One day I was going down a gua sha rabbit hole and looked up the hashtag to come across this beautiful girl teaching facial reflexology practices. I saw she lived in Miami and we ended up meeting up and have been close friends ever since!

In this episode, I sit down with Liliana, founder of Wild Lily Organics, to discuss how facial reflexology can be a path of self-love and healing. She shares what really happens to the facial muscles with botox and I ask her about different natural alternatives.

We then dive into sacred sensuality and how her skin was actually telling her there was deeper healing needed in her womb space. We talk about the need for intergenerational connection and the times of the Red Tent when womben gathered. We then discuss our personal experiences through taking Improv together for the past few months and how it’s been the ultimate embodiment practice!

If you are one that walks the beauty path, you will love this episode.

Connect with Liliana and get her gua sha tools at https://www.wildlilyorganics.com

Liliana is a teacher in Rose Gold Goddesses, my sacred feminine mystery school. If you are looking for a nourishing community of like-minded souls I’d love to invite you to join the waitlist of Rose Gold Goddesses at https://rosegoldgoddesses.com

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Transcript

Episode #474: Walking the beauty path, The Truth About Botox, Sacred Sensuality + Improv as an embodiment practice with Liliana Cruz
By Sahara Rose

[00:00] Liliana

That’s my message that I want women to take, is to look at beauty not just for what you see in the surface, but really look inward and work on the internal imbalances, work on creating homeostasis from within, work on finding deep where is the imbalance coming from, and working on that, vs. trying to fix it with a cream, trying to fix it with something, like, it comes from within. Beauty truly does, and that’s what it taught me.

[00:34] Sahara

Hello, hello! I’m Sahara Rose and welcome back to The Highest Self Podcast, a place where we discuss what makes you, your soul’s, highest evolvement.

[00:43] Sahara

This Podcast is really all about taking spirituality and making it grounded, fun, sacred feminine, joyful. I believe that expression and creativity are the pathways to your highest self. And I walk the path of beauty, here to make my surroundings in the world a more beautiful place.

[01:03] Sahara

And today’s Episode is truly a reflection of that, with one of my close friends, Liliana, who is the founder of Wild Lily Organics. You may have seen her on social media, she teaches beautiful Gua Sha and facial reflexology tips, but also goes so much deeper into how self-care is related to our sacred sensuality, our inner Goddess wisdom, as well as our creativity and joy.

[01:27] Sahara

So, she has such an incredible story of coming to this country with nothing, from Colombia, and facing many different hardships. She had her daughter at a young age and even experienced different time periods of her life where she did not have a home or a place to sleep, but found self-care and a way to connect with her divine feminine nature, even despite all of the challenges that she was experiencing. 

[01:53] Sahara

And she lived in a world where women are not taught to love themselves, women are taught to see other women as competition and believe that they’re not worthy. And she was able to, not only overcome this for herself, but help create a movement of other women finding their inner beauty. 

[02:10] Sahara

So, I share my story of how we met each other on the Podcast, but I love this conversation because it really is such a reflection of everything that I’m about and this Podcast stands for. All about not seeing spirituality as this thing you need to, like, master and figure out in the mind and be so, like, disciplined and structured and figure it all out, but rather, enjoying this human experience, enjoying the fact that we can create art through anything in life. 

[02:37] Sahara

So, in this Episode, we dive into facial reflexology and Gua Sha, we get even deeper into the red tent, the need for intergenerational, female relationships and sister circle, and we also talk about our journey together, doing improv, because her and I have been doing improv together for the past couple of months and it has been the ultimate embodiment practice. So, we also discuss more of how this practice has been shape-shifting us to evolve as even deeper expressions of the sacred feminine. 

[03:08] Sahara

So, without further ado, let’s welcome Liliana, to The Highest Self Podcast. 

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[03:13] Advertisement

 So, in my own spiritual journey of really honoring the sacred feminine energy within me, I realized that we’re not all the same and we all have different pathways that we can take, that I put together in creating five archetypes, which I call The Rose Gold Goddess Archetypes. They are The Embodiment Queen, The Womb Whisperer, The Intuitive Oracle, The Expressionista and The Joy Priestess. And I’ve put together a free quiz so you can find out what your unique combinations are.

So, The Embodiment Queen is the person who is always in her body, dancing, moving, very connected to her nervous system. The Womb Whisperer always knows where she’s at with her menstrual cycle and probably has a yoni steamer in her bathroom. The Intuitive Oracle has three oracle card decks, on them a pendulum, and knows about their past lives. The Expressionista is creating art through everything, through singing, dancing, writing poetry, everything for her is an opportunity to create art. And then we’ve got The Joy Priestess who wants to laugh, dance and not take herself super seriously. You can find her doing karaoke at an improv class or twerking it on the dance floor (you can guess which one I am). 

So, you can head over to rggquiz.com to learn what your unique Rose Gold Goddess Archetype is. Again, that’s rggquiz.com and you can find that link in the show notes. And I’ve created custom graphics that you get in your results so you can share which Rose Gold Goddess Archetype you are. I’m super excited to see! 

[04:45] End of Advertisement

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[04:46] Interview

[04:46] Sahara

Welcome, Liliana, to The Highest Self Podcast, it’s so great to have you here!

[04:50] Liliana

Thank you for having me! It’s an honor, really! 

[04:53] Sahara

Long time coming! So, the first question I would love to ask you is, what makes you your highest self? 

[05:00] Liliana

So, that’s a great question! What makes me my highest self is doing what I love. And one of the things that I really love to do is help women, empower them through beauty and help them remember their true beauty is their divinity.

[05:12] Sahara

And you do it through so many different modalities that we’re going to get into! 

So, we met over a year ago now, like a year and a half ago. I went to a day-breaker and okay, no. Here’s actually how I found you before that – I was like, on this Gua Sha kick and I was like “I need to learn everything about Gua Sha”, so I literally looked at #guasha on Instagram, just to like see a bunch of videos, and I somehow saw your video and I just clicked on it, and it said location – Miami, and I was like “Oh, wow, she lives in Miami, I have like no friends here, let me reach out to her”. And then I reached out to you and then I told you, I was like “Hey, tomorrow, or like a few days later, I’m going to this day-breaker, like sober conscious dance thing, do you want to come?”, and you came and it was your birthday that day, so we, like, spent your birthday together and then we’re just like sisters ever since! 

[06:05] Liliana

Ever since! Like non-stop, like, let’s go!

[06:07] Sahara

Yeah, we, like, hang out every single day and do improv together, which we’ll get into.

[06:11] Liliana

Oh my God! 

[06:11] Sahara

Yeah!

[06:12] Liliana

It’s been a really cool rollercoaster the minute you came into my life, so, it’s been awesome! Thank you for reaching out!

[06:21] Sahara

So, we were thinking, today, to do a bunch of accents, since we’re improv actors here! 

[06:26] Liliana

We did, which one are we going to go?

[06:28] Sahara

You can just, we can just float around with different accents and see how it goes.

[06:32] Liliana

Russian – want me to talk a bit in Russian?

[06:35] Sahara

Yes, because that’s your to go to.

[06:37] Liliana

It’s a very nice one!

[06:38 – 06:42] Sahara

Inaudible

[06:43] Sahara

So, art, expression, divine feminine, beauty, it’s all connected.

[06:48] Liliana

Yes!

[06:49] Sahara

You know, and people I feel like, the more they get into their spiritual path, you know, it’s not even about spirit, it’s not even about leaving the body, it’s about, like, being integrated in it.

So, can you tell us a little bit more about how you embarked on this feminine approach to spirituality?

[07:03] Liliana

Yes, thank you for asking that. And it’s, you’re right on the money, it’s so true. Like, we’re always looking for, I think, like, an out-of-body experience to feel the feminine, but the feminine is here, now, in your body, and that’s what facial reflexology really taught me, to go inward.

You know, I was looking for the answers outside of me and they were all within me, and it really taught me more presence, it taught me to go more inward, it taught me to sit down with myself, feel the emotions, feel everything and not avoid things. So, it really did bring me back into my feminine flow of feeling and being just, like, in that present moment.

[07:44] Sahara

And I always tell people, like, I used to think that being spiritual is about being a very good person, right? Then I thought it’s like, be a very true, like be truth, truth, truth, and now, I’m like, it’s all about bringing beauty to the world, because what is the point of life without beauty, you know? Because if we’re just constantly trying to fix things and make it better or like spread the truth, we’re creating separation.

[08:10] Liliana

Yes.

