We all know to live the life of our dreams, we must raise our vibrations. But EVERY DAY we’re doing LITTLE things that are decreasing our vibration that we may not be aware of. I was doing one EVERY day until this podcast episode. Learn more about them in this episode. 

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Transcription

Episode 028 – Little Things That Are Lowering Your Vibration

By Sahara Rose

Namaste. This is Sahara Rose, and welcome back to the “Highest Self” podcast. A place where we discuss what makes you your soul’s highest evolvement. This is a little impromptu podcast episode. I wanted to discuss because it’s something that I noticed in my own spiritual practice that I think is going to benefit all of you. And it’s little things that mess with your vibration. So what is a vibration first of all? Your vibration is your vibe, which is a term that we’re more familiar with, and it’s essentially the energy that you’re giving off. And what it really is, is the space between the atoms that you are compromised of, the level of vibration that’s going between those. So someone who’s high vibration, they’re thinking positive thoughts, they’re feeding their body healthy food. It actually found to emit a more high vibration energy because they are more full of prana—life force. And this is something that Ayurveda has proved through their own systems for thousands and thousands of years.

So your vibe is basically what you are manifesting, what you’re getting back. If anyone has ever heard of the law of attraction, Esther Hicks, she channels Abraham Hicks, or saw the secret. It always says whatever comes back to you is based on your vibration. It’s not that the law of attraction is whatever you think you get, but it’s if you elevate your vibration, those things will happen to you. So really the law of the universe to be operating at a high frequency and to, you know, create the life that you’ve dreamed of, which is your dharma is to always, always, always maintain a high vibration.

So in this episode, I want to discuss little subtle things that might be messing with your vibe. And it’s something that I just noticed in myself, something I was doing every single day. And then today I just had the realization like wow, that’s lowering my vibration every single day, which is just making me less able to, you know

• hold up a microphone and be able to channel a source

• less able to write books

• less able to connect with people

• less able to manifest

• create synchronicities

All of that, all of that is related to your vibration.

So your life is going to be flowing at the level of your vibration. When you’re vibrating higher, things come to you, it’s no longer a push. Life is no longer a struggle. The things that you think in your mind will just manifest into reality. So let’s say you have really, really been wanting a position as a writer, and then magically, someone offers you a position as a writer. That’s the law of attraction, that’s your vibration. You increased your vibration, and the universe is now creating a higher vibration reality for you.

So this is why increasing your vibration is so important because it’s literally the life that you’re creating for yourself. It doesn’t matter how rich you are, how poor you are, how much material success you have. If you’re not vibrating at a high level, it literally doesn’t mean anything because as we know, there are plenty of people who, on the books, have all the money, all the success in the world, but they’re miserable. And it’s because they’re seeing the world out of low vibration eyes. They’re seeing jealousy, they’re feeling guilt, they’re feeling angry. These are all low vibration emotions.

• So any time you feel jealous of someone, you’re lowering your vibe.

• Any time that you don’t feel good about yourself, lowering your vibe.

• Any time that you say something bad about someone else, lowering your vibe.

• You tell a lie, no matter how small it is.

• You practice anything that’s totally not true to yourself and helpful to all living being things around.

All of these things are lowering your vibe, so it’s just as much about you as it is as the entire planet. So together when we are working together, when our dharma is aligned with the needs met by the earth, we are increasing our vibration. And to keep continuing that to say, universe, yes, I want more, give me more. You can ask the universe for more and it will give it to you, as long as you’re doing the personal work of increasing your vibration, being the best person that you can be.

Best doesn’t mean that you’d become selfless and you don’t take care of yourself because you’re always taking care of everyone else. No, it’s increasing your vibration, making sure that you are the person that you would want this earth to be filled with. You’re doing all the practices that you preach, then you’re helping the world that way from a much more subtle, but deeper level, which is from a vibration.

So let’s discuss little ways that you might be lowering your vibration. So what came up today for me is that every single day I walk to a yoga class, or a pilates class, or something. And the front of my building, there’s a road, and the ocean is right there, it’s beautiful. But if I exit for the back of my building, I can go through the alley, the alley has tons of like it’s basically where all the garbage disposals are. There’s like a burger restaurant that their ventilation goes into that alley, so it smells like really strong like dead animals. And it’s where a lot of homeless people congregate at night, so it smells like pee everywhere. There’s like needles on the floor. It’s definitely not a high vibration place.

