so we’re seeing the whole world, the election, everything, in these two totally different ways. And it’s super important to not lose friendships over this because understand why that person came to that conclusion; what the other side wants, but then also be able to tap out of it because again, it’s this illusion, the social media tunnel that makes you think that the entire world is collapsing and if you acquire enough information and spend enough time on social media doing so, then somehow you’re going to be the one to figure out your way through it.
I think for me, my biggest realization was “I’m never going to figure all this out, I need to just focus on living my life!”
Yeah! And everybody needs to do that. I think that if we focused on living our lives more, we would stop focusing on how we’re all so different. Look, there’s a lot of things going on right now and I think, just to preface this conversation, we’re talking about the conspiracy theory rabbit hole, we’re talking about politics, we’re talking about these things specifically because obviously it’s a pressing topic at the moment and it’s taken over a lot of people’s conversations. When we stop considering other people’s opinions and positions, we stop our own ability to continue to grow. I think we have to find each other’s humanness and how we can continue to connect, and how we can create a different way of being. Obviously what we’ve been doing isn’t working. Yes, there needs to be change; yes, there needs to be reform; yes, things need to be brought to the forefront, but it’s still very important, it always has been historically. These things have happened historically throughout the ages of time, this is no different. What we can do for ourselves is to anchor in what we know is true, do the things that we need to do in order to keep our sanity and keep our health, and keep our relationships. It’s been such a sad thing to see, a lot of relationships dissolve because of it, and I think it’s unfortunate that people are willing to throw away years and years and years of friendships and relationships because of their position on a specific topic. I found myself in the same position, there’s a friend of mine who, yeah we had different politics, that’s never been the case, that’s never been an issue for us in the past, but there was something specific that happened during the riots where she comes from a family of law enforcement and she just didn’t agree with my positioning of how I felt. And look, I have not been public about how I feel, and I’m still not going to, and I have my own reasons to why I don’t publically like to talk about it. I have family members that are also in law enforcement; I’ve also been on the other side of the law where I was the person getting arrested, so I have a very specific view on that. But this friend was just having an issue with something that I had said on Instagram and she was very hurt by it. And we had a conversation and I said “Look, I have the right to feel how I do, as do you, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t be friends and that the last 15 years of our relationship now ceases to exist because you’re saying that all of a sudden that specific statement, now I’ve changed, now I’m a different person” no, it’s still the same person that showed up for you.
Yeah, she just never heard that opinion of yours.
Yeah, and how is that one thing going to then shatter 15 years of history that we have?
And that’s what whatever you call it, the forces that the whatever. That’s what they want! They want people to stop being friends, to hate each other, to police each other; we can’t give into that duality.
Yeah, I totally agree. And fortunately we were able to have more conversations after that and where it stands now – we’re taking some space, it’s literally like a relationship. We’ve talked about this before, we’re on a little bit of a break until after November, and then we will go back, I’m sure, to our relationship and how it was. But I think it’s really important – most people won’t have that conversation.
Most would just give you the cold shoulder or not tell you.
Yeah, and that’s it. And I think that that is the absolute, most abusive thing that you can do to a person, is to give them the silent treatment.
It’s gas lighting them, questioning “What did I do?” And they don’t even know it could’ve been because of an Instagram post.
Yeah. And I think, somebody asked me a couple of weeks ago what I would say to somebody that I didn’t agree with; what words, in yogic terms, what are your words of wisdom to somebody that’s being totally against what you believe and they believe the opposite. And I said I wouldn’t say anything, I would just listen, I would listen to them. And I think that that’s the biggest thing that’s not happening right now, is that we are not listening to the other side.
I think that we can also get really wrapped up in our own bubble that we forget “Oh there’s somebody else that has a different opinion than mine and I should listen to them” because that’s still giving them the opportunity to express themselves. And if we are in the wellness community, then it’s wellness for all not just wellness for the ones that believe in the same thing I do.
Yes, so look, I have a lot of opinions, obviously. We talked about this, at length, many times, and it’s hard to lose somebody to a conspiracy hole.
Or the other side too.
Or the other side, that’s very righteous, that really believes that these people are quacks or whatever, that’s crazy to believe that…
…anything besides mainstream.
And that’s what I think. I feel like people kind of “wake up” and they start to notice these conspiracies and it’s very the 4D of questioning “Are we in this matrix? Is this real?” And it can get very, very fear-based and chaotic. And then that 5D perspective is “It’s all love” it truly all is, even though it seems like chaos. This person also wants what’s best for the world; her experiences will make her think it’s this way. But again, it’s knowing that everyone, most people, truly do want what’s best for the world, and if you can come at it with compassion rather than “You must be wrong. You’re full of shit!”
I had the same thing with one of our mutual friends during, in June, when I was posting things about the riots etc. and she really didn’t like because she was friends with someone that their store got rioted, so she was very against the riots. And I was saying how it’s more of people are expressing how they feel, it’s the language of the unheard, again, I’m not saying everyone should riot at all, but I’m understanding it, and she was offended. And I could see quickly that this text conversation could turn into a really big fight and a dissolving of our relationship which I really didn’t want so I was like “Call me!” We talked on the phone and it actually made us become closer friends because she was able to see “Oh, because it was online, I felt like you were coming at it with this really militant energy” and I was like “Well I feel like you are coming at me with this really militant energy” because it’s online and there’s no voice, and now her and I are closer than we ever have been because we were able to get through that hump. And it doesn’t mean I’ve changed my views or she’s changed hers, but I think that most people are not courageous enough to have that conversation.
That’s such an important thing actually; it’s such a key thing. It’s to have a dialogue that’s not a post on Facebook or on Instagram because those things never, ever, ever pan out or it’s like you can’t read emotion via text.
The comment wars! Has anyone really ever changed their political views because someone yelled at them on a Facebook comment?
Never! I find it akin to when somebody is calmed down. Tory and I talk about this all the time, it is so triggering for me when somebody tells me to calm down, it does the absolute opposite. So I think we need to learn to use our words differently and to utilize the healing energy of our voice. And listening to somebody’s voice that you love or care about releases oxytocin in your system and it creates a bonding agent, and so when we’re able to have a conversation that creates that connection with somebody else, leaving a voice; our little texts, we’re always leaving a voice note; we’re always connecting, and I think, even if we don’t agree with everything the fact that we’re there – and here’s a really great way to have a conversation with somebody that you love that doesn’t have the same views as you do. You start the conversation by saying “I love you. I will always love you. I am here for you and that nothing and no one will ever change that. But I want to talk to you about something that I’m feeling” or “These things that I’m reading are really affecting me” or “I really believe that more people should know about X or Y or Z.” To open the dialogue in a safe space to really create that container for that person – I mean, think about it for yourself. I’m assuming that the people that are listening to this Podcast are people that are into wellness and spirituality, and are wanting to create a better place – we’re always going to be the ones that have to initiate, and we should never resent that. I think it’s important, for the people that are awake enough to have that conversation and initiate that conversation, start it from a place of love because it’s really difficult to argue with somebody that starts out of the gate telling you how much love you.
Yep, versus someone who’s like – you know, I think people get passive-aggressive when they know that person doesn’t agree with them and they just keep sending them articles.
Yes! Like what Tory does; that’s what he does; I’m like “Don’t do that, that’s so weird.” I had somebody doing that to me, just randomly sending me…
It pisses you off!
I’m like “What?! Do you think I don’t read?” I read the news, I get it. I try not to engage but I know what’s going on in the world, but again, it’s such a…
We need empathy, we need conversation, we need facial expressions, all of the things that come; body language. Online, genuinely is not the space to have these types of conversations.