[08:10] Sahara

And ultimately, the world is never going to be perfect, we’re never going to solve all of the problems in humanity within ourselves, but little acts of beauty and ritual and sacredness, which is everything that you stand for, is how we inspire people to do more good and to be more truthful and to be more honest, instead of forcing them to do it, we’re inspiring it within themselves. 

So, can you tell us a little bit about, just the act of facial reflexology and Gua Sha, as a way to connect back with your self-love?

[08:42] Liliana

Yes. So, that’s, again, that really did bring me to where I am now, facial Gua Sha, facial reflexology. I didn’t know it at the time, until, again, I started to give myself the self-love, and really, intentionally, because when I learned with Dr. Ping Zhang, facial Gua Sha from a Chinese doctor, and then I learned facial reflexology from traditional Chinese medicine and Vietnamese medicine, they were all very intentional, they were all about the intention, not doing it aimlessly, like, really working with the intention. It was like, that was like, if I could take anything away from Rick’s facial reflexology and Gua Sha, was that. And it was like “Wow”, it just transformed my vision of beauty, on how I touch myself and how I look at myself in the mirror, it just started to shift a whole, like, perspective inside of me that I started to look at beauty in a whole different view and whole different lens. And I feel like that’s my message I want women to take, is to look at beauty for not just what you see in the surface, but really go inward and work on the internal imbalances, work on creating a homeostasis from within, work on finding where is the imbalance coming from, and working on that, vs. trying to fix it with a cream, trying to fix it with something, like, it comes from within. Beauty truly does, and that’s what it taught me.

[09:57] Sahara

And one of the things I love learning from you is how our faces are such a representation of our energy. And you can, like, read so much about someone from the face, and you know, from where they have blemishes and how it’s related to you know – and you can share with us more about, like, the hormonals on the chin, but also, you were reading my face once and I was like…And just like little things like that, which is so interesting because in many ancient cultures, they have face reading. And every time, like, for me, when someone tells me a story about someone, I’m like “Can you show me a picture”, because it’s only until I see their face, that I can really read their energy and understand who they are. 

So, can you tell us, first of all, a little bit about how, maybe, our skin is a reflection of different hormonal, digestive, reproductive issues going on?

[10:43] Liliana

Yeah. So, definitely, the skin is (or the face) the microsystem of the entire body. So, we can find specific points that relate to certain body parts, like the reproductive system, it’s the upper lip, the nose and around the eyes, it’s the ovaries. The digestive system, it’s the whole lower part of the face. The respiratory system is like the upper part of the face. And each organ has an emotion that’s attached to it. 

So, it’s just, it’s a really deep work, it’s not superficial, it’s not like a quick fix, it’s not – like, I’ve talked about this many times, it’s like, I like to peel the layers and really see where it stems from and look at the person’s history, look at the person’s past, look at the person, like what are they going through at this exact moment. Because, although they may be experiencing breakouts right due to hormones, but it could be due to their digestive system that’s causing the hormonal imbalance because if you’re not digesting your hormones, you’re not digesting your food properly, it’s going to affect your hormones. 

[11:37] Sahara

Absolutely. And yeah, I think it’s such a beautiful way of getting to know yourself. And also, even, like, swelling and noticing like “Okay, when I ate these certain foods, I’m more swollen”. 

So, can you share a little bit about how Gua Sha can support with just stimulating your lymphatic drainage system?

[11:56] Liliana

Yeah. So, Facial Gua Sha and Gua Sha, just, they’re two different things, and that’s one thing I like to cover because there’s a lot of people who have a misconception on Gua Sha. So, body Gua Sha is done on the body, and you scrape to reduce, or remove the blood stagnation, right. And Facial Gua Sha is a combination of different facial rejuvenating modalities such as Myofascial release, lymphatic drainage, muscle tension release and increasing the blood flow, of course. 

So, with lymphatic drainage in Gua Sha, the beauty of it is that you can really stimulate the lymphatic flow and open up the pathways and release tension and promote more homeostasis, improve the blood flow, chi flow, energy flow. It’s not just the blood flow and lymph flow that we’re working with, we’re working also with your energy flow, because we’re opening up the channels, we’re opening up the meridians, we’re opening up the neck, where we hold a lot of stagnation, just from our improper posture, from being on our phones. So, by working on the neck, it’s opening up the pathways and energy to flow and blood to flow to the surface of the skin as well.

[12:52] Sahara

Something I learned from you is that you should always start with your neck.

[12:55] Liliana

Yes.

[12:56] Sahara

Because I see a lot of people, and also use one hand to hold the skin, because I see a lot of people, they’re just, kind of, like, doing it – I used to just do it with one hand and I also thought the firmer, the better, because I’m like working the muscles. And what you taught me was, starting with the neck and you know, really draining that. 

So, can you share a little bit about how, like, what are the optimal ways, some tips for doing facial Gua Sha?

[13:18] Liliana

Yeah, thank you for asking that. So, definitely, it’s important to start with the neck because the neck is the root stem, it’s what’s holding the face up, right? So, by releasing any tension that we have in our neck, we’re improving the overall help for the skin. So, if you have any stagnation on the neck, you’re going to have stagnation of blood, stagnation of metabolic waste. So, it is important to start on the neck, especially on the back of the neck and then to the front of the neck. And really like – so, we were talking about holding the tool in different directions, there’s so many different techniques with facial Gua Sha. Again, you can promote lymphatic drainage, that’s a separate technique; to promote blood flow, it’s a different technique; to release tension, is a different technique; to work with the fascia is a different technique, it’s a different pressure. So, it varies and that’s why I have courses. I mean, not courses, I have a membership and I have workshops, because I want people to really learn how to do this properly, because there’s so many little things that you can do wrong and cause, actually, more harm than good; cause inflammation; cause sore throat; cause inflamed lymph nodes, so, you really do want to be mindful and gentle.

Like you were talking about, like “Oh, I realized that I have to go more gentle”, absolutely, when we’re working with lymph, it’s very superficial, it’s just underneath the skin so you don’t need to press hard to access the lymph. Gentle, slow, rhythmic motions, it’s when it’s going to get the lymph flowing. So, using the tool, out of 15, to almost flat against the skin and very gentle and slow. And again, it’s like that very sensual feeling, if you connect it to like the feminine energy, it’s a very slow, rhythmic energy, it’s not this hard, fast, you know “I need to get rid of it”, it’s like love and accept yourself. 

And I like to give those affirmations to myself when I’m doing it, and in my workshops too, it’s like “Do this with love, do this with intention”. Lymph, like, has its own archetype in itself and it’s just beautiful.

[15:04] Sahara

It’s so true, because we think, like, deeper tissue massage is better, like, deeper everything is better, and it’s just, it’s different, it has its own…exactly.

But I realized, for myself, what I actually need is a little bit of the lighter and just more of that lymphatic flow. So, I’ve learned so much, you know, even like the way that we put cream on our faces. Like, when you’re in your early 20s, you just kind of like put it on, then you learn “Okay, dab the eye cream and be gentle with yourself”.

[15:33] Liliana

Yeah, that’s what I love about these self-care practices, is that they do bring you back into that essence of being, like, gentle, being present, being intentional. And it also depends, everybody’s different, it depends on the person’s skin type, it depends on their concerns, it depends on their goals, it depends on their lifestyle, like, it just really is, it’s very tailored, very customized practice that you can use it for so many different things. 

[15:58] Sahara

So, a question that a lot of listeners had, and we’ve had many conversations about this, is, your thoughts on Botox and fillers. Because, every time I go on TikTok, I feel like I’m seeing it’s like “You’ve got to get preventative Botox” or like “Here’s a new way to use fillers”, or “Here’s these threads that you can do”, or “Here’s this and that”, and they target young people and they show you these before and afters of these celebrities and they’re like “You can look like Bella Hadid, here’s the work that she’s had, you can get that done too”. And we often just don’t know what are the chemicals that are in these Botox and fillers. 

And I, personally, never had either of them, and I don’t feel called to it, so I’m curious what your thoughts on it are?

[16:38] Liliana

Yes. I love this topic because I think that it’s so important for women to have the understanding and knowledge of what it’s doing to your body. 

And from my point of view, in the sense of being a facial reflexologist, doing Gua Sha for so many years, doing facial massages for so many years, I understand how the tissues work and I know what they need in order to thrive, right?