But everyday to save like 30 seconds to one minute, I walk through the back alley because I say, “Oh well, you know, what’s the point of going from the front door and circling around the block just so I don’t have to walk through this alley for 30 seconds. It’s not a big deal.” So every single day, I cringe, I’m walling through this alley, in my head I’m thinking, “This is disgusting. Oh my god. It smells so bad. Oh my god.” The meat is like blowing on my face, and I’m like, “Okay, breathe.” Like I can’t even breathe because it’s so disgusting. But every single day I still do it because it’s going to save me 30 seconds.

And today, I walked out from that alley, and as I was coming back, I could see like the trucks loading to like fill up the trash, and I was like ready to like hold my breath and like just go in. And I was like, “Wait. Why am I doing this to myself? Like what is the purpose of saving 30 seconds to be in misery when I’m actually decreasing my vibration for the whole rest of the day just from these 30 seconds.” Because as you know, 30 seconds can change your life. Like you can have the most amazing 30 seconds ever, you’re like skydiving, and you’ll think about it for the rest of your life, but when it’s something negative like this, we don’t realize how much it impacts us.

Now, I’m not saying that never do anything negative that you don’t like to be. No, I when I was in India, I was teaching health and sanitation in the slums of India. This is nothing compared to the slums of Bombay and Delhi, where you’re walking on pure trash everywhere. But that came from vibratory state. That was, “I’m here to help you. I’m here because I want to be.” I was embracing the smells and the colors and everything because I was there out of my own will, and I was increasing my vibration being in even worse garbage. But, the fact that walking through that alley is not necessary, it’s not helping anyone, it’s just a choice that I’m making for my own selfish reason to save 30 seconds. It’s not changing the planet, it’s just making me more miserable. Why do it?

So, this realization was profound for me because it’s like little things like that that you’re doing every single day. Something that brings you suffering, and there’s no purpose to it. You don’t need to do it. And actually, most of the things in our lives are those things. Even something like, “Ugh, I have to go to work. I hate going to work.” You’re sitting at your desk, you’re miserable, you hate it, it sucks, you hate your boss, you hate all of that, such negativity.” Actually, you don’t need to be there, you really don’t.

And you might tell yourself, “No, I need the money.” There are other ways to make money. “No, I can’t find another job.” Of course you can find another job. People switch jobs every single day. Most people do not stick with a career for the rest of their lives. It’s up to you if you choose to step out of your comfort zone and have it. And yes, at the beginning, it’s going to feel like freefalling, and you don’t know when you’re ever going to land. Trust me, I was there. But if you continue and you find that strength and that home and that anchor within yourself, it doesn’t matter if you’re freefalling because you create your own parachute. And you will catch yourself when you fall with your own strength and will.

So other things that are decreasing our vibration: little choices, using bad body products. So when we’re using like Suave shampoo and like, you know, whatever CVS brand soap, and all of these just disgusting, chemical, parabin-filled body products, soaps, shampoos, et cetera. We know it’s not good for us. We don’t even want to read the label because we can’t read it, it’s all chemicals, it’s inpronounceable, but we use it anyways. Why? “Well, I have a bottle, and it’s still half-way full, so I’ll wait until the bottle’s empty, knowing that that’s going to take a few months of putting chemicals in your scalp.” Or, “oh, I don’t have time order something else. Oh, I don’t have the money to. Oh, make it your own, do it yourself thing is too hard, too time-consuming.”

Probably you have some apple cider vinegar and coconut oil at your house. If you don’t, those are things that you should definitely get. They’re super cheap, you can buy a huge tub. You’re going to use it for everything. That’s all you need. Apple cider vinegar to wash your hair, coconut oil to moisturize it. That’s really all you need. People are shocked when I say I wash my hair every two weeks. Your scalp actually doesn’t need it. Shampoo is a totally synthetically created product that makes you reliant on those soaps. But what the problem really is, is the exposure to chemicals that you’re putting in your body every single day that you don’t realize is decreasing your vibes.

You would never eat those products, you would never pour Head & Shoulders into your mouth, would you? But when we’re putting it into our skin, we don’t notice the difference. We think, oh, it’s just in my skin, I’m not ingesting it. Not knowing that your skin actually ingests things more straightly into your bloodstream than if you were to put it in your mouth. Because your digestive system has blocks, has blockers, and it knows when something is a potential pathogen, which means something that’s dangerous.