No, not at all. And that’s where I really miss having a studio or having a place where we could all get together. And now it’s online and I think, thank God for having virtual places.
Zoom, at least you have some video contact.
Yes, exactly, you can have the connection via that way. But just to your point, having empathy and having that connection – I think it also can’t just be empathy, I think it needs to be empathy and compassion because so many people are suffering, and the whole basis of compassion – it’s like empathy without compassion is useless. And I’ve said that before and I had people come after me, and that’s fine, if you want to come after me for saying that, but that’s my belief. I think that if you have empathy alone, in my opinion, it has to be paired with compassion. Because empathy is like “I feel your pain; I feel where you’re coming from; I can truly feel that” but compassion is “I have a desire for your pain to stop. So not only do I feel for you, I feel with you. But I have the genuine desire, from the core of my being for you to not suffer”. And I think if we had more compassion for what’s happening in the world right now, for the people that are part of this system that are just being fed information and they’re not in a good place. Listen, if you’re being fed information that’s making you feel some kind of way, I’m not saying what’s right, what’s wrong, what’s red, what’s blue, I’m saying if you are reading and taking in, consuming information that’s in your body making you feel bad, then you need to stop reading it or engaging with it because you need to be (just going back to what we said at the beginning) – in order for you to discern what is right and what is real for you, you need to be in a good space. Yoga as a whole; the whole purpose of practicing yoga is to cultivate discernment so that I know what to do when I’m not on my mat, because when I’m on my mat, I’m good, I’m moving, I’m doing my serie As, I’m tuning into my highest self, I’m in my blissful state. But it’s coming off of the mat that is really where the yoga comes in. It’s the whole story of the Bhagavad Gita, the journey of the Yogi, it’s what do I do in the real world, how do I take my practice, my meditation practice, my dance practice, my mermaid practice, whatever it may be, how do I take that out into the world and cultivate more of that connection with my fellow human being as opposed to just coming from a place of spurned anger all the time, and disconnection. And you’re different from me so my experience is more valid than yours. That’s not the way. And some people can say that that’s spiritual bypass and whatever, that’s fine and that’s your opinion. I don’t think that that’s true to approach things from a grounded awake space of cultivating discernment because you need to know – discernment just means “I know what is best for me.” So how do you know what’s best for you? How many people do you know or do message you that they say they don’t know what to do?
Yea, so many, every day.
And it’s like “Okay!” I’ve been that person, you’ve been that person, and what do we do when we don’t know something?
I think you ask everyone else and hope they have an answer for you.
Yeah, most of the time you do some investigating, you do some recon, you do some researching. You ask, well I would hope, you ask wise teacher, you ask people that have been there before, you inquire in sacred texts, you watch YouTube videos, hopefully, that are going to inspire you.
While breathing; while noticing how your body feels; kind of noticing if it makes you feel bad. See, and also what I do want to add with the ‘makes you feel bad, don’t watch it’ it’s like you’re not saying disconnect from the news because I don’t think the news has ever, truly made us feel good, it’s just the nature of the world, of Caligula. It’s not 2020, 2019 there was also gun violence and all of these other issues, most people just weren’t listening. I did a Podcast Episode on Gun Violence, it’s my least listened to Episode ever because no one wants to hear that.
You should tag it on this one.
Yeah I’ll tag it “Please listen!” But it’s not to disconnect yourself, it’s when you’re at this point that you feel so beat up and helpless that’s not helping because you can’t be of service anymore. You can only kind of take these things in doses, and for some people that dose might be once a day, for some people it might be every couple weeks. And that’s going to depend on what your Dharma is, how your energy body is, where you are in your spiritual journey, and most importantly what you’re doing with that thing right now. Marianne Williamson needs to know every single day because her Dharma is to be fully in it, in the ring, politically; and she has a very, very strong energy body, she can handle that. Someone who’s going through a divorce right now, who’s dealing with all sorts of things, who doesn’t even know how to find clarity in their own life, and now to take on everything that’s happening in the world, that’s going to be way too much, they need to focus on their own pun first. So, this is where discernment comes back. What can you handle right now and how can you actually be of service in that way? And for some people, they might have kids they’re homeschooling right now, you don’t need to fix the problems of the world. I think that that’s what people need to understand. I think because of social media we think the only way to help people is to be an online activist and it’s not, we’re just only having the exposure to that so we think that’s how we help. We saw so many of these social media activism things that ended up being fraud or performance oriented, or whatever it is. So maybe your greatest form of service is to just sit with your kids while you’re homeschooling them during the day and help them get through their stuff, that could just be more than enough for you.
Yeah, totally agree. Yes, it’s really focusing on what’s going to be the best thing for you in that moment because, I don’t know if I said it, but we were talking about how our brain – technology has evolved, our brain has not, our brain is still the same brain it’s been; our ability to adapt and take information in has evolved somewhat but it’s still a lot for a little person to take in. It’s just so much, so much stuff coming at us constantly, our brain cannot process. There’s been so many scientific studies that have shown that our brain cannot process all of the information we put in it in an hour with all the computer, phone, everything that’s coming in. So, to give ourselves an opportunity to integrate, I think is really key in cultivating more of that discernment and doing practices that are going to help you re-center in that core of who you are, so that when you are going down a rabbit hole, you can recognize “Oh, I’m not breathing.” It’s like the moment I said…
Or “I’m hooked!” I need to watch the next video and the next one, and this is what often times, these not just conspiracies, but the mainstream media does this too, it makes you feel like you don’t know anything. It makes you question all of your beliefs.
Well, let’s be honest, their whole gimmick is to keep you watching, so everything is a hook, everything is a hook, everything on social media is a hook, it’s all a funnel, it’s all a fucking funnel.
You were talking about how you used to watch these conspiracy theory videos way back in the early 2000s or whatever, and you would be two and a half hours in and you’re like “Wait, they still haven’t revealed any truth yet.”
Yeah, it’s like “Oh, here is the truth behind…”
…In the next Episode.
Yeah! I’ve literally been watching this for 2.5 hours and it’s like the dramatic music and the really aesthetically pleasing, old, Egyptian symbols, and shit that’s interesting that makes you keep wanting to watch.
And ounces of truth too. I watched one of the ones, I’m not going to say its name on YouTube that a lot of people are watching and it’s extremely fear inducing, but it’s like “Why did that have to be in nine parts?” You could have just set the whole thing in a one video thing. You got all of those views, all of those people continuing to click and it’s like, yeah, there’s someone who’s sitting behind these and making them. Keep that in mind! And I’m not just talking about conspiracy theories, I’m talking about even ‘The Social Dilemma’ documentary, there’s someone sitting and making that too. So I talked about this on my last Solocast, but I feel like right now there’s this big divide over censorship. And there’s a lot of the people are saying that Facebook and Instagram are overly censored, we can’t question anything, we can’t give other viewpoints, why are they censoring us, there must be truth to this because if it wasn’t true, they wouldn’t censor us. So there’s that whole red pill movement right now that’s kind of happening.
Oh, like the Matrix?
Yeah. Like the Matrix and they’re taking the red pill, that’s what they call it. So, then there’s this other movement which is like ‘The Social Dilemma’ etc. which are saying that these conspiracy theories that are not fact-checked or “fake news” is being spread like rapid fire and it could be very dangerous, it could have cult psychology in it, and Facebook needs to have more censorship to make sure that this isn’t being shared in the algorithm. Both things make sense, we don’t want to not be able to speak the truth and we also don’t want hate to be shared. But what is true?
Right! Yeah. Well to me it’s the censorship is a really slippery slope because it’s like “Do I want people spreading misinformation out into the world? Hell no! Do I think it needs to be regulated?”