Like, if you go to a dentist, they don’t know what to do with your skin, they don’t know what’s healthy for your muscles, you go to somebody who’s going to inject Botox, they’re not really specialized in making your skin and muscles thrive, they’re like “How can we paralyze them?”, that is their goal, right? “How can we not cause the wrinkle fold?”, and that is their intention.

With me, my intention, my goal is for you to strengthen your muscles, I understand how it works.

So, when you’re injecting Botox into certain parts of your face, from my knowledge with facial reflexology, a lot of the points where they’re being injected is the female reproductive system, it’s around the upper lip area, the vagina, it resembles a vagina (in facial reflexology), it’s around the eyes (the fallopian tubes and the ovaries), and then we wonder why there’s so many hormonal imbalances happening, so much infertility happening. I mean, that can be a host of different things, but I feel like this is another add-on to the hormonal imbalance, like, pandemic that we’re seeing with women. 

[17:52] Sahara

Yeah, something that you shared with me is that when you do Botox, you’re paralyzing that muscle, so it stops moving. So, after, it weakens, right? Because it’s no longer strengthening with all of the facial expressions that you make every single day. So, what happens when that Botox wears off? That muscle has not been worked for so long, so it’s going to get weaker and that area is actually going to get droopier, so then you need more Botox and more Botox. That’s why the preventative Botoxing is a myth because the moment you start getting it, you can’t stop getting it.

[18:24] Liliana

Right! Correct! It’s like your building crutches for your muscles, and if you let go of those crutches, they’re not going to hold up. Eventually, they’re going to need more stronger crutches, that’s basically what you’re doing to the muscles. You’re also blocking the blood flow and lymph flow to the area. Any foreign toxin in the body, the body automatically wants to protect you, right? So, it creates this blockage and the body has to work harder now, at trying to get rid of a foreign object in your body, so it causes stress to the body, and stress causes ageing, as we all know. And so, I mean, there’s a lot of things that Botox does, that is not really healthy and beneficial for our body.

[19:00] Sahara

I mean, it’s called a neurotoxin, that’s the actual name of it.

[19:02] Liliana

Right. But again, to each their own, like, I can’t say “Oh, don’t do Botox”, because you know, everyone, at the end of the day, they’re going to do what’s best for them, just make an educated choice, that’s all it is. There are alternatives, that’s what I’m about, it’s like, just know that there are ways to promote collagen, elastin, hyaluronic acid, naturally, with facial reflexology and Gua Sha. There’s natural, holistic ways to age gracefully, to lift, to tone, without needing to put something in your body that’s going to cause so many imbalances like weakening up the muscles, blockage of the lymph and blood. So, it’s just, there’s other options, for sure.

[19:38] Sahara

What do you think of the face taping? 

[19:40] Liliana

So, face taping, I’m not, 100%, against it, but I just don’t, for me, it’s not a preference because I have very sensitive, reacting skin. So, anything that my skin, and then having to peel it off and on all that time, that peeling, it’s not beneficial for my skin type.

Some skins can tolerate it, you know, like really tough, thicker skin types. Maybe you have a more drier skin type than me?

[20:04] Sahara

I have dry skin and I bought one, and it was like the most popular one, and when took it off, it was like stuck on my skin, and I thought it’s maybe because my skin is dry. It was so stuck, it was like cardboard, and I was trying to do water and I ended up peeling off some of my skin to get it off. And even tried it one more time and I was like “This does not work for me”. 

I’ve heard they have silicone ones, so maybe I’ll try that at some point, but I don’t want to put my skin through such stress of just like removing some, really, sticky adhesive on it every day.

[20:34] Liliana

Yeah, that’s all it is, that’s why I’m not, pro, pro tape. I’m not against it, again, it’s not for everyone, just like facial Gua Sha, dermaplane or microneedling. You know, I’ve been in this industry for 15 years, so, everyone has different skin types, everybody has difference tolerances, different sensitivities, so, it just depends on your skin type really.

[20:53] Sahara

What do you think of face yoga? 

[20:55] Liliana

So, face yoga, if you are trained and very well trained, it’s great, but that’s the thing. It’s like, it’s very hard to learn some of these techniques, so that I found, even for myself. I took courses on face yoga, and even for someone like me, that sees and knows the facial muscles and can control her facial expressions more, due to facial Gua Sha, because I’m aware of my tension on my face, it was difficult to not cause wrinkles on the other areas of the face, because while you’re doing some of these exercises, you have to be very mindful, right, to not cause wrinkles on the other parts. Because what causes wrinkles is repetitive expression patterns.

[21:35] Sahara

Right.

[21:36] Liliana

So, if you’re always doing this, you’re going to do that wrinkle hole. So, if you’re doing face yoga and you’re doing this daily or weekly, you’re creating these facial expressions that you want to be mindful of not creating more wrinkles.

[21:48] Sahara

Right. What about these things that they bite on to make their jaw lines stronger?

[21:54] Liliana

Don’t do that.

[21:55] Sahara

Okay, I got a targeted YouTube Ad for that one, I’m like “Hmm…” I figured it was more for men who want a strong jaw line, but I’m like, I feel so many people already have such tight jaws.

[22:05] Liliana

But what is the intention behind that? Like, what would somebody want to…

[22:08] Sahara

It’s like for men who want to have a chiseled jaw, so they’re building the muscle by biting on this thing.

[22:14] Liliana

Yeah. To each their own, on that, you know. I mean, it’s like, who’s going to sit there and chew on something repetitively? Like, I’m not going to do that, I’m just not, like, it’s not natural for me to do that. It’s like, I look at more at how it’s going to benefit me on other areas, not just on a physical appearance. How it’s going to help my health, how it’s going to help my nervous system, and that’s why I brought in facial reflexology into my practice, because I knew that, I’m like “Okay, this is great, but let’s go a little deeper”. I really want to find out the root cause of acne, for example. I dealt with acne for 13 years and it wasn’t until I started facial reflexology that I started to heal my acne. Like, it was bad, I had acne all over my cheeks, all over my jaw, it was severe, it was inflamed cystic acne, but then that’s when I discovered that there was an imbalance or a blockage somewhere in my womb, in my sexual energy, that’s what brought me to. And so, that’s the beauty with facial reflexology, that it can take you on a journey of self-discovery and it can lead you to where the imbalance, where the blockage is coming from, and you can work on that.

[23:17] Sahara

So, let’s dive deeper into those realms. What did you discover was happening in your womb that was creating this cystic acne, or part of what was creating it?

[23:27] Liliana

So, there was definitely some sexual trauma that I was unaware it, like, I had blocked it, I had dissociated from that trauma, that’s what the body does, naturally, and I didn’t realize that I had a blockage there. And I didn’t realize what sexual energy is, I didn’t really know too much about it, I had a concept of my upbringing, that it was actually shameful, that it was a sin, that you’re dirty or you’re a whore, if you feel these, you know, excited energy or this excitement or this arousal, so I shunned it, I blocked it, I suppressed it. And so, with facial reflexology, it took me there and I went on a deep journey because I was like “Okay, it’s mostly the reproductive area where I’m breaking out, so it has to do with my reproductive system, my womb, right?” And when you are looking for answers, you’ll find them. And so, I went searching for answers and I found the course about the womb sciences and I was like, I was really drawn to it because, just, my body knew, like “You have to go here”, and I followed my intuition and I started healing my womb, I started reconnecting with this part of myself, my sensuality, my sexuality, and in a whole different way, in a sacred way, in way that was like “Oh, wait a second, this is not bad, this is actually healing energy, this is divine energy, this is my essence, this is part of who I am as a woman. Why have I been deprived of this?” So, when I had direct regulation and that reclamation of my sensuality, it was like a whole new world for me and my skin started to heal.

[24:56] Sahara

It really is just the most powerful energy. And sometimes, for me, in the state of an orgasm, I have these downloads of like, this is how the goddesses refueled themselves. You know, it’s like, this is our most primal lifeforce, it’s healing, it’s restoring our entire beings. And you know, sometimes I’ll have this, like, vision of like the sphynx in Egypt and how, like, upright they are and the energy, like, moving up through your chakras. And actually, I had a vision and it was coming from the earth, through your chakras, through the tops of the pyramids and that the goddesses would orgasm in the center of the pyramids to shoot that energy up into the cosmos. Yeah, like, I have full-on downloads around this. And it also it reminds me too, I’m like, this is who I really am, we are bliss.

[25:47] Liliana

We’re powerful too.

[25:48] Sahara

Yeah. 