So you know, at least 30% of it, it can block. Whereas when you put something in your skin, there’s no barriers like your stomach acid has. There’s no barriers, it goes straight into your bloodstream, so it’s actually more detrimental. So if we went and talk about cancer and things like that, it’s actually more related to body products than anything else. Food for sure is related to cancer, but body products is like the huge one that people don’t talk about as much. All of that’s decreasing your vibration.

The third thing, which I have a whole podcast episode about, are your DMs, your Instagram messages, and then also just your e-mails. You know, when we’re checking them all the time, it ruins our vibration because we could be vibrating super high, and then we check an e-mail, and it’s like it doesn’t even need to be negative, it’s just something you have to do. And then you’re like, “Ugh,” and you’re thinking about it, and you’re not present anymore, and it’s on the back of your mind. I need to respond to this person, I need to do this task, I need to do this thing. And you’re decreasing your vibration, when in reality, you know if you’re about to go to a yoga class, what’s the point of checking your e-mail right before when you know you’re not going to be able to respond to them.

So check your e-mails—this is something I need to tell myself to do—check your e-mails at a time that you can just respond to them all. And what sucks is that a lot of us when we work for ourselves, we need to be on our e-mails all the time cause there’s always new things coming through. So it’s hard. Like I personally cannot delete my e-mails from my phone because there are days that I don’t go on my laptop, and I totally run my business on my phone. But it’s not having that relationship of, you know, checking your phone. An average person’s checking their phone over 150 times a day. Not checking your phone to that level, having, you know, maybe you check it in the morning, maybe you check it in the afternoon and then in the evening. I think three times a day is like you’re doing a good job. But 100 times a day is you’re creating anxiety and decreasing your vibration.

And the same thing with DMs, Instagram messages. A lot of people are, you know, trying to sell their business, telling this ,telling that. DMs have just turned into a spam filter. You know, so many people they’ll send some random DM about their new product and tag 100 people in it. And you’re constantly bombarded with these things. And when you’re just always on this like barricade, and blocking out this, and blocking out that, it’s decreasing your vibration. So like setting those same regulations that you would have with e-mails on DMs and any other social media, that you have.

For me, as I talked about, I use Facebook Newsfeed Eradicator that I don’t have a Facebook newsfeed. I just go on it, I go straight into my “Mind Body Balancers” group. That’s the only thing I want to see on Facebook. Amazing, high vibe people, positive conversations, support, loving each other. You guys are all invited to join the group, I’ll post the link in the info in the podcast notes. But I don’t want to see what’s going on with Trump. I don’t want to see all this negative fear-based stuff that’s just bringing us down, and I can’t do anything about it.

That’s the thing. Like I studied international relations, I was all about politics. My whole high school career was me going to protests and being angry about this, and being angry about that. But it doesn’t help anyone me screaming at the top of my lungs how horrible the U.S. government is isn’t what’s going to change the U.S. government. It’s by me increasing my vibration and creating a positive impact, creating a community like with all of you guys. This is how we’re changing the country. Like the government has never helped us, and probably it’s not going to any time soon.

So let’s give up that dependence on someone else to save us, and start saving ourselves. Because we can change our own realities by changing our vision. So no new law or regulation or the parliament is not going to save your life. Only you can save your life. And do you know what’s so empowering about that? It’s that you don’t have to wait for anyone else. You can just start right now. I think that’s amazing.

So the next one, which I also talked about in the “Karma and Kriya” episode is judgment, as well as gossip. Little things, little gossipy comments that we make with our friends, like “Oh, did you see what so-and-so’s wearing?” Or like, “Oh, did they get a divorce?” Or like, “Oh wow, like she’s not married yet?” Or I don’t know, little things like that. People say it all the time. It’s considered normal, and people even frame it in a way that it seems nice. Like, “Oh, did you hear about so-and-so’s divorce? Like poor thing.” Why are we even talking about their divorce? It’s none of your business. It’s not necessary. And you know, even by saying the “poor thing” after, it still has the negative vibration to it.