The question is regulated by who?
Yes! But that’s the thing.
That’s what I like about podcasting, I put the shit out. It’s between me and the podcast. Imagine if I had a company, they’d be like “Yo Sahara, you’re getting a little too crazy.” This just happened with Joe Rogan. Joe Rogan is known for really questioning mainstream norms etc. and something happened this week that he was questioning the fires and potentially how they started etc. and he had to give an apology for doing that because they said that that wasn’t fact-checked etc. Again, we don’t want misinformation being spread, he’s a super-powerful person, if he says something all of these other people might believe it; if he’s told everyone to do something really violent, people might do it, I understand the power of that.
And, so now, where do we draw the line? Who gets to be the official fact-checker?
Yeah, who is in charge of moderating; who’s in charge and what’s there?
And what’s their business; what’s their agenda? That’s the one thing I liked about ‘The Social Dilemma’, it’s like, social media is a business and you are the product, don’t forget that. And I think we forget, we think it’s like “Social media, I get to share my true self” and it’s like “No, it’s a business model and what you are shown is extremely curated.”
Yeah, but look, that’s been happening since the beginning of time. I mean not the beginning of time, they (the cave men) didn’t have social media.
They had myths being shared and they probably stood bias in it.
Sure! Stories and different – I mean, what is religion? Their stories that have been curated for us to shape our values and our beliefs, and that’s a beautiful thing. But it’s never been done to this scale and apropos to ‘The Social Dilemma’ they did talk about how it’s never been done at this scale.
Look, my whole thing that I’ve always said and what I believe is – I’ve always been a good, well not interviewer; I asked questions, I love asking questions and I’m always going to inquire about things, especially things I can’t see. And I’m of the belief that you just have to question things, you just have to ask questions, that’s what makes us different than animals.
And questioning doesn’t mean the “Oh, where did you get that fact? Where’s your source on that? Where is this? Where is that?” I feel like a lot of people think it’s that, but it’s again, who made these sources, who funded these sources, who funded this research? That’s the thing that’s tricky with us, we’re trying to cling on to “What’s this board of truth?” It’s like why we created the UN – we’re like “All these Governments are going so ham, we need some sort of international government who can be non-bias, but look how it turned out, it’s still completely biased. So, I think that’s what we’re all globally figuring out, I trust that we will eventually, but it’s a completely new territory for us and especially with bots being created to spread misinformation.
So a lot of the different conspiracy theories out there, there are bots who are programmed to keep spreading them, so we’re like “Oh my God, it’s going viral” no, someone created that to go viral.
Yeah. Well, I remember somebody sent me a specific company video and the first thing I saw “Wow! Six million views” and it just makes you want to click because I’m like “Six million people have watched this” and then come to find out that said video had a lot of purchase buys (download buys) and I’m like “Oh, well that makes it easier to click on this because I feel like everybody else is doing it.”
It’s like if someone has a lot of followers, you assume “Oh, I’ll follow them because the other people are following them.”
Exactly! Oh just because they’ve got a million followers it means that they’re a guru or whatever.
And that’s the shadow side of that, but then the other side is like “Do we go back to the news where there’s six channels that are all owned by the same company and we can’t speak outside of it?”
No, look, I think that this is a very, very tall – it’s the Wild Wild West. It’s a very tall order for us to try and discuss even on this Podcast. I will never pontificate to know what is right and what is wrong, or who, or what, or where is the information. I think people need to start asking; inquiring within.
Inquire within! And connect to your joy too. It’s like we’re talking about all this stuff and it’s super, super heavy and what we always come down to and we kind of come back and talk about is – at the end of the day what matters is how you feel and how you’re living your life because the world is going to continue to do whatever the world is going to do, and eventually we do need to unplug from it a little bit.
A lot of it!
Because if we think that my happiness is dependent on who the president is; or my happiness is dependent on what’s going to happen in this, this, that, we’re not fully stepping into our full sovereignty yet, because, for example, my parents escaped from a Revolution. Imagine if they waited around saying “We’re just going to wait till the government changes and things” they would still be there and their lives would not have changed. They had to take their own control and say “We’re going create our own reality right now and start from scratch in doing so because we don’t want to wait for someone else to be our problem-solver.” So I think it’s like we get to all realize that – and I think for me, I like to delete my Instagram for a couple days a week, come back to it and I realize that when I delete my Instagram, all of these thing that I’m so worried or stressed – they’re gone, they’re actually not in my present reality. They’re other people’s opinions and stories and things that are being, essentially, sent over to me on the internet, but it’s not here in my reality. If we actually didn’t have the internet this year, 2020 would have gone down a very, very, very different way. I don’t know how but I don’t think the amount of stress and anxiety would’ve been there.
Yeah, I one hundred percent agree with you. Unplugging is such a healing experience because it brings you back down to this – you know, so many people I’m seeing are wanting to move out to a farm or a ranch, or people want to connect with Nature. And I think Nature is still such a healing remedy for so many and look, some people can’t go outside yet or some people still feel like they’re in fear, but I’m telling you, fresh air, seeing some green, walking around, moving your body, unplugging from technology, even for a short while, can really create an incredible shift in your mood, your energy, your health, your happiness, your ability to remember who and what you are. I mean, that’s the whole process of yoga, and meditation, and dance, and breathwork, and all these incredible practices that we do. We can’t do them while we’re doing something else, you have to do them. I can’t meditate and go on Instagram; I have to meditate and then go on Instagram.
Our time is so limited, it really is, there 1440 minutes in a day and they go by quickly. We think about it in terms of just our time on this planet. And I say that, and again, not to be morbid, but in a way to just reflect. There’s this quote “Your love is how you spend your time” and I think about that often because whenever I’m going down a rabbit hole or I’m doing whatever I’m doing and I’m mindlessly going throughout my day, and I feel totally disconnected to my body, I haven’t taken a shower, it’s 4 o’clock in the afternoon and I’m still doing nothing productive, I start to think “Wow, what did I do today that made me connect to joy or to my happiness, or to love? What did I do?” And instead of sitting there and then making myself feel bad “Agh! I wasted the whole day, the day is over, I just want to wait until tomorrow” I stop doing what I’m doing, I shut the computer down, I grab the dogs, I go for a walk around the block and then I take a shower, and then I instantly feel better. I instantly feel better, I feel totally refreshed, renewed and reconnected to what is real. I think about – there’s a friend of mine who recently got some, not great news, she got diagnosed with a very scary type of cancer; and we’ve been kind of chatting and she’s got a great team, she’s got a great support system and the conversation that we had did not involve anything that’s going on in the world. We were on for maybe 2 hours, not at one point did we discuss anything that was happening in the world. We were talking about the last vacation she went on, which was 2 years ago; she was talking about her 2 year-old, she’s got a 2 year-old daughter, her first word was a curse word, so she was talking about that and she was talking about how her mom was annoying her because of what’s happening and she’s like “It’s not like I’m dead! I got a diagnosis, we’re going to fight it and we’re going to be okay.” That conversation, although it was heavy to hear that information, we had a normal conversation about life and we were laughing, and we were making jokes, and we were just having a good conversation that didn’t revolve around anything heavy because it was something heavy pressing.
And so, let’s imagine that the state of the world right now is really heavy, because it is, we have a very bad diagnosis right now and I think we should spend our time doing things that are going to make us better; that are going to make us connect in a deeper way; that are going to help us connect with other people, even people that we don’t want to connect with, but before we even go there I think it’s important for us to get ourselves in a good space. A lot of the times we mistake that statement to “Well, I’m going to fix everybody else” and you can’t transmit something that you don’t have; so really focusing on what matters to you the most. I think about that for myself, I’m like “Wow, I went to bed that night thinking if that were me.” I’m not worried about what I’m going to fucking post on Instagram or if my book is going to be on The New York Times or whatever, I’m worried about spending time with my family and my friends, and just being able to see another sunset, and being able to see another full moon, or being able to be in the pool and be with my boyfriend and just talk about nothing.