[25:49] Liliana

We really are, truly that powerful and that divine. And I think that when a woman knows that and knows that about herself, she can use that for good, right? Because we’ve been taught that it’s bad, we can’t use it, don’t use it, shun it, it’s like too powerful or too bad, or whatever it is, like, we have this association with sex or sexuality that it really hinders our growth and healing and our evolution, I feel like, as women. 

[26:14] Sahara

One hundred percent, because the patriarchy is afraid of us and our power. It’s afraid of a woman who is open and in touch with herself and in touch with, also, the lifeforce that she has, and that ability to also be fierce and slay the demons in the world. 

And you know, when we tune into our feminine energy, we realize that our sensuality, but also our, like, fierce, wild, primal energy is one of the same.

[26:43] Liliana

Right, it’s sacred too. And our wildness is sacred, our primitive nature is sacred, and when we start to see that as a sacred part of ourselves, we don’t reject it, right, and we start to honor ourselves, we start to love ourselves and unconditionally love ourselves, that is what, really, I’m about. It’s like, loving ourselves unconditionally and loving all of ourselves, you know, not just parts that society is, uhm, how do I say this, that society accepts or society expects us to be, like ladylike, for example, right, always sitting properly, always acting nicely, always speaking nicely. It’s like, no, we also have moments where we’re not going to, we’re going to stand our ground, we’re going to say what we feel, we’re going to defend ourselves, right? 

But yeah, the sexual energy is also like this essence that a woman carries. And I also was like, curious about that, like, how is it that a woman carries herself, where does she get that power from, where does she get the confidence from, where does she get that ambition, that drive, right? And that comes from there as well.

[27:43] Sahara

So, can you tell us a little bit more about how someone that feels like, you know, maybe, my sexual energy, like “I have a vibrator that I use for like seven seconds and, like, then I feel guilty about and hide” or I meet a lot of people, they say “I don’t even orgasm from sex, I don’t orgasm with my partner so it makes me not want to have sex, I’m just doing it for him”. So, what advice do you have for someone that feels very disconnected from their sexuality?

[28:09] Liliana

I mean, definitely seek a therapist, for sure, that is one of the number one routes that I suggest. But then there’s practices that you can do, like, facial reflexology is one of the many ways that you can reconnect with that because you start to be present with that part of yourself, you start to send loving energy to that part of yourself, you start to really remember parts of you that you probably had forgotten, that you felt like “Oh, this is not important”. But when you give it the focus and the intention that it’s worthy of, right, it’s like, things start to shift. And I’m not saying that this is going to be the miracle tool or miracle practice, but this is one of the many tools that you can use in your self-healing journey.

[28:49] Sahara

I think it’s just creating that space too, because most of the time we’re so busy, we’re always on the go, we’re always reacting and responding, that we don’t take the time to light up some candles and take an hour, even, to just be with ourselves and breast massage, and touch our things, or you know, just caress ourselves and love ourselves, because we don’t do this, we’re like “I have, like, an urge, so let me just get it out of the way and then go on and do the next productive thing”. And it’s so important, because if we want to have a partner, that’s going to take us there, that we have this beautiful tantric love-making, how are we treating ourselves?

[29:29] Liliana

Exactly! Yeah, they can’t meet you at the level where you haven’t met yourself, really, truly. Like, if you don’t know what pleasure feels like, you know, that’s one thing I discovered, it’s like, I was cutting myself off from all pleasure, not just pleasure sexually, but pleasure in life, joy, and laughter, and happiness, because sexuality pleasure is this, like, pleasure in everything. You know, it’s not this only sexual energy to have sex, it’s like, to enjoy life, to breath in life, to feel life, to taste life, it’s everywhere. 

So, I realized that I was cutting myself off from so many things until I started to connect with this part of myself and recollect these forgotten pieces of me, it was when I started to really feel life and enjoy life, and dance again, and you know, take improv classes, and take dance classes, because I started to reconnect with these parts of myself, and noticing that “Oh my God, I can enjoy life! What?!” So, it’s really interesting.

[30:28] Sahara

I feel like we have these pleasure upper limits, like “I can experience pleasure up till this amount, and then I can’t”. It’s like, I’ll notice, sometimes I’ll eat chocolate, which I love, but I’ll like eat it so fast because it’s almost like “Okay, just get it, have it now”, and it’s like, instead, really sitting with it. Like, even having a strawberry and really tasting it, it’s like we can’t handle that much pleasure, but we’re trying to get there so we’re like “Let me just eat all the strawberries”, and kind of go into a strawberry trance, and you just like don’t even know what you just ate and your stomach hurts. And you know, it’s the same thing with sexuality, that we want to have it, but then once it’s there, we’re just like “Okay, get to the good part”, you know.

[31:07] Liliana

Yeah, get to the orgasm, get to it really quick.

[31:08] Sahara

Right, it’s like TikTok. Get to the dopamine hit, you know, keep scrolling! Yeah, exactly!

[31:15] Liliana

Yeah, we’re so used to this fast-paced life. I think too, the quick pill, quick fixes, that we don’t even appreciate, like the subtle, like, pleasures. Like, drinking water can be pleasurable, sitting in the sun can be pleasurable, anything can be pleasurable, swimming can be pleasurable. I like that you’re bringing this point to this conversation about, like, enjoying the subtle things and not looking for the goal, not cheat, or aiming for the goal, for the pleasure, like, just enjoying the journey of aiming for that, and not letting that be the ultimate goal, like the orgasm be the ultimate goal or eating the tall bar chocolate be the ultimate goal, but just the simple, like, subtle pleasure that you feel in that present moment.

[31:56] Sahara

So, how can we work on cultivating more sensuality in our lives so we can be that woman that, like, walks in the room and just has, like, a swing to her step and just some magnetism to her? How can we start cultivating that?

[32:09] Liliana

So, there’s many different practices that I started incorporating within myself, that helped me, different tools, right? So, like, dance is a huge one, taking dance classes, getting…

[32:19] Sahara

Shall we tell them what we did the other night? The YouTube videos? 

[32:25] Liliana

Oh God!

[32:26] Sahara

So, Liliana and my friend from India were over, and at first I was like “Liliana, check out my friend, she does Odyssey temple dancing”, it’s so beautiful, and we’re watching YouTube videos with these beautiful, like, goddess dances and we’re like “Wow, this is so sacred”, I’m like “Guys, let me show you some belly dancing”, like, some teachers I really love, we were watching the belly dancers and the veil dancers, and we were like “Let’s watch some twerk videos”, I’m like “Yeah, let’s watch some twerk videos”, and we end up on, like, lap dance to Chris Brown, you know. But it was beautiful because that same feminine energy was present in all of those dances, very, very subtle in the Odyssey temple dance where it’s just like, but the sensuality is there, it’s just like with her eyes and the way that she creates shapes and curvature in her hips, that like, especially in those times, thousands of years ago, like, that was like wow, it was so suggestive that even in many parts of India, they don’t want the daughters to learn Odyssey because it’s too sensual for them.

You know, same with belly dancing, like, that term, belly dancing, was not even the original term, it’s like what the colonizers called it, but the Middle Eastern dance floor were how women could connect with each other and they wouldn’t wear that costume they wear today, they just wore normal clothes and they would just dance. And that same energy continued on in Africa, it was more of the bounce and down low movements with lots of hips and gyration, which later on became the Nola bounce scene, which became the twerk movement, then floor dancing, chair dancing, which you do, all of these are like the feminine fully expressed. 

And I think why we hold so much judgment around it is like, because it’s been so distorted by the media, that the only time we’ve seen someone dance like that is someone dancing like that in like a rap video where they’re being disrespected. So, we think – because we were talking, we’re like, why do people think that belly dancing, even more so, is more respectful than twerking, you know? And we were saying it’s probably because in a lot of these music videos, they’ve only seen twerking done in this derogatory way.

[34:30] Liliana

Right, exactly. And in music where they’re talking only about ass, tits and pussy, and it’s very degrading to women, it’s very disrespectful to women, so that’s why I feel like some women don’t even feel comfortable expressing their femininity because it’s seen as, again “You’re a slut, you’re a whore”, it’s the same narrative of that you’re a whore and it’s like, no, you’re not, that is for your healing, that is for you. Yes, you can do it for your partner, in a sacred way, right? You can give that gift to your partner but that’s also a gift to yourself. And that’s what I learned in my own rituals, is like, this sexual energy in this sensuality and this orgasmic erotic innocence is also for my own healing, it’s not just for the men.