Because you’re still not saying it out of a place of love and compassion, but it’s a place of bringing something up that makes you feel superior. And that is the most low vibration thing on earth, because we are all the same, we are all equally as important. We’re born with different gifts, but we’re equally as important. Every single person has the same rights, the same heart, the same love, and we cannot judge anyone else for choosing a different life path as us. Even if spirituality is not included and they eat steak every day. That’s their choice, we cannot judge.

So every time we’re judging, every time we’re gossiping, we’re lowering our vibration, and decreasing the probability f us having these beautiful synchronicities happen to us. Of us achieving our own dharma. So really, if you want to help yourself, it’s not by putting someone else down, it’s by letting them be, sending love, you don’t need to tell them, and text them, and send them love. Send it from your heart, and continue on your path, and be the best person that you can be.

The fifth thing I want to talk about is overeating. Overeating is something that a lot of us people with kapha properties do. Oh my gosh, if I find something delicious, I will go to town with it. And while you’re doing it, you realize that you’re actually not being conscious at all. For me, when I overeat, I’m on my computer at the same time. I’m always on my computer working, and I’m like more chocolate, more avocado mousse, more whatever it is. And I just keep going, and going, and going, and it’s my mind is trying to get me to, you know, not be conscious about it so I keep eating. It’s like this little trick, like oh, if I’m not fully conscious, then it doesn’t count. Whereas if I’m just sitting down and enjoying it, then maybe I’m even going to get bored because I don’t want to just sit and eat chocolate for hours. That I won’t do it.

So overeating is:

• Lack of mind-body connection, which decreases your vibration

• It’s filling your body with more food than it needs

• Not listening to yourself

• Thinking that you can buy your own happiness with food when that doesn’t work

• It’s not addressing the root cause of what is causing your uncomfortability at that moment

• What are you trying to get away from?

• Do you want to get away from your work?

• Why don’t you just lie down on the floor?

• Do you want to spend some time outside, go outside.

But eating coconut yogurt to the face with honey on it, that can be great sometimes, but it’s not the same as giving yourself a break. So we really need to distinguish the difference. And it’s hard because going outside requires time, which is something that we don’t all don’t want to give up on because it’s our most precious commodity. But do you know how much time you’re going to spend after overeating just being guilty about it and having a stomachache, and being uncomfortable, and being less productive? A lot more than it would have taken for you to go outside.

So overeating every time we do, it’s decreasing our vibration, making us less of this beautiful light ray being that we are, and what it really is, is it’s kind of self-sabotage. It’s in a way saying like, “Oh, you’re not there yet. You don’t have everything that you need, so you need more.” You need to fill your body up with something that does not exist inside of you so you can become whole again. Because without food, you’re incomplete.

And that is something that no amount of Cinnamon Toast Crunch can fulfill. You are already complete. Sometimes it takes work to keep that puzzle tidy because the pieces can become loose. But if every time an emotion comes that you don’t want to face, you run away from it with eating brownies, and chips, even if they’re lentil chips, or Siete Foods, or whatever else. That issue’s still going to be there, and that hole is just going to get deeper and deeper and wider and wider, and it’s just going to take more food to fill it out.

So do you want to run away from your problems and fill them up with a never-ending spoon of, you know, raw vegan cookie dough? Or do you want to fulfill it with what it’s really lacking in:

• Love

• Nurture

• Ritual

• Ceremony

• Nature

And then eat those foods as your own ceremony of self-love, not lack. So overeating, decreasing our vibration.

So the sixth thing I want to talk about are white lies. So, white lies decrease our vibration because we all do them, multiple times a day. I was at Russell Simmons’ yoga talk probably a week or two ago, and he has a Tantris yoga studio in Hollywood, and every month they choose an aspect of yoga. So this time it was like SOT, to be truthful, to not tell lies. And he was saying that he has read that the average person tells about two to three white lies a day.

So a white life can be the littlest thing. It can be like, “oh yeah, like I’m really great friends with so-and-so, when like you’ve literally never met them.” And it’s like not harmful, but it’s just why would you make that up? Or like, “oh yeah, like I don’t know, like I saw this person at this party,” and you didn’t see them. I’m just trying to think of random examples. There are so many white lies that we do. We tell someone that we’re  busy with something else, even though we just don’t want to go. Or we, you know, just make up excuses for things that we don’t want to own up to. There’s so many little white lies that it’s hard to even think about because they’re so ingrained in us. That we don’t even realize we’re white lying. We just think like, oh, that’s just how you respond to situations that you don’t want to give an answer to.