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So beautifully shared, thank you for that! And I really think it puts things into perspective because I think a lot of us have put our lives on pause this year. The way that kind of Corona virus came on, it was sort of like “Okay, we’re going to take this two week pause and then things are going to go back to normal.” That two weeks became a month, two months, here we are, seven months in. What’s difficult I think is there was never really an “Okay, we can go back.” It’s like a weird, very prolonged fight right? It’s like “Are we cool now? Are we not?”
I see a lot of people are confused; they’re like “Wait!” Some of my friends have still not seen a single person since March because that’s what we were told to do. And some people do have immune issues or all sorts of things too that this is extremely serious for them and they can’t. My grandfather, he’s at the end of his life right now and it’s really sad because I can’t see him, because there’s a risk of me seeing him; and then also sad because he might die very soon (because he’s 94 years old) and I won’t get to…like my grandma, I didn’t get to go to her funeral. So it’s also this heaviness with it, and I think what’s difficult for us is because we’ve put our lives on hold; we haven’t been thinking about the sunsets; we haven’t been thinking about our joy; we haven’t been thinking about our Dharma because we’ve just been in this baseline survival mode. And we don’t know when this is going to end, and we don’t know what the next stage is going to look like so we, each individually, just get to bring back those things that made us happy.
And we were just chatting about this but I think a lot of the spiritual community right now is very focused on shadow work. This term ‘shadow work’ is a huge buzz word right now. We’ve known about this word and this topic for a lot of years, and doing shadow work and going into our fears has been an instrumental part of our journeys and continually; it’s not a one-time process, it’s a lifelong journey. And, what I feel like the world really needs right now too, is to go into their joy. Because I think if the world is so heavy right now, as it is, fires, natural disasters, politics, all sorts of things, and then we’re all sitting in our deepest darkest traumas, by ourselves, without community, and we look outside and we can’t even see the sun because of the smoke – that is a recipe for a downward spiral. It’s not about “Okay, just keep going into it, keep going into it” it’s like you go into it and you come back up for air and you’re like “Why am I doing this in the first place? I’m doing this so I can live a better life.” So when are we going to put that focus, even just for a bit of time, into living that better life?
Yeah, that’s one hundred percent. I don’t know what the fad has been, like setting up camp in that shadow world – I don’t know if that’s like a new thing. I’m kind of old-school in the whole you do some shadow work and then you go live your life. For me, anyway, in my experience, it’s been that it’s seasonal. And I’m not saying a whole entire season like “Oh, all of summer I was in shadow and now I’m going to be happy” hey, if that works for you, great. But we definitely do not set up camp there, some people can really go into this space because it’s familiar, they’re just used to being in shadow work and I don’t think that shadow work is safe for everyone. I think that; look, I have my own opinions about how I feel about shadow work and how it’s kind of a trending topic. I’m still of the mindset that you do shadow work with people that are experienced, a Shaman, a Healer, somebody who’s been experience in space, a Psychotherapist, somebody who has gone to school; practices that people have been teaching for a long time. And I think that it’s important for people; look, you can’t have light without the dark; you can’t have the dark without the light; and I think it’s all truly about finding that balance for yourself and really not setting up camp there. You don’t have to live there, and just because your virtual guru is telling you that you need to keep doing this shadow work when you’ve not seen anybody and you are feeling completely isolated and you feel totally alone. I would say, probably not a good time for you to be doing that now, but look, I’m not a qualified Psychotherapist or anything but I just, in my opinion, speaking practically, just as any person – if you’re in a space where you’re feeling disconnected, and isolated, and sad, and doing shadow work is creating a huge level of anxiety for you, then maybe you should stop doing it. Even just for a little bit, give yourself a break, just when we were talking about going down the conspiracy rabbit hole – just stop, disconnect, unplug your computer for a little bit.
Yeah, it comes down to, again, dualistic minds want to label – you’re either a light worker or a shadow worker, you can’t be both.
Really? I’ve not heard this.
Yes. It’s sort of feel like it was very manifestation; Abraham Hicks; positive, think positive, and then people realizing “Well you can’t just think positive” you get to go into your fears and realize what’s underneath them, that’s how you grow and then people are like “Oh wow, so I can’t just think positive, I’ve got to also go into my shadows” and then, I think everyone’s in this journey right now too, especially because we’re by ourselves in this intense time so that’s perpetuating that. But I think that if you are in the space too, we need more people also holding that light grid, of not everyone you talk to can be like “Hey, let’s talk about the most traumatic thing that’s ever happened to you in your entire life.” There are some people who are meant to be there; some people really play in those realms well, that is part of their Dharma and some people are like – you don’t want your Zumba teacher to become your shadow work teacher; your Zumba teacher is just here to teach you Zumba; your piano teacher is here to do this; your Akashi records person is here to be this channel. So let’s not jump into these trends of this is the right way to be spiritual, this is the right way to the “work” right now and let ourselves be where we’re being called to be. For myself, I, especially when I went into that rabbit hole, I’m like “This is not my realm, not it at all. I’m a joy priestess, I’m here to being joy, I’m here to bring embodiment, I’m here to being dance, I’m here to bring connecting back to Earth, and there will be a group of people who will need that, and there will be a group of people who need the shadow work, and there will be a group of people who need whatever it is. So know yourself and also be brave enough to stand into to what it is you believe in because yeah, even in the 1920s or whenever The Great Depression was (1920s or 30s) there were still jazz players, there were still speak easies, there was still art, they didn’t all stop because the world was in a very depressive place. We need people, always, to bring joy and laughter and love to the world, and what a beautiful thing if you get to do that.
Yeah, and now more than ever. There’s been so many – how come we’re not seeing the good stories of people helping each other and the stories of – there was this group of officers in, I think it was Houston, that were protecting the protesters – you know, it’s like the stuff that really creates that warming sensation where you remember that humans are, at their core, good. Yeah, there are bad people in the world – one hundred percent, I can name probably ten right now, but there are good people and there’s still beautiful things that this Earth has to offer us, and our ability to connect with our highest self and our joy and our happiness is still going to be ten times more powerful than any fear and anxiety that can be produced by some external factor, or internal factor. It’s just like everything else, we’ve had the entire majority of the year to practice uncertainty, anxiety and fear, because we’ve been in that weird limbo of “Are we cool? Are we not cool? Are we going out now? What do we do? Are we hugging? Are we not hugging? What’s the deal?”
Even if you meet someone you’re like “Err, Namaste, fist bumps” I don’t even know how to engage.
And because we want to respect everybody else’s feeling but at the end of the day… Be safe, obviously, don’t go out there to a fucking Covid party (like they’re doing) but it’s important for you to just listen and tune into yourself and what it is that you really want and what’s going to create that level of joy and happiness for you.
You posted a little TikTok right before you came over and I had to replay it four of five times because I thought it was so perfect. You were talking about connecting to that child-like play, and I know that’s something Shaman Durek talks about a lot – connecting to that child-like play. Or a couple of coloring books back there that sometimes I’ll go get my colors and I‘ll start coloring or I’ll go and bounce a ball outside – just to get myself out of the norm of just sitting at a computer and moving in a rigid way, to just cultivate that right side hemisphere brain, to reconnect us to that space of like “Oh, right, I’m a human. I’m a spiritual being living in a human body” and how can we connect more to that essence of us? How can we expand more into that movement, that creativity, that ability to move and connect and be happy? Where is our happiness? Where is our happiness right now? Where is our happiness as a community? Where’s our happiness as a culture, as a society, as a country? I know it’s a very loaded question to ask but ask that question. How about for you, for the individual, where is your happiness? What makes you happy? And when was the last time you did something to make you happy, genuinely happy? When was the last time you laughed; you laughed so hard that your stomach hurt? That kind of thing where we just haven’t experienced it very much this year and I think it’s time now is the time.