[35:16] Sahara

It’s so funny you said that, because I saw this funny skit and it was like every song in the 90s, and it’s like “She’s a slut, she’s a whore, and she doesn’t play no sports like I do, like I do”, it’s so true because it’s like, it was always, like, she’s bad and I’m good, so choose me, man. Like The Boy Is Mine, you know, “No, he’s mine”, “No, he’s mine”, and I was like 7 years old, singing along, and it’s like training you, you know, it’s like other women are your competition and if a woman is dancing suggestively, she’s a ho, is going to steal your man, so you better hate all girls that dance, in general, because, likely, they’re…

[35:57] Liliana

…going to seduce your man.   

[35:58] Sahara

Exactly! 

[35:59] Liliana

It’s the witch woman all over again, like, all over again. Like, it’s a sick narrative that I had to break through and I had to, like, really – it wasn’t easy, it wasn’t a pleasurable experience and it wasn’t overnight that I got to where I am now, and feeling confident with my sexuality, it took practice over, and over, and over again, 

Like, dance, it took me six weeks to learn the chair dance, like a proper chair dance routine. So, it takes time. Like, a lot of times, we feel like “Oh, I just need one practice”, the quick pill, right? But no, this takes practice and time.

[36:32] Sahara

Yeah, and I think that we’re so used to dance, beauty, all of these things, being for the man, being a performance, you know. Like, a lot of women would say “Oh, if it wasn’t for men, like, women would just wear sweatpants and get fat”, and it’s like, is that true? You know, because that means that the only reason why you value beauty is to attract someone else. 

And the shift happens, like, I get so inspired by these, like, older ladies who are like in their 80s and they’re wearing these amazing fashionable outfits, and it’s like, they’re not doing it for the male gaze, they’re not doing it for anyone’s approval, like, they’re sitting at home, wearing these outfits because it makes them happy, it’s how they express themselves. And I think we need to, each, go through our own stage, and maybe for some people, beauty is not really a virtue for them, and it doesn’t matter, but I know for myself, like, even if I’m just at home and I’ll put together a matching set of pajamas, instead of unmatching, like, or I’ll still have my hair done from the day before or something, like, I walk differently, I show up differently. And guess what, then I’m more likely to create content, which is my Dharma, and I’m more likely to show up because I’m giving myself that self-love that, again, I should love myself, and I do live myself, even when I’m in a messy bun and sweats, and just getting off a long flight, but you walk through the world differently.

[37:55] Liliana

Absolutely! And I like that you’re bringing this up because I always used to tell this to the women that I would do facials on, Cleopatra had it right. There’s something she knew in a woman feeling beautiful. It’s not for the male gaze, like you were saying, it’s not just for controlling a man, it’s for your own, for you to seduce, maybe a job interview, you can use that beauty to seduce, you know, an interview, somebody who’s interviewing you, or you can use this for your business, you can use it to attract more clients, you can use it to, but in a way that’s intentional, in a way that’s honorable, not using it to, because it has a double-edged sword, right? I mean, beauty can definitely destroy a nation, right? You can destroy someone, you can destroy a man by seducing him with your beauty and then saying no, get away. You know, I sure have done that in the past, like, I have used my beauty, again, as a weapon, right? But I learned to use it for my own healing and I used it for the well-being of others and how can this help my community, how can I seduce women into loving themselves more deeply, how can I seduce women into not using invasive procedures like Botox and facelifts and all these things, and use more alternative ways, how can I…?  

So, beauty can be used or you can seduce people with your beauty for the good.

[39:08] Sahara

Yeah. I saw this interesting Ted Talk on The Art of Seduction, and she spoke about Cuba and how in Cuba, like, seduction is a way of life, like, in their conversations, and it’s just like this flirtation with everyone because it almost gives people an ounce of possibility, you know, and they play with that a little bit. But you could also look at, you know, the shadow side of, you know, you used to live in Brazil and you were saying that a lot of times it’s the shadow of like, you know “I can take your man”, and they’re in that more toxic feminine energy. 

And the other side of that, and we see that all the time happening, in the media, of like, you see this beautiful celebrity but she’s like a horrible person and people using their beauty for money, for ruining families, like, we have seen that played in movies, and it happens all the time, you know. A lot of times, we’re the Regina George’s of the world, right? 

But then, there’s the other side, which I feel like no one talks about, and that’s women being afraid of their own beauty, because they’re afraid “If I’m beautiful, then I won’t be safe”, because, like, why? I used to work, specifically, coaching people with eating disorders, and often times, the people who had binge eating, we would go down to what it was and it was like “I feel, if I put on all this weight, then I’ll be safe”, because, likely, it was from sexual abuse when they were a child. So, it’s “If I have all this weight on my body, I have this protection, that people aren’t going to look at me that way anymore, I’ll be invisible, I won’t be attractive enough for someone to take advantage of me”.

And I remember, for myself, when I was in college, I would wear cute outfits and go to the club and all the things, and then when I was 21 years old, really going deep into my spiritual awakening and yoga, and what not, I, like, cut my hair and I would like only wear these very loose baggy clothing all the time because I thought beauty was vanity and to be beautiful meant you only care about the external and not the internal, but it was also a protection mechanism of “Then those people aren’t going to talk to me anymore because they’re going to think I’m a weird hippy”. 

So, I don’t know if you’ve ever had experiences on either of those sides, around hiding your beauty or using your beauty?

[41:17] Liliana

Absolutely, I would hide my beauty because I didn’t want to be seen. I was really tall, growing up, and I would be teased and bullied for my height. And so, I would hide my beauty, I would hide myself, which is really a part of you, it’s your essence, in Chinese medicine, like your yin, your sexual vitality, your essence. And not sexual vitality in a sexual, like, to have sex, it’s just like to have energy, your essence, how you carry yourself, how you breathe life, how you are walking in life, right. And I was afraid of that because I was like “I don’t want to be seen. If I’m seen, then I’m going to get bullied”, so I would walk around like this, I would walk around hiding my face, I didn’t want anybody to see me because I was “If they don’t see me…”, like, I didn’t really put it together until now, really. But yeah, like “If they don’t see me, then they won’t bully me”, so, for a long time, I did protect my beauty.

[42:05] Sahara

I remember when I started to, like, go through puberty and have, like, my boobs grow, and I was so ashamed of it, and embarrassed of it, that, like, especially around, like, my dad and my brother, because I never had that before and now I did, I was, like, becoming a woman so I would, like, when they would come around, I would pull my shirt away from me so, like, they wouldn’t see my, like, nipples. And it was this thing of like “Oh, now that I’m turning into a woman, like, is a relationship still going to be the same?”, you know, or like “Now, do I have to go do the girl things with the women”, which was like sit in the kitchen and talk and serve the men, you know. And it’s sad, because I see a lot of girls, when they go through puberty, they, often times, really disconnect. And often times too, like, they’re not taught what’s going on in their bodies, they’re ashamed of it, and they just look at the media and they think that being a woman is, whoever is on tv that day, rather than, we need initiations, you know, like rituals, like “Wow, you got your period”, like, all the women are gathering around you. 

So, you’ve created red tents and you feel called to bring together women of all ages, including young girls, because you have a daughter who’s 13. 

So, can you share a little bit more about this?

[43:18] Liliana

Yes, so, the red tent came about, also, just filling the void in my community, feeling, you know, I’m a single mother of a 13-year-old, I’ve been doing it on my own since, pretty much day one, and I notice a lack of support, the lack of the tribe. And I was like “Where is the tribe? Why is it not here?” 

Unfortunately, you know, I come from a background of a single mom as well, she also didn’t get mothered properly. So, it’s like a lineage of mothers that weren’t mothered. And I thought there was a need, that something was missing in my life and I didn’t want to carry that on to my daughter. I’m like “I don’t want to continue this pattern”, I know that it requires a tribe, it’s like, we hear it everywhere “It takes a village”, it truly does take a village. And when I found the red tent, it was when I was on this search of healing myself and I found something about the red tent and I was really called to it. And when I read about it, and what the benefits are, I was like “Why is this not in our communities? Why is this not present? Why wasn’t I introduced to this, growing up? Why wasn’t I initiated into a woman’s circle and honored for having my period, for becoming a woman, and what it is to become a woman?” 