But all of that is going against the principle of SOT, truth. When you’re not truthful, the lie becomes heavy even if it’s something super small. And that heaviness plagues you down. It decreases your vibration. It’s like a heavy backpack you’re holding onto. Because every time you create a lie, in your mind, it’s a stress-causer because your mind is like, oh crap, now I need to remember this lie because otherwise the whole story’s going to fall apart. So it starts building its story to, you know, keep the lie going on. And that’s a mental distresser, and that’s keeping you from thinking of higher thoughts and having higher vibration, and being more connected to spiritual source.

And then out of that you become caught in a circle of lies. And then maybe that thing comes up again, and then your body goes into fight or flight. Oh shit, I forgot about that lie. Damn, now I have to think about what I said, and I have to add more to it, and people continue to add more and more lies. Like I knew people that they lied about everything, to the point that they didn’t even realize they were lying. I don’t think that they knew the difference between truth and lie at this point. Because lying was a way that they went about life. It was their way of pleasing people.

And I think we all know someone like that. Someone who wants to keep a cool face, or make sure everyone’s happy with them so they just keep lying, keep lying. But eventually, of course the truth always, always, always comes out. And then that person is just left like looking like a total idiot, and they just feel even worse about themselves because they don’t even know when the lie started. For some people it started when they were like five years old.

So if you know you’re one of those people that, you know, most of us I don’t think listening are pathological liars like that, but a lot of us tell little lies. Little things, “oh yeah, I went to that yoga class,” when you didn’t. What is the purpose of saying that? There’s really no purpose, that other person you’re talking to is not going to change their opinion of you, they’re not going to think higher of you, there’s no point, just be truthful in everything that you do, and your life will become more truthful to you; SOT.

The seventh thing I want to talk about is overreacting. So overreacting really any negative emotion is an overreaction. Because life throws thing at us, and you know, we have a choice, we either deal with it or we can overreact to it as another way of dealing with it, but it’s there. It’s something we have to face. Now overreacting can be anger, it can be sadness, it can be anxiety, but it’s all overreacting. When you’re overreacting, you’re choosing to take whatever emotion that one could feel that naturally comes up, of course you’re going to have emotions, I’m not telling you to become Buddhist and have no emotions at all. Have the emotion, just don’t overreact to it.

Overreacting is someone canceled plans on you. Oh my god, you canceled plans with me, you ruined my whole entire schedule. Like I had a friend like this. Oh my god, it was hard to make plans with them because every time you did, you were like, “oh crap, like what if something happens and I can’t fulfill it? This person’s going to give me like the hardest time in the world” that you become fearful of that person. And when you overreact, it doesn’t feel good, it feels really icky. Because it’s like getting caught in a web of lies. It’s creating a larger response that you need, and the only way that your body can deal with lies and overreaction is if it starts to believe it.

So someone cancels plans on you. “Oh wow, I mean I cleared up my schedule for you from like two weeks ago, and I was really looking forward to spending time with you, and now you’re going to cancel plans on me? Like wow, like wish you would have let me know sooner, but I think it’ll be okay. But like next time, please don’t cancel plans on me.” Like verbatim, like some people that I know.

Like that is coming from a place of love, and light, and understanding, but really, is it? No. That person might be explaining themselves to you, but they’re overreacting about the whole situation. And when you’re like water,  life falls into flow. If you’re that person that overreacts, bring down that pitta, cause it’s always pitta-related. Life moves, and life never ever, ever goes as planned, and thank god for that. Because if it went as planned, I think we would all be ballerinas and astronauts, and no one would be left on planet earth. So thank god.

But life never goes as planned, and that’s the beauty of it because we don’t know what to expect, and life would suck if we knew everything that was going to happen. There would be nothing left to live for, it’s like oh, here’s my entire life. Like might as well just sit on idle and keep watching it. No. And the more we’re able to roll with the punches, and go with the flow, and become like waves, and be going towards our direction, but maybe the wave moves a little bit to the right or to the left, or it doesn’t ebb and flow at the speed that we had imagined, and that’s all okay. It’s all okay.

And when it comes to dealing with other people, that’s a whole other ballgame cause that’s their dharma, their path, their life goals, their spirit guides, all of that. So you totally cannot control another person. Like controlling yourself, you can do more and more with practices, you can kind of trace your own steps and create your own pathway. Even that’s not guaranteed, but you can try. Another person? No. That’s like zero control. Even if they’re your husband. Zero—that’s probably even less, negative zero control.