I think now is the time; we’ve done so much of this deep, deep work, and we need the other side right now because it’s not going to be balanced if all we do is just sit around and think about what’s wrong with the world. We need to be the Sun! Just as much as there’s the Moon, there’s the Sun, and cultivating, I call it being the ‘Sun Being’. ‘Being’ like the embodiment of the Sun that brings warmth and light and nourishment to the whole world and isn’t like “Ugh, that part’s shadowy, I’m not going to put my sunlight over there.” It’s “No, regardless, you just offer your sunlight and whoever wants it can have it, and whoever doesn’t, that’s fine too”; you’re going to keep living your life that way and I think that we’re afraid of people saying “Oh, you’re spiritual bypassing; or you’re not doing the work, or whatever.” Let people say whatever they’re going to say, we’re all fucking uncertain right now! Me and Rosie are uncertain too; we are all uncertain; we’re not giving you this Podcast; we haven’t figured out. We’re also talking this through every single day, and that’s the beautiful thing, you get to have these conversations. Talk to your friends, open up the conversations, start voice zoning each other, whatever it is; that’s what Rose Gold Goddesses is all about, find friends there, there’s so many beautiful spiritual soul sisters who would love to have these conversations with you, but really what matters at the end of the day is are you happy? Because all of this information, where is it going to take us if we can’t experience the point of life which is to live a life of enjoyment in align with our Dharma; it’s keeping us from that. And to me, that’s what I realize, I don’t want to do anything that’s keeping me from living a life that I incarnated to live on this planet. So have the awareness, know what’s happening, if it’s serving you, if you’re able to bring light into it, but come back to your natural essence. And if you’re so tied into this circular spiral of social media, you won’t even know what your natural… I haven’t even noticed – I follow great people on Instagram or TikTok or whatever – TikTok is a little bit harder because you don’t get to choose what shows up, so sometimes curve balls will come; but I’ll still even notice the days that I’m not on it, like the weekends, I just delete it from my phone (Instagram) that I’m just a happier person naturally, even if I’m following spiritual accounts because there’s something in that being on your phone and scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, and being stimulated by one message after the next in such a short period of time that really does something to your brain chemistry. Never have I ever gone off Instagram just smiling.
Oh my God! I was just literally going to say the same thing.
Unless Jared Leto…just kidding.
Never have I ever gotten off social media and felt great.
Never! I feel numb. You tap out! And I think sometimes…
I see friends and I don’t even like stuff now, I just go through it.
No one even likes it because you don’t even want to stop to like, let alone a comment. And I notice that sometimes when I’m scrolling too, it’s like you want to stop but you can’t stop, and you’re like “Okay, this is the last video I’m going to watch, or the last post I’m going to read” but something in you makes you keep going and that’s how it’s designed to be. It’s designed to make you spend as much time as possible. I think the biggest contributor to our mental health crisis right now is this. Social media is great in so many ways and we can use it consciously to spread our message. I’m sure so many of you found this Podcast through social media, and at times like this that are extremely overwhelming, don’t feel bad to take time off.
Yeah, one hundred percent! It’s so important.
I actually made little unicorn head pieces, and it felt so good to use my hands first of all, because I saw this really funny, but not funny, meme and it was like doing my meditation – you’re on your phone; eating – on your phone; working – on your phone; socializing – on your phone; everything that we’re doing right now is in the same position – on your phone. I noticed I fucking sit on the same chair; I live my life on that chair – work, eat, this, that, I’m like “Dude, me and this chair are married at this point.”
So, just to do something, sit in another area of your house, use your hands, knit, do something that does not have a productive purpose besides just making you feel happy and making you remember that you’re human. I think we need to just human sometimes – sit in the sun, walk around, roll on the ground. Kids, they’re humaning all the time, it’s so natural for them, but we forget, we become so focused on “What’s the productive thing for me to do next” that we don’t realize that physically, we’re in the exact same posture day in and day out.
Yeah, and just a little reminder to you – the only time I was able to astro-project was when I was staring out the window, just bored. So if you want to cultivate your psychic abilities…
Can you tell us about your astro-projection story?
No, it’s fine.
A little snip-it.
Yeah, a little snip it. Oh my God, that’s so funny; it’s in the yoga journal article, right?
So, me, Sahara, Tara and Allison went to a Panchakarma in the Blue Ridge Mountains in North Carolina, at the Art of Living Center, and Allison and I were the only ones that were doing the – we were doing the exact recipe for the Panchakarma, and Sahara and Tara were kind of doing the Panchakarma Light. And one of the days during the – what is it called?
It’s that last day when you were in silence.
Yeah. So there is one day that is the Purge (The Big Purge Day) and we’re supposed to observe silence, and we can’t meditate, can’t pray, can’t journal, can’t read, can’t listen to music, can’t basically do anything but stare out the window. And let me tell you. The view outside the window; the cascading trees; The Blue Ridge mountain; it is a beautiful view; it’s a beautiful landscape, there’s birds, it is gorgeous! So, not a bad place to be looking out the window but it was basically 9am and ten minutes into staring out the window I was like “I can’t do this” you can’t fall asleep, you can’t go to sleep either. So basically you had to just be bored, really, being bored. And I couldn’t, I went through the whole spectrum of emotions, I don’t actually know if I talked to you about this, but I went from being really into it – you’d see a bird and you’re like “Oh! There’s a bird! Oh my God, there’s a butterfly! There’s a butterfly right outside, oh my God!” Any stimulation other than just trees moving in the wind was very exciting. And I, thirty minutes in I was like “I can’t do this” and then you start to think about your life; and then I’m reflecting and then I’m having memories that I hadn’t had in so long, and then I’m angry at my parents, and then I’m like “Oh, my childhood sucked.” Then you start to go in to that whole thing and then this beautiful thing happened – and I akined it to running a marathon (I’ve run four marathons) and I akined it to that experience, that physiological experience where there’s a moment where you stop feeling pain in your body and you’re just going through the motions. So I’m sitting there staring out the window, just sitting there and I just started to feel like a deep connection to everything and it was a very euphoric experience. And at that point I looked at the time and oddly enough the time had gone by really quickly, just staring out the window, and Maida came in (our little caretaker) and said “Okay, now it’s done, you can take a nap now and we’ll bring you your first meal in two hours or something. So, I was going to meditate and I’m like “So, I’m just going to sit” because I felt really spiritual in that moment, I’m like “I’ve just totally connected right now, I’m not going to stop, I’m just going to really go in extra. And so I sat and tried to meditate, but then the minute I closed my eyes I’m like “Oh no, I need to lie down” so I laid down and as I laid down I was fully awake, I would almost say I was in that space between sleep and awake, it’s the space I often describe in practicing yoga nidra. And yoga nidra (if you don’t know what yoga nidra is) nidra means sleep and yoga nidra is a sleep-based meditation practice. It has a deeper meaning than that so those of you, if you’re yoga nidra nerds, I’m sorry that I’m basterdizing the definition, but for most people to understand it that’s what yoga nidra is. It rides on the biology of your body and puts you in a deep state of relax present awareness; you’re in the theta brain wave state. And I think I was in that state, and I decided; I felt myself floating and I could see my body and I was just kind of going with it; it felt very dream-like and I just wanted to go visit my friends, so I went into Ally’s room and I saw her laying down in a very specific way; I saw exactly what she wasn’t wearing etc. and then I went to go visit Tara and she was journaling; and then I wanted to go visit Sahara, and I saw her on this little elliptical machine with her little cap on, exactly like – in my mind’s eye, I was seeing her – she’s on the phone, it was right before her wedding, she was going to check out a wedding venue and she’s speaking Spanish on the phone and then I hear her say “Hasta luego” and then hangs up. And I came back in my body and that was it, and for some reason, for some crazy reason, we didn’t see each other that night. I think it was the following day, the next morning, I saw the girls and I felt called, compelled to ask them what they were doing at that time, and before they answered I described to them what I thought I was dreaming, I was astro-projecting, whatever was happening, I told them what I was seeing, and funny enough they were doing something very similar, and when I told you specifically, you were totally baffled because you were like “That’s exactly what I was doing” and that’s exactly what you said on the phone.