So, that’s how it all started, just from seeing a need for myself, I was like “Just for my 13-year-old self, 14-year-old-self”, like how many women didn’t have this? And so, I want to provide a space for anybody, of any age, the minute they get their period, for them to come to a circle and be initiated, and be welcomed, and be honored, and be respected, and learn about sisterhood, learn about divine feminine wisdom, ancient women’s traditions and how to honor the feminine, because I feel like in our society, we don’t do that, we really don’t. It’s like, you have your period and you have to continue to put on this mask, continue to pretend like you’re all put together and like, you don’t go through phases, you always have to be this queen, this producer, this actor, this…, and it’s like, no, you also have your phases and your moments where you’re going to need to retreat.

So, one of the things that I love about the red tent, when I heard about one of the, my teacher told me, is, the number one way that indigenous cultures would destroy a village was by attacking the moon lodges, aka the red tents. So, her concept of it is, that’s the number one way to destroy a village – what’s the number one way to rebuild it? So, yeah, it’s been a beautiful journey, it’s been a year now, that I’ve been hosting these, in my private home, which is very close friends and relatives, and it’s been transformational, not just for myself, but for my daughter, you know, for her to be introduced to this, to see that “Hey, we’re all going through it, we’re all going through our phases, we’re not always going to be perfect, it’s okay to feel depressed”, you know, this word depression, in this age group, is very big, anxiety is very big. So, for her to see that “Oh my God, other women are also going through this, I’m not alone, I’m not the only one, I’m not crazy”, because that’s what it feels when you don’t have that, kind of, space where you can go and be your rawest, truest self, right? It’s like “I’m crazy, nobody is like me, everybody’s perfect”, and it’s like, no, we can be vulnerable, we can be real and we can also cry, we can also feel sad and we can also be triggered, and that’s natural.

[46:34] Sahara

Yeah! Throughout history, women have always gathered and shared stories and poetry, and you know, created art, even bled into the earth together, and that blood would fertilize the soil and create trees and flowers. 

And one of my teachers said that, when women stopped giving their blood to the earth, that is when war began, because the earth needed that blood. So, if we are not just, like, giving our blood out of like sheer plentyhood, because when we’re menstruating, there is perfuse stem cell rich blood that… You know, the same teacher of mine, she was living in Australia and she noticed that they were throwing away all the placenta after the babies were born, and she’s like “This is, like, so rich, it’s like Mana”, so she would collect – she called the hospital to give her all the placenta, this was like in the 80s, so I don’t know if they would still do this today, and she planted a bunch of fruit trees in the park, in front of the hospital, each with a placenta in it, and now, it’s like a fruit forest.

[47:40] Liliana

No way!

[47:40] Sahara

In Australia! In, I think it’s, I don’t know exactly where it is. Her name is Malaika Darville, she’s been on this Podcast numerous times and she’s just such a shamaness. And it just shows the power of the feminine, and we shove tampons, you know, in our bodies, which I did for so many years, because I was like “I don’t want my period to hold me back” or we take birth control to get ourselves to even stop having a period, which I also did, and you know, we disconnect, rather than noticing “Okay, what is my period telling me? Okay, my breasts are sore, what does that mean? I have cramps, what does that mean?” And it’s like, every single menstrual cycle, your symptoms are telling you how you treated your body that month. 

So, if you’re having a really tough menstrual cycle, how are you treating yourself? And if it’s a really easy one, what did you do that it became easier? And it’s like, we, for some reason, compartmentalize these things of like “My period is this random thing over here and my life is this other thing over there”, and it’s like, all so interconnected. 

[48:38] Liliana

Yeah, and it’s like, you’re saying, reconnecting with this part of yourself in a sacred way, in a way of honoring yourself as, like “This is also a part of me, this is not disconnected from me, this is who I am as a woman”, and we weren’t taught that, we were taught, hide your blood, hide your period, put it away, we don’t talk about it. Like, my mother didn’t talk about it with me, she didn’t explain to me what it is, like what is your period and what’s going to happen to you when you get your period, you’re going to get triggered, you’re going to get sensitive, you become more intuitive, naturally. Like, these are ancient wisdoms that weren’t really passed down. And that’s my goal, to pass down these ancient wisdoms and help women reconnect with these parts of themselves, in a sacred way, in a safe space as well. Because it’s like, it’s not just about gathering, but it’s gathering in a space where you feel safe enough to open, enough to be vulnerable and real.

[49:25] Sahara

And we need to create these spaces because, often, we don’t have it in our own families, you know, because our mothers and grandmothers, and even great-grandmothers’ generations, were not taught these things, you know. So, sometimes, you go to your grandmother and they don’t, they just tell you to take pharmaceutical medication because they’ve just grown up in that time where it was, often, moving towards that, whereas our generation is moving back to the ancient ways because we’ve realized “Oh wow, these medications have side effects”, you know, like “This baby powder had talk in it”, which is extremely toxic for the babies, it’s like, that generation didn’t know, they gave you formula milk and whatever else, they were just doing the best they could, from their point of consciousness. But I think that that intergenerational mentorship is so missing in our society that like, often, for me, even on this Podcast, I’m like, I would love to have elders on the Podcast, but it’s very hard to find them because, often, our elderly community was not fostered in this kind of way, and if they are, they’re not on social media, so I don’t know how to find them. So, if anyone knows some dope elders, hit me up, because I’m on the hunt to, like, bring them on and learn from them, because there is just such beauty in learning from people, different generations. 

And I think that’s the sad thing about what this modern school system has done to us, it’s like “I’m in 12th grade, so I can only talk to people in 12th grade”, “Oh, you’re in 11th grade, you’re a baby”, and it’s like separated us so much, by age, that it’s like “Oh, Millennials vs Gen-Z”, as if we’re like two opposing forces. It’s like, hello, there’s…

[51:02] Liliana

Let’s work together.

[51:03] Sahara

Exactly! And like, who decided, like, one year, they put a stake in the ground and now you have a different personality, like you’re this and you’re that, and it’s like more of this labeling and separation. And I just think it’s so important to – like, I remember, as a kid, I used to love sitting with my mom’s friends because I would learn so much.

[51:22] Liliana

Exactly, and that’s what the red tent is about. It’s like, the sacred women’s business or the secret woman’s business, when e would gather from all ages, passing down the wisdom. And that’s how we learn, we learn through the stories that they would tell us. And my grandmother would tell me stories, and my mother would tell me stories, and my aunts would tell me stories, and this is how we learn, through storytelling, like you were saying earlier. And that is one of my favorite things about the red tent, it’s like, all ages, and they all benefit each other, and it also gives space for elders to feel important, like “Oh, I still matter, I’m not just this old woman who is deteriorating and retiring, and that’s it, that’s all I have left”, like, no, you are important, we need your wisdom, we need that, you know, years of experience that you went through, when you collect, what can you pass down to us and go like “Hey, don’t go down this path, go down this path”, and that’s all it really is, it’s like, learning through other’s experiences as well. It’s beautiful.

[52:16] Sahara

From my Dharma Coaching Institute event that I just had a few weeks ago, I brought my grandmother and she talked to everyone, it was so beautiful to see and to give her the microphone, for her to feel heard, but also for the people in the audience. So many people said “My mother passed away recently and that was so healing for me”, or “I never had a relationship with my grandma”, and we just need to learn from other women and other walks of life.

[52:43] Liliana

And all ages.

[52:44] Sahara

And all ages. And another thing that I wanted to talk about is, creating more, just intentional time, even with friends. And I feel like, with you and I, like, we both are like this, that we’re like, instead of this, let’s just hang out, like, grab a cup of coffee and, like, you tell me everything going wrong in your life, and then I tell you everything going wrong in my life, and we just left that conversation feeling heavier. It’s like, even tonight, I’m like “Do you want to come over and do karaoke?”, you’re like “Yes”. So, it’s like, let’s sing together! We’re going to this improv class that, like, we probably wouldn’t be seeing each other every single week, but now we’re in this improv class, so it’s like, we get to play together, and even meet new people that we would’ve never met before, and learn about ourselves. or doing rituals and gatherings.

[53:28] Liliana

And I feel like we get to know each other on a different level vs. just sitting down over coffee, over dinner, over lunch, we’re not really getting to know each other. I’m getting to know you, how you eat, or I’m getting to know how you drink coffee, great, what is that? Not that what is it in for me, but it’s like, how is that enriching our lives, how is that making us better people, better mothers, better friends, better sisters, better whatever it is, how is that, like, enriching our lives? And I just find that, like, going through those journeys together and stumbling and falling, and seeing each other try, and seeing each other fail – like in improv, like, you’ve seen me fail, and you’ve seen me, also, succeed in improv, and it’s like “Wow, I’ve seen another aspect of Liliana that I didn’t see if I would’ve just sat down with her and had dinner”, for example.