But every single person has their own things that work best for them, and sometimes when something doesn’t work out, you were supposed to meet up with that friend and they canceled, it’s because you were supposed to stay home and be with yourself. It’s because maybe they were supposed to stay home and be with themselves. It’s because it wasn’t for the greater desire of the universe. It wasn’t meant to be.

Maybe you were supposed to meet another time when, you know, something happened to them later on that week that it would have been a perfect thing to talk about. Or maybe you needed to meet up with a different friend. Maybe that person had work, maybe you had work. There are a bazillion reasons, and we can’t sit and think about all of them. You just have to roll with it. Oh, can’t hang out, okay, wish I could have seen you, but no problem, let me know when you’re free. Done. Halas. Finished.

And the more water we evoke in our lives, the more life will flow. Because you don’t want life to occur to you like a pile of bricks falling from the sky. Like big opportunity, next opportunity, go, go, go, don’t hit your head. Then it’s going to be like, you know, a crossfit class, and we’re not looking for that out of our whole lives.

• We’re trying to create water

• We’re trying to create flow

• We’re trying to create longevity

• We’re trying to create interconnectedness

• We’re trying to create cooperation

• And collaboration

• And conglomeration

And all the “co” words we’re trying to create, co-create. That can be my rap.

But we have to create that flow in our lives if we want our lives to be rolling that way. Cause if your life is “I scheduled you on Tuesday at 9:00 PM and you’re not here, I’m so upset at you, how come you don’t respect my time? Pitta, pitta, pitta, pitta, pitta.” Then life is going to throw life at you that way, and you’re going to end up working and becoming friends with other people that treat you that way, and then you’re going to realize how shitty it feels, and then it’s going to be a huge mirror opportunity because you’re going to notice that you went your whole life playing by the rules instead of surrendering to the flow of the universe with your own path at heart, but rolling with the flow.

So overreacting, overreacting anger, being rigid in your beliefs. Overreacting sad, you know, things happen that suck, things happen that are heartbreaking. Break-ups happen, children die, all of these things happen. And I’m not saying that the world is a perfect place, because it’s not, and it wasn’t meant to be. Because if there’s only light, there cannot be shadow, and if there’s only yin, there cannot be yang, and we have to have the balance of both. So it’s letting go of our overreaction.

The love of your life—or so you thought—leaves you. How do you choose to react to that? Do you choose to say, “he’s gone, he was my life, therefore I no longer have a life.” So I might as well stay home, stop seeing my friends, eat all the cake and pudding in the world, give up on social life, trying new things, anything else that made me who I was, and made me that person that he fell in love with because he is gone.” Well, do you know what? You’re going to fall out of love with yourself, and that is way more damaging than someone else falling out of love with you.

Because if you’re not that person that they fell in love with, you’re also not being that person that you fell in love with. So letting go of yourself, and overreacting and saying, “life’s not worth it if you’re not here.” It’s only going to keep you down in the gutters. But, taking it’s not a break-up, it’s a separation, it’s a parting two ways, it’s a beautiful path of two roads that were brought together for a period of time, and now it’s time for them to go their own ways. It’s a beautiful time of rebirth. That’s what it is.

And when you say, yes, they were a soul mate of mine, and they were brought to my life for a reason to teach me the lessons that my soul needed for its highest evolvement. I learned compassion, I learned patience, it filled me up with love and light, and it made me a better person for those years. And now, it’s time for us to continue on those paths, and take those baggages full of the love that we gave each other, and carry forward. And eventually, another person will come into our lives that teaches us the next set of rules that our soul needs for our highest evolvement.

And each person comes into your life to teach you a lesson, and that lesson may take a day, and that lesson may take 20 years. And for some, that lesson takes a lifetime because its’ not a lesson, it’s a continual growth, and they’re your twin flame. Cause the way I see twin flame is like the way that I’d learned in, you know, sacred vadic tantra and things like that is that your twin flame is the balance of you in the feminine/masculine form. So I know in more new age stuff it’s like kind of the opposite, and the twin flame is just someone that like sparks out the worst of you. But in the vadic historical tradition, your twin flame is someone that you were meant to be with. Because to be together you must be whole.