It’s interesting because I was on the elliptical earlier that day and then I had a Zoom call with this photographer in Mexico, and at the end of the conversation, something came over to be like “Hasta luego” in the most American; like an expat who lives in Mexico – Hasta luego! Something compelled me to say it like that. So you literally saw the two things that I did that day in one vision that you would’ve never known. And it almost felt like this ‘the word came through me.’
Yes, so strange. It was very interesting. But anyway, be bored, just stare out the window, let yourself be…
If you want to see what your ex is doing, just get bored.
Just to go back, because that; it really struck me, that experience – I think it was just the purging, the cleansing, it was the feeling really clear, I was very satwik. And I think there was something really – and like I said, the only way to describe it was that it was very euphoric. And in fact, I tried to recreate it a couple times even after that; that feeling of just… When you’re connected and you’re in that state of connection, the way I describe it is feeling like that warm blanket as you’re staring into a fire or something; you’re cozy; you’re warm; you’re connected; you’re connected to the elements; you’re connected to everything and everyone.
But elements I think are major assistors in doing that. I find it very difficult for me to just sit in my room and just do nothing; it’s very, very hard. Unless you’re meditating, it’s very difficult to just sit and stare out the window in your own house. However, I find that when I’m in water, the ocean, a pool etc. you are doing nothing. When you’re swimming you’re not really doing anything, you’re just floating around so it gives your mind that opportunity to get into that flowing; thoughts are coming in and out; you’re sort of meditating, sort of not; you’re just in that void naturally because you’re surrounded by the water. If you’re staring at the ocean, if you’re in nature on a hike, so these elements are assisting us to get to our baseline of purity. That’s what we are, and when we said the word ‘satwik’ that’s what it means, it’s the ultimate cleanliness, purity and that’s what we truly are, that’s are true essence. However, our world is very rajasic, which is very aggressive, fire, Pitta. Social media is extremely rajasic, the world is rajasic. And then tamasic, the quality of tamas is very dull and heavy.
Yeah, inertia. Just feeling like you stayed in for a really, really long time, which a lot of people experienced this year too with staying at home; it brought up a lot of tamas for people. So coming back to that satswa is coming back to the elements, coming back to nature. Technology is, again, it does have, I think, light codes in it, ideas swirling, there’s a feminine consciousness to technology, and I think that we can really side with it and it can assist us in some ways, however, most of us are letting ourselves be used by it, we’re not using technology, we’re letting ourselves be used by it. So, take the power back. Snap it back!
Yeah! Snap it back! Take the power back!
And look what awaits – you being able to see what we’re all doing in another room, from just one day of sitting alone, that automatically happened. Imagine what weeks, months, years of that could do.
It’s like I’ve never regretted taking technology breaks. It’s like I think about it like with drinking – with drinking, I never regretted not drinking, I always regretted drinking. The next morning to me, my practice is the most sacred thing, and in the morning, my morning time that’s like my miracle, manifesting, connection time. The morning time is the most sacred time of the day for me and it’s so much a part of my daily ritual that I need to have that experience for me to feel connected to the world. And I don’t like to do anything that’s going to fuck with that. I go to bed at a certain time; I don’t eat past a certain time…
Yeah, you live your life to have that time
And so, with drinking, it was affecting that and I didn’t like that. I would wake up and I’d regret it every single time. I never woke up after drinking and said “Oh, I’m so glad I drank last night, I had the best time” it was always like “No, I feel like shit, I don’t ever want to drink ever again!” (cut to the next day and you’re drinking). But I’m going to compare it to technology. I’ve never taken a social media break and regretted it. I’ve never been off social media for a week and been like “Oh, I’m settled down!”
Here’s the thing – it’s so easy to catch up. I think that’s our fear “I’m going to be out of the loop. I’m not going to know what’s happening in the world or what we can and can’t say this week” and it’s like “Don’t worry, do a couple scrolls and you’ll catch up real fast.”
Yeah, you’re fine. Right before I decided to write the book actually, one of my ideas was to be off social media for a year. I’ve been wanting to do that for so long, which can still potentially happen, maybe soon. If somebody’s listening to this and you’re called to do it, try it and let us know how it is.
Our businesses are tied to social media so that’s the difficult thing too, and a lot of people listening – their businesses are from social media, but if you’re someone who doesn’t need to be on there, you get to take that break if you want.
Yeah, you do that break!
Let us know how it is. So yeah, I think we all get to assess our relationships, snap the cat back sometimes and come back in and be like “Okay, here’s how I want to be.” I put a timer on my Instagram so I can only be on for one hour, but then I keep saying “Remind me in 15 minutes.” But I’m trying to be better at it, but it all interconnects into the only reason why we would suggest that is so that you can tune into your own truths. Some people don’t need it. Some people I know, they’re like “I forget to post for days. I forget to even go on social media” I’m like “Wow! Amazing!” And it could be something else; it could be too many TV shows or whatever else.
For us it’s definitely that. I definitely try to limit myself on social media; I don’t actually think that I have a problem there. I think for me now, since Covid has been the Netflix binging because, I, for the longest time, we didn’t have a TV in the bedroom.
Now you’ve got one? They say that’s the number one relationship killer; sex life killer!
Oh my goodness, right?! It is the worst, I get addicted so then I go for…
I really think it’s a 90s baby thing, falling asleep with the TV on.
Yeah. Totally! It’s like “I’m not relaxed unless the TV’s on.”
Just falling asleep and waking up to the commercials at 2am, something so soothing about it!
It’s so prana depleting.
It’s 10pm – do you know where your kids are? It’s super prahna depleting. See, my issue is, I can never find a show that I like so I don’t really get hooked onto shows because I just don’t resonate with any of them.
You’re so lucky! Tory is literally, and that’s a part of what he’s doing right now, so it’s like screening, it’s research; and some of these storylines are really – I love – Look, I grew up in LA, I know a lot of people in the entertainment industry, I know a lot of screenwriters, I know a lot of film makers. And I love film, I really love film; I love story-tellers and I love to read novels.
So for me, the medium of art via film is very – I love it. It’s also nostalgic for me because I grew up going to a movie theater with my family, it was the only family time we had, going to the movies and going to the beach, that was it. So, I enjoy it, I just don’t need to – now with the way Netflix is with a show it’s like…
In four seconds they put on the next episode.
Yeah and I’m like “Oh my goodness!” In the beginning of Covid, I’d stay up till 1-2 o’clock in the morning and you know, that’s not my norm.
Because you’re waking up at 4am.
Oh yeah, 9pm, I’m in deep REM; at 9pm I’m already in a deep sleep.
I’m eating dinner. But I’ve always been a late sleeper; I know it’s not very Ayurvedic.