And then I’m sure that inspired you, just like how you inspired me when I see you step up onto the stage and I’m like “Okay, she can do it, I can do it”, and it’s like, we empower each other through actually taking the risk of failing and taking the risk of trying, and not being perfect.

[54:26] Sahara

Totally! And I think it’s just a matter of initiating and finding these things, and also saying yes. Because it’s so easy to say “I don’t have time”, “I’m too busy”, whatever the excuse is, and then we’re like wondering why, “Why don’t I have friends that want to do cool things?”, “Why don’t I have interesting people?”

Like, you might be listening to this, like “I wish I had friends like Sahara and Liliana”, but it’s not like she made me like risk or I made her like risk, it’s like, we both chose within ourselves, like, we’re going to value play and creativity in our lives. So, at any moment that I’m going to see you or anyone else, I want to bring an element of that, of like, let’s, instead of just talking, let’s also paint while we talk and see what’s coming through that way. Like you were showing me your detailings that you do on snakes, so it’s like, also, I walked away spending time with a friend, but also, learning this new skill. And also, when your hands are busy, I feel like you connect on a deeper level, as well, than just like at a restaurant where there’s all these people around. Honestly, I hate sitting in restaurants because I feel like it’s like, okay, we’re just staring at each other and then it’s like, you’re like in this chair for a really long time, I’m like “I want to be able to stretch on the floor and, like, foam roll, and just like move around”. And I feel like we just need to be that person. I literally found you from the Gua Sha hashtag, so…

[55:42] Liliana

That’s awesome!

[55:43] Sahara

Yeah.

[55:45] Liliana

That’s amazing! And yeah, I think it’s beautiful that we can step into that place, step into that creativity and flow, and it’s enriching, it’s really beneficial for, I’m sure, your life as much as my life, like, we’re learning something new together, so we’re, like, holding each other’s hands, it’s like “We can do this!”, even if it’s risky, even if it’s uncertainty that we’re stepping into, this unknown, because improv is unknown for me, and for you as well, but it’s like we’re doing it together, we can do it!

[56:13] Sahara

Can we just take a moment to also just talk about how improv is the ultimate embodiment practice?

[56:18] Liliana

It really is because you can’t plan, you know, like a before show. So, every single level, you have a show at the end, and I was like “Okay, let me, like, rehearse”, and I’m like “Wait, there’s nothing I can rehearse because I have no idea what the word is going to be, I have no idea what the skit, I’ve no idea what just the…”, you’re just responding to the last sentence there, so you have to be so present, connected, aware, embodied, like, it is the ultimate practice of life.

[56:42] Liliana

Oh yes, I’ve learned so much through improv, it’s insane! Like, witnessing other – and also, like, I learned not to judge a book by its cover, that’s been a big lesson for me because there’s people who I would’ve been like “No, they’re going to be horrible at improv, in our class”, they’re all great, but it’s just like, some of them, you would think somebody who is going to be great at improv is extroverted and loud and excited and confident, and then they go on stage and they’re the complete opposite, right, or vice-versa. It’s like they’re super quiet sitting down until they get, you know, they go on stage and it’s like a whole different person, it’s like “Oh, wow, you had that in you this whole time?!”

I was just talking about it with this guy’s girlfriend…

[57:24] Sahara

Yeah, it’s scary because she’s an actress on Saved By The Bell.

[57:27] Liliana

Yeah, I was like, she’s like “Oh my God, I can’t believe this person had that in them!” I was at improv, when was it, Wednesday? And it was a new girl and she’s very quiet, introverted, to herself, you know, just conservative, seems like, when she got to the stage, it’s like this theater kid came out and like, theatrical person, it’s like who is this, I want to get to know her more, like, who, what other aspects of herself do I not know? So, it’s like, I’m also getting to know others and I’m getting to know myself.

[57:57] Sahara

Yeah. And you see that the characters that we naturally are drawn to are these archetypes within ourselves, right? And, like, trying on different archetypes and then noticing other people’s archetypes. Like, there’s this one kid in our class, Leo, and it’s always something really like dark, but hilarious. And he’s just a very awkward kid, like, if you saw him, like, he’s definitely, has social, but he’s so funny because he just, like, says the thing that no one else would, that it’s just like wow, and to the point.

[58:28] Liliana

Yes, and he’s being himself, really. It’s what it is, improv has taught me, it’s like, you can be yourself and that is enough. You know, that’s the thing that we learn at the first level, level one, like, be yourself, that is enough.

[58:40] Sahara

Yeah, because you try to, and we do this all the time too, but like, did this really sexual thing or swear or something, and it’s like, sometimes, it’s not even about being funny, it’s just about telling a story, you know, and really deepening your why of like “Why is this character angry? Why is this character excited? Why does this character like or dislike this person?”, and adding on to it.

I’ve noticed some of my go-to characters in this, it’s like my, and I like “Hey, like, I’m on OnlyFans”, like, my inner, like, ho girl, and then I have my abuelita, just like old lady, which, we did the whole abuelita skit together, and then I just have my strong, like “You will not fuck with me”, like “Do not mess with the Egyptian pyramids”, like, you know.

[59:27] Liliana

Kali energy all the way! And the man in their closets are “Oh shit, is she for real?”, because she’s like embodying it wholly.

[59:34] Sahara

Yes, which are such different spectrums from, like, maiden to crone, to fierce Kali energy, and those are all aspects of me, that I get to play out in these different characters.

[59:45] Liliana

Yes. Yeah, I never even thought about it that way until now, until we were, like, talking about it. Like, we get to play out all these different archetypes within ourselves.

[59:52] Sahara

Yeah.

[59:52] Liliana

Yeah, you know that empowered – I go for Russian because I feel that Russian…

[59:57] Sahara

She’s like a dominatrix.

[59:58] Liliana

They’re very dominant, they’re very, like, confident, they’re very “I control you, you don’t…”

[1:00:02] Sahara

Someone shot you, you’re like “I am bulletproof!”

[1:00:06] Liliana

Yeah, I was like, here’s the thing “I am bulletproof!” 

[1:00:08] Sahara

But it’s like that’s an energy in you that, like, you know, Swelt Russian queen.

[1:00:14] Liliana

And if I need to use her, I would.

[1:00:16] Sahara

And then you have the cult leader breathwork teacher who is like “Okay, close your eyes”.

[1:00:22] Liliana

And breathe.

[1:00:22] Sahara

Yeah. 

[1:00:23] Liliana

Just take a deep breath, like, I have all these parts of me in these, kind of, archetype cards that I use when I need it, right? It’s like, okay, this person just threw this at me in improv, right? And it’s like what do I do now, like, who is going to come through now, right?

[1:00:39] Sahara

Yes! And then, even sometimes, too, just trying an archetype that you normally would never do. Like, I tend to be more female archetypes, just when I feel more comfortable being in a female body in this lifetime, but I’m like “Let me be a stoner dude and see what that’s like”, and I’m like “Oh, that was kind of fun”, and then we were like teenage horny boys at church and I’m like, that was hilarious too. And it’s like, sometimes you just try new things on and it’s like, it might not be my new go-to, but you try on new sides of yourself and it really works different parts of your brain, which I think gets different neurotransmitters firing and it helps you, like, in life. You know, like on a podcast, like, I don’t know what I’m going to say next, I don’t know what you’re going to say next, but we’re here and we’re flowing, like, there’s no time that we’re like “No, stop, cut, like, say that again”, because we’re not in our heads, we’re not thinking about it, we’re just in the flow. And I feel like that’s what, not just improv, but like, public speaking, going on Instagram Live, content creation, you know, reels, podcasts, all of these things teach you how to be a channel.

[1:01:40] Liliana

Right! And how to be in flow and get out of your head, for sure. And improv has deepened that, for sure, like one hundred percent! Because these people are throwing things at you that you’re like “What do I do now? Like, what am I going to do?”, and it just prepares you for life. I think life is an improv, and that’s also what it’s made me realize, it’s like, life is improv. There’s situations that I’ve been in that I’m like, I don’t know how I’m going to get out of it, but I found a way and I improvised to get out of it.

[1:02:04] Sahara

And also, it’s taught me too, that it doesn’t even matter what’s happening in the scene, it doesn’t matter what’s happening in life, it’s how you feel about it.

[1:02:11] Liliana

Yes!