But if you don’t evolve, and you don’t do the self-work, that’s when things become, you know, sparklers in a bad way, and they just push all your butt ins, and bring out the worst in you, and you’re fighting all the time, but you love each other, and you feel like they’re your twin flame, but it can’t work out because you guys piss each other off more than anyone else. That means you haven’t done the work. That means you both are not at your highest selves because one person a their highest self can only be with another person at their highest self. It can’t work that way.

Someone at their highest self cannot be with someone that bogs them down. So maybe the separation happened because you’re vibrating higher. Maybe you have found your path. Maybe you’ve evolved more spiritually, and they have chosen not to wake up to their own greatness. And that’s not your job. Because only you can elevate yourself. And by elevating yourself, you can share out of the goodness of your heart and say, “hey babe, I want you to come with me to this yoga class. Hey babe, let’s start meditating together everyday. Hey, I’d love to go to this vegan place with you. Hey, like maybe we should stay home and like watch a documentary.” You can do all that stuff. That’s amazing.

But it’s their choice to take it to heart or not. You can expose it to them, just like you can give your kid healthy food, and they can eat it or they cannot, but you can’t shove it down their throats. So all you can do is keep on vibrating on your highest level, share the gifts, and if they don’t want to receive it, maybe it’s not aligned anymore. Maybe before you weren’t where you are right now—because if you’re listening to this podcast right now, you’re elevating, and you’re on the rollercoaster of elevation. And it’s an awesome one because you’re up leveling by the moment, and every time you remove

• walking through the alley

• the body products

• the horrible DMs and e-mails

• the gossip

• the judgment

• the overeating

• the white lies

• the overreacting.

Every time you do these things, your vibration’s increasing. And trust me, it’s hard. It is hard to find someone who’s vibrating at your level because the world is not filled with these kind of people. It’s hard for men, and it’s hard for women—equally as hard. We always hear it’s so hard for women to find men. It’s also really hard for men to find women because men can’t expose this side of them as much as women can. We have mood circles, and yoga gatherings, and this, and that. And we can talk about it openly, and now it’s become a trend to have crystals, and be spiritual, and this like very, very you know, kind of pop culture way, but at least it’s a trend. But for men, it’s a lot more in the closet. So a lot of men that you might come across may have a very deep spiritual practice, and you’d not know about it.

So, again, it’s letting go of your beliefs how life is supposed to be, how your partner is supposed to be, but looking at them for their vibration. How do they make you feel? How aligned is it? Yeah, they might not be six feet tall, but is that what matters to you more than having a soul connection? And if you’re looking for your love— and I’ll do a whole other episode about that, because it’s my favorite topic—but if you’re looking for love, you need to love yourself. And I know that sounds so cliché, but it really all comes form within.

And the more you do this work, the more you listen to this podcast and do the practices—not just listen,

• you go home

• and you think about these things

• and you do them

• and you listen to other podcasts

• and you meditate

• and you go out there

• and you go on Meetup

• and you go meet random other people

the more you do this stuff, the closer that twin flame soul connection calling will be. And probably, he or she is on your periphery right now, and it just takes that one little switch you need to make. Maybe it’s just not walking through that alley anymore. And that’s what’s going to change the game for you.

And once you find it, it will never be the same. Like oh I’m going to do another episode about how I met my boyfriend, but really, it was a total testament to be being like, you know what, I am so complete with who I am, and I do have space in my heart for a partner calling one in, but it doesn’t need to be now, it can be years from now. It can be when I’m 70 years old. As long as I experience that level of love, and a month later he came. So, I’ll do another episode on that because it’s juicy.

Overreacting, sadness, anger, all of these things decrease our vibration. And the last point that I want to talk about, the eighth point, is watching television. So there are different ways that we can watch TV. There is the way of dulling yourself, and there’s the way of educating and inspiring yourself. And I’m not talking about the latter, I’m talking about the former. Watching TV because you came home and it’s an easier way of relaxing than getting on the floor and doing some stretches. Watching TV because there’s so much going on in your life that you don’t want to deal with that it’s easier to worry about someone else’s problems. It’s easier to think about what’s khaleesi doing. I’ve never even watched this show, everyone’s talking about it. That is the kind of TV-watching that’s going to decrease your vibration.