I have – you do what you do – we’ve talked about the chronotypes, right?
Yes, I am the, I think it’s called the Bear?
Yeah, the bear, you’re the bear. Any I actually have a quiz that I’m doing so that you can find out what your chronotype is and what yoga nidra is best for you to do.
Can you tell us a little bit about this?
Yeah. So there are four different types of chronotypes and I’ll actually put the link so if people want to read more.
Yeah, we’ll have that link in the show notes.
Yeah, so you can read about what the chronotypes are, and like I was talking about earlier about yoga nidra. For me right now, the most important thing that my students are struggling with is sleep and yoga nidra is something that everybody can do. Not everybody can do asana movements; not everybody feels comfortable doing yoga or starting yoga, especially now, not having somebody, a teacher doing it online. And some people might be more inspired to do yoga doing yoga online.
So yoga nidra is basically – you’re lying on your back or you’re lying in a comfortable position, and like I said, it is a guided sleep-based meditative practice that actually takes you into a deep state of consciousness. It rides on the biology of your body so it takes you through all of the senses to put you in a deep state of relaxation. And there’s a lot of studies being done with yoga nidra, with healing PTSD, healing trauma, healing different – well, I don’t want to say “Oh, you’re just going to heal you” so disclaimer. It’s a practice that’s being used in accordance with whatever therapeutic practices they’re doing, and it’s because it’s very accessible for everybody. And the body, given the opportunity, will heal itself by itself. Your body, when it’s contracted and when it’s in fear or anxious, is not allowing your body to heal, it’s in flight or fight, or freeze. So when you’re in yoga nidra and you’re able to go into a deep state of relaxation, guess what happens – your body’s relaxed; rest and digest; your body’s able to go into that parasympathetic nervous system which is rest and digest as opposed to being in the sympathetic nervous system which is the fight, flight or freeze.
So yes, yoga nidra – there are different types of yoga nidras. The Yoga Nidra School that I come from with my teacher yoga Robert Striker, is Tantra, so it’s tantric lineage, and there are different types of yoga nidra. People can find tons of yoga nidra – there’s great yoga nidra – that’s my Tibetan bell or glass bowl for grounding. There’s a lot of great yoga nidra teachers out there. Inside Timer has some good yoga nidra practices; I’ve got a couple on YouTube as well, but there are a couple of practices that I recorded for the four different types of chronotypes.
So, maybe one yoga nidra is more focused on relaxing certain areas or certain energies of the body more than others because you might need a different type of focus on your chronotypes since you’re having dinner at 9pm.
So what are the four chronotypes?
Alright, so we’ve got the Bear chronotype which is the one you said that you are. Most people, under the bear chronotype, it means their sleep and wake cycle goes according to the Sun. So the bear wakes up easily and typically falls asleep with no problem; productivity seems best before noon; and they’re prone to that dip between 2-6.
Okay, and what time do they sleep?
Typically around 11 or 12.
Okay, I’m like a late bear.
I sleep at 11 or 12 I would say.
Okay, so we have the Wolf chronotype, and the wolf has trouble waking up in the morning.
I don’t have trouble waking up.
And typically their peak productivity starts around noon.
Yeah, that’s true for me.
And then you get another boost around 6 o’clock.
I guess that just depends on what I’m doing. I’m like a Wolf-Bear.
Okay. But next one’s the Lion. So unlike Wolves, Lions are early birds, like me (so I’m a lion), they wake up before the dawn, they do their best work before noon. I get a little bit of a dip during around 11 or 12 o’clock, I start to feel myself, my best productivity happens in the morning, all my emails, all my stuff.
So you just wake up and you’re like – oh you do your practices and you’re ready to work.
Yeah, I do my practices. 8 o’clock, I’m getting work done, I’m writing, I’m doing everything; before noon. So by noon my day is done.
See, I start my work day at noon; noon to 6 or 7pm.
Yeah, I’m feeling like you’re more a Wolf, not a Bear.
But I don’t have trouble waking up. I wake up at 9am.
You’re a Wolf-Bear.
And then, typically the Lion goes to bed between 9-10pm.
Then there’s the Dolphin. I feel like you’re a Dolphin because a Dolphin has a hard time following any schedule. They often don’t get enough sleep because they’re sensitive to noise and light; their peak productivity is from 10-2, but they kind of have a hard time with having a legitimate sleep schedule.
No, I sleep pretty easily, I don’t wake up. But I love dolphins; I’d love to be one.
I know. Well there’s more information. Look, if you guys want to learn more about the chronotypes there is, I think his name is Dr. Cohen…
Yeah, sleep doctor.
Yeah, he is the one that coined the chronotypes. He did a lot of research about them so we can probably link his. You can probably do a chronotype quiz on his as well. But the one I created was sort of, just blanketed questions to just understand what your sleep cycles are because the practices were created for each specific chronotype.
So the Bear, yoga nidra will be more focused on sankalpa, so it’ll be a sankalpa based yoga nidra. The Lion chronotype will be yoga nidra for cognition, so it will be a little bit more focused on that. The Dolphin will be yoga nidra for spiritual awakening. And the yoga nidra for the Wolf will be yoga nidra for transformation.
Yeah, I actually went to talk to a sleep doctor and he was talking about them and he was saying how a lot of artists are the Wolf because at night time, and it makes sense because 8pm – 2am in Ayurveda is Vata time. Actually, sorry, 10pm – 2am is Pitta time, 2am – 6am is Vata time. So that second wind that we get is 10pm. So traditionally in Ayurveda, before we had electricity, you couldn’t stay up all night so that would be your time for peak sleep (between 10pm and 2am) so that’s when you’re getting your highest REMs because you’re waking up super early. Whereas for me, especially if I’m writing a book, that’s my best writing time because I’m so full of energy because I’m not getting texts, I’m not getting emails, the world is energetically quiet and I can just be so – that’s my most, I’m so on. And then at 2am it turns into more like philosophical. Steven, that’s when he’s making all his music and channeling, and that actually – in Kundalini yoga and in Buddhism, that’s when they’re doing their Kriyas at 4am, or they’re doing their most spiritual things at 4am, which is peak Vata time.
So I find it interesting because in traditional Ayurveda, for sure, you’re supposed to wake up very early, sleep early etc. but it was a very different time, they did not have the internet, they didn’t have all of these things; and I do think, biologically, yeah, we are different. I, even when I was in elementary school would sleep at 11pm; I would pull all-nighters when I was in middle school, that’s just who I am. So if I didn’t have those I actually wouldn’t have been able to write my books, because that’s when I am creative, During the day I’m just kind of doing the things I need to do. So ride it, if that’s your best work; if it helps you bring you towards your Dharma then do it.
Yeah and I think it’s great to be able to just utilize the time that you have and get more in sync with that, and to know that about yourself. Yeah, that’s why I wanted to create specific yoga nidras for each – and look, you can do all four. You can absolutely do all four practices, and I would recommend to do all four practices to just have the experience. But I think it’s important for people to know what works best for them. I’m a morning person. My little sister is like you, she is a night owl, she likes to be up at night, she does all of her school work, everything happens at night and she doesn’t wake up till noon.
I don’t ever actually remember being that person; I’ve always been a morning person. I love the morning time, I just always have. I want to be able to just get those morning rays and to see the light hit the trees as it’s coming up. Like I said, it’s just a magical time and I just love to see it. But the minute the sun goes down, that alerts my body that I’m ready for bed.
Yeah, that’s very connected to the circadian rhythm cycles. That’s why I actually like going to Bali, it’s because it’s the only time I get to see the sunrise because I’m jet-lagged. I used to love being jet-lagged because I’m like “Great, this will make me hopefully sleep earlier” but then quickly my body goes back to whatever cycle it’s in. You know it’s innate because I don’t need to wake up at a certain time, my body is choosing to be like this.
Yeah, and you have to listen to that, you truly do. That’s why I like the work he did because it’s so interesting to know that there are different chronotypes. I wonder how diggidy your chrono – if you have a different chronotype as the person you’re dating, I wonder what that’s like.
Well Steven is definitely more Wolf than I am. He sleeps much late, he sleeps at 6am, he’s a full on all-nighter. So, it’s interesting because we’re both also projectors in human design that do best of their sleeping alone. So I kind of get to have that alone sleeping experience because I’ll sleep, let’s say it’s at midnight, maybe 1am, and I’m fast asleep by the time he comes to bed, I don’t even notice; so he then gets his hours in bed. So it actually kind of works well but let’s say if I was to hook up with some early bird, they would hate me. When we went on vacation, they’re like “We want to do this sunrise hike” I’d be like “Okay, I’ll stay up all night to make it there.”
Well it’s funny because Tory was not a morning person. He used to work all night and in the beginning it was fine because you’re dating somebody; you’re of just like “I love you for how you are” and then…
And you’re like “Look bitch, if you want this to work…”
Like “Listen, you’d better get your shit together and wake up early!”
But actually, notice, because my mom would say the same thing. She’s an early bird like you and I think our society sees that if you wake up early, it’s very Puritan, the early bird catches its worm; early is the right way to be. But a lot of the best artists of our time were night owls. And our school, I remember our school, in high school, it started at 7:30 in the fucking morning. The first three hours I don’t even think I knew what was going on because my mind couldn’t even register it.
Yeah, well that’s why it’s so important to understand the chronotypes; for kids too because not all the children are going to be learning up at 7 o’clock in the morning.
I think high school kids too, they naturally sleep later and wake up later. I don’t know why scientifically, but…
But I think if they paid more attention to that rhythm, that they would probably get a lot more productivity from kids.
Yeah, even Daylight Savings Time. It’ really tough because when Daylight Savings happens, the majority of the people who are working 9-5 jobs don’t get to see the sun because by the time you get back from work it’s 5-6pm. Here, the sun, when it’s winter, it’s setting at 4:30pm so it’s really throwing us off biologically. But the good thing about quarantine that I was actually thinking about was – we get to spend that time at home so you do get to, even if before you had an hour long commute and you didn’t get to see the sun or you didn’t get to go outside, we all have that opportunity right now. Even though it’s really tough and it’s really chaotic, we should all remember the times that we were wishing that we got to spend more time at home. I think a lot of people, especially in corporate, I worked at an ad agency for a very short amount of time when I was in college, and I hated it.
I cannot picture you working at a corporate job.
At a corporate job? It was not a good sight. But I remember the conversations were like “Oh my God, imagine if we could work at home” that was the goal, you made it if you could work at home, and now a lot of us, not all of us, there’s still frontline workers, there are still people having to report to offices, but a lot of us do have the opportunity now to work at home, so these practices we did not have time for, we get to implement them in.
Yeah, well, a part of what I was saying last year, I’m sure you remember this, but all I wanted to was just be at home, all I wanted to do was be at home.
Yeah, you were travelling so much.
Oh my goodness! I was like “All I want to do is just be at home, that’s all I want” and that’s literally all I’ve done this year.
I remember with Steven and I, our biggest issue in our marriage was that he would always have to go travel because of these shows, there was all these festivals in different places and I’m like “You’re always gone, you’re always travelling” or he’d had to go to client dinners and then the studio at night, and this and that, but I was like “I don’t get to see you that much.” Trust me, not seeing him enough is not a problem anymore, I’m like “When is that festival starting again?”
I don’t like leaving tomorrow morning, I’m going to Portland.
There’s also such beauty in these times that we get to grow and have these practices, so many great things.
So thank you for this beautiful conversation! I just love having my besties on, so we just get to talk and dive in, and people can just hear a normal ass conversation.
Two non-experts just figuring out life! Back at you in the studio!
So where can listeners connect with you, download your beautiful Chakra Guide, as well as learn more about these yoga nidra archetypes?
Yeah, they can just go to radicallyloved.com or they can follow me on Instagram @rosieacosta that’s it.
Yes! Thank you so much!
Thank you, thank you so much, you’re the best and I’m so grateful you’ve built such a beautiful community, and I’m just so honored to be here and to be with all of you guys listening. Thanks!
Thank you sister queen, Namaste!
[1:43:40] End of Interview
What a deep dive, we really went there, right?! And sometimes that’s what you need, to have these super deep conversations with your friends that just kind of go into all of the little corners of your mind, the things you’ve been kind of thinking about on your own and just have someone to reflect that back to you. So I hope what this Episode gave you is to feel like you were that third friend sitting with us on the couch, talking about these things. And I hope it instigates your own insights and viewpoints and awareness which you totally do not have to share with us. And I invite you to begin these dialogues with your friends and the people that you trust; and how important it is to have confidantes that we can explore these things with and not feel like you’re a burden or you’re crazy or no one wants to hear what’s on your mind, but it’s actually a beautiful thing and something that we all deeply deserve and need to be able to share so openly and fluidly with your friends.
So, if you’re looking for more friends, spiritual friends, who want to talk about these things, who want to have these deep conversations and kind of question the meaning of life and social media, and all of it, then I invite you to join us in Rose Gold Goddesses. This is my Sacred Sisterhood Collective all about embodying the Goddess within. We have monthly Goddess circles, we actually have one coming up this Sunday, featured on a new Goddess every single month so we tune into that Goddess archetype. So, for example, last month we were working with Ixchel which is all about the womb and connecting to your divine feminine energy; we’ve worked with Lakshmi, all about abundance; Saraswati, all about creativity; and Quan Yin, on compassion; and Bridget, all about new beginnings; and Kali Ma, all about releasing your former self, and so many more.
So, when you join you have access to all the Goddess Circles that we’ve done. It includes my Top Workshops, Masterclassess, E-Courses, from Healing and Embodiment through Dance, Awakening Your Powers with shaman Durek, Sex Money Magic with Alexandra Roxo. We have monthly expert calls, expert guests from The Highest Self Podcast, hopping on a Zoom call with you guys, answering your questions, doing rituals, doing practices with you. We do monthly member-led workshops so you’re able to share your gifts with the community, whether it is breathwork, or story-telling, or anything it is, we welcome it all in Rose Gold Goddesses. So you can find the link in the show notes, it is rosegoldgoddesses.com and we’re super-excited to invite you inside.
If you loved this Episode, I would love to send you a free gift which is the first half of my unreleased book “Eat Right for Your Mind Body Type“. This is a different book than “Eat Feel Fresh“. My first book ever which is not released anywhere, and I am gifting it exclusively to those who leave a review of my Podcast in the iTunes store. So all you’ve got to do is head over to iTunes where you’re maybe listening to this Podcast and leave a review, take a screenshot that you’ve left it and email it over to me at [email protected] and I will send you back the first half of my unreleased book “Eat Right for Your Mind Body Type“, which goes all into Ayurveda, Doshas, Plant-Based Nutrition, Body Types – all of the things in a really fun and engaging way. So this is my gift to you for free for supporting the Podcast. Every single review I personally read. It really helps the Podcast be listened to by more people so we can raise the vibration of the planet together, and I am soul grateful to have you on this journey.
Thank you so much for listening and I’ll see you on the next Episode. Namaste.
Episode 320: The Social Dilemma + Finding Balance In The Craziness with Rosie Acosta
by Sahara Rose