Now some people, they generally love cinematography, they love theater, they love the theatrics that go behind moviemaking, and that’s not decreasing your vibration. That’s watching it from a place of wow, I’m feeling inspired. Or wow, this story is, you know, bringing up emotions, and making me think more about my own life, and think about all human relations. You can watch the same exact thing in two different ways and it has a totally different vibratory experience on you. But watching something and the show’s over, and you’re like okay, next? Keep going, keep going, keep going, dull, dull, dull, dull. What it is, is escapism. And when you’re escaping from yourself, everything that you want is going to escape from you, too.

How can you attract love and success and happiness and joy when you’re trying to run away from yourself? If you’re not on your path, you’re going to want to numb yourself. If you’re on a career path that does not make you excited, you’re going to want to turn on the TV and think about someone else’s career path because you don’t want to face your own. I had a friend of mine that she was applying for dental school. Now this girl was not meant to be a dentist. She wasn’t a very like, you know you have to be really good with your hands to be a dentist, you have to be very like hygienic, an patient, and working with all these people. Like there’s a personality for a dentist, and hers was not that.

But her dad was a dentist, her sister was a dentist, her whole life she grew up saying that she was going to be a dentist. So now it’s time for her to study for her dental exams, her DATs, and she doesn’t want to do it. So she’s watching every single show you can imagine, and she’s just numbing herself, and she’s just trying to go out, go to parties, meet people, go to lunch, go to breakfast, go to dinner just so she doesn’t have to be home and face that textbook. For her, these things are a break, but really what she wants a break from is her whole entire life. Because she’s not going towards the career path that was meant for her. And no amount of “Game of Thrones” is going to give you enough of a break to come back and face a future that is not yours. You can’t number yourself to that.

So if that’s you, if you’re that person who watches shows as a way of not dealing with the reality of your own life—so you’d rather deal with Kim Kardashian, which also isn’t real life. Get a journal, sit down, and start writing in it. And you don’t have to know what you’re going to say, but just stat writing something. Start writing the script of your own life. Because if you don’t take that pen and paper, someone else will. And they will begin to write the script of their story, and figure out a way for you to play a small role in it. And you will live your life as the side character, rather than the lead. And who wants to be the side character in their own damn feature film?

Take control of your life. If you don’t, life will take control of you. Anything you do that is numbing yourself is lowering your vibration. Anything you do that is an escape— alcohol, drugs— it’s lowering your vibration. There’s no purpose for any of this. Because when you are whole, these substances, these movies, horror films—oh my god, I could do a whole podcast episode about how it’s so damaging for your vibes. But all of these things are keeping you from your highest path. Now again, it’s not never do it again if you still feel called to do it. I’m just letting you know, as your vibration increases, you as your own choice, will not want to.

You will wake up one day, and you will drink that morning coffee, and you’re going to be like, “Oh, this is a stimulant, and this is actually not making me feel like myself. This is making me feel like a sped up version of myself. And I don’t want this anymore. I want to be exactly who I am, right now, at this time.” And that’s why people don’t drink coffee. Coffee, it messes with your subtle energy body. It’s like taking fuel from your reserve—extra fuel at this time—but it’s taking away from your fuel later on. So you feel more energy now, but it’s depleting from your jar. And that’s not what we want, and that’s why anyone who’s on a yogic path, monk path, any of these things, one of the first things they have to do is decrease coffee.

Again, maybe that’s not your path, and maybe you don’t want to, you don’t have to, it’s so what you want. Maybe you want to keep on watching movies, maybe you don’t want to live up to your own potential. And you don’t need to. Not everyone wants to. Some people rather live in the comfortness of their own dullness. They rather choose a tamasic life. Tamas, I describe it in the book. It’s inertia, it’s stillness. But life was not meant to be lived that way. We were meant to live from a place of sattva, clarity, purity, truth. And this can only happen when our prana, our life force, the breath that goes through us, the vibration between our atoms, is truly flowing and our vibes are high. And this increases ojas, which is that lust. That pink cheek glow, that beautiful look that a baby has that’s just like yes, I’m alive. We want ojas. And when we decrease our vibration, we’re decreasing our potential to have the future that we were meant to have.

So it can start with something as little as not walking through the alley, which I learned my lesson. And eventually, as you continue you’ll realize that you’ve changed your whole entire life. Namaste.

Episode 028 – Little Things That Are Lowering Your Vibration