[1:02:11] Sahara

You know, like, the most interesting scenes – like, at first, when everyone starts improv, we’re all like “Okay, we’re, like, making this peanut butter sandwich, and now making it, oh, can you pass me the bread?”, and you’re just like acting out this thing, that’s not interesting for anyone to watch. But instead to be like “Mom, I told you not to make that peanut butter jelly sandwich! I can’t believe it! You don’t even understand me!”, and it’s like, okay, now we have a story, how is she going to respond, why is he reacting this way, what’s going to happen next?

[1:02:38] Liliana

Yes, and it’s also like making big assumptions, in improv, it’s like the opposite in our reality because we are not supposed to make big assumptions, but you can use that skill set of making big assumptions in your business, in your career, right? It’s like “I’m going to choose to do this and I don’t have any real reason as to how this is going to work, but I’m going to assume that it’s going to work”, I’m just going to make that assumption, that somehow, some way, it’s going to work.

[1:03:03] Sahara

And also, your range of emotions. 

[1:03:04] Liliana

Yes!

[1:03:05] Sahara

Because I feel like we’re like, typically so flat-lined in our society, because we’re like “Hey guys, like, sorry that I’m late on this Zoom call, like, I’m just going to share my screen. Oh, can you see my screen? Okay! Well, hopping off!”, it’s like, that’s most people’s interactions all day. You know, it’s like this corporate “Hi, I hope this email finds you well”, it’s like what the fuck are we actually saying here? It’s like gibberish talk of like, like it’s so funny, just like all of the jargon that we use, in the ways, that we mask ourselves, it’s like, in improv, it gives you that permission to play big, to like show what that anger really looks like, to show that turn on and lust looks like. And even me doing this right now, might make people feel uncomfortable because people are so uncomfortable with emotions and then it lets you “Oh, I can be sad”, “Oh, I can be joyful” within 90 seconds.

[1:03:59] Liliana

Yeah, it’s beautiful that your body can even do that, like, that is an art. Like, I discovered that acting is an art, like, I never really saw it that way until we’ve been doing improv and I see how we get into character.

[1:04:09] Sahara

New Dharma – actress! But the thing is, I don’t think I would like being a scripted actress, like how a lot of people have like “Okay, here’s your script and you have to memorize it”, you know, you add your own flare to it, whereas, for me, the sacredness of improv is that it’s completely you’re in this channeled state. 

And I’ve just noticed in life, that’s why I like podcasting more than I like a tv show because we can just flow and move with the energy, so, I’m curious – I mean, I know actors definitely experience flow state, but it’s a lot more, you have to have done mental energy first, and then you might say it and they’re like “Cut, Say it again, say it again”, twelve times, and I don’t think I would be able to show up the same way, if I had to repeat myself twelve times.

[1:04:53] Liliana

Yeah. I also like to be in the flow state. And it’s funny because I have a friend who is like – one of the things that she was mostly terrified of doing in performing arts school, was the improv portion. So, she was comfortable in the scripted portion and not comfortable in the improv. And I find that maybe is, maybe it’s uncommon or unfamiliar to be in this feminine flow. We’ve been trained…

[1:05:15] Sahara

Oh, improv is way scarier!

[1:05:17] Liliana

Yeah! It’s very unpredictable, it’s chaotic, yeah, it’s in the present.

[1:05:22] Sahara

You have nothing to work with, you have no props, no outfits, no direction.

[1:05:26] Liliana

No, you’re the director, actor…

[1:05:28] Sahara

Sometimes you even don’t know what’s happening in the scene and you’re just going within, you’re, like, trying to figure it out from their reaction.

[1:05:34] Liliana

Yup! You’re the writer, actor, the script, everything, you are managing that moment, in that moment, and nobody is managing it for you. So, yeah, it’s, it definitely, it’s very scary because of the unknown, right, and it’s very feminine, I feel like, more than masculine. You know that as I’m talking about it.

[1:05:50] Sahara

Right, it’s so feminine, yeah. And that’s, to me, what is so fun, because, in our lives, we’re always told what to do and get these points across, and we need to have that spontaneity, because that’s where God comes through, you know, it’s not when you’re so scripted, it’s when you open yourself up and surrender.

And that’s why ecstatic dance, for me, has been my ultimate spiritual practice. Not doing choreography, I don’t even go to a choreography class. For some people, they love it, I used to be on a dance team and all of that, but I’m like, I don’t need to practice more being in my mind, and perfecting it, and performing it, and getting judged, and did I point my toes enough, it’s about letting my body guide me.

[1:06:28] Liliana

Yeah. I like both. Like, I’ve learned to embody both, like, the class of setting, of having choreography, it is more like on the masculine and feminine, right, because you’re having both.

[1:06:38] Sahara

Once you perform it, then you can add your own flare and you can get into the flow, but then the learning of it, to me, I’m like “Oh, God!”

[1:06:45] Liliana

Yes, but once you get it, then you add your essence and then you just add your own touch to it.

[1:06:51] Sahara

Yeah. I like dance classes that are follow along, so it’s not like “Okay, here’s the choreo, now you go”, but it’s just like, you know, for example like a belly dance class that she’s just doing the moves and you’re following along with her, like Zumba classes and you have some form of guidance that you’re, like, doing something, that your mind is not wondering either, but it’s not “Oh my God, I need to, if I space out for 2 seconds, it’s going to be gone”, and that pressure. Although, choreography, it feels so rewarding once you have it and you perform it and you’re like “Yes!” and you share that video with everyone.

[1:07:21] Liliana

Yes, yes, absolutely, yeah.

[1:07:22] Sahara

Yeah, I mean, I think art is just the ultimate pathway to Source.

[1:07:27] Liliana

Yeah. When you’re in that flow, when you’re in that essence and allowing it to flow through you and feel it and present. That’s, like, what I love about improv, it’s teaching me more presence, to be in this moment, now. Don’t worry about what happened five minutes ago, don’t worry what’s going to happen five minutes from now, like, you have this line, this person gave to you, that’s it, and that is beautiful.

[1:07:49] Sahara

And that’s life too.

[1:07:51] Liliana

Yeah, and art. I think art is very in the moment. It’s like, if you, the most, like, I draw and paint, and the most artistic, beautiful paintings I’ve done are when I’m just in that flow and that moment, and I don’t plan it, it’s just beautiful things come through. 

[1:08:06] Sahara

Absolutely! 

[1:08:07] Liliana

Yeah.

[1:08:07] Sahara

Well, thank you so much for being on the Podcast today, for sharing your wisdom, for being in this portal with us. And where can people learn from you, check out your different Gua Sha videos, even come to one of your events that you have sometimes and just connect with you, join your membership?

[1:08:23] Liliana

Yah, absolutely. So, wildlilyorganics.com is my website, @wildwilyorganics is my Instagram, and then Wild Sacred Beauty is the membership where you can find on the website and on my IG as well.

Thank you so much for having me, Sahara.

[1:08:36] Sahara

Yay! Love you!

[1:08:37] Liliana

Thank you, love you!

[1:08:38] End of Interview

____________________________________________________________________ 

[1:08:39] Sahara

Let’s all take a deep breath together, allowing ourselves just to receive full joy, full beauty. Full creativity, bliss, connection, sisterhood, calling it all in right now.

[1:08:58] Sahara

So, if you’re interested in diving deeper with other sacred feminine queens, I invite you to join me in Rose Gold Goddesses where Liliana is a teacher, and so many others that you hear in this Podcast. 

We have over a thousand goddesses who are all here with similar soul vibrations, to walk the beauty pathway, and are here to support and connect with you. So, you head over to my show notes to join the wait-list for Rose Gold Goddesses, as well as check out my Divine Feminine Embodiment Course. You can also learn more about Liliana and get her beautiful facial reflexology tools. She will definitely be teaching again at the Rose Gold Goddess’ retreat that we have every single year here in Miami. And we’re just so excited to continue cultivating this beautiful sisterhood.

[1:09:43] Sahara

Also, if you love this Episode, I would love for you to leave a review and I will give you the free gift of my Womb Meditation. Now, this is a meditation where you can listen to your womb’s wisdom and hear her answers, which, often we’re going in life, looking for guidance, but it’s already within ourselves.

So, you can head over to the iTunes Store, leave a review for the Podcast, take a screenshot before submitting and email it over to me at [email protected] you can find that over in the show notes and I will email you back my Womb Meditation.

[1:10:16] Sahara

Thank you so much for tuning in, be sure to share this Episode, that anyone who could use an ounce of beauty, creativity, self-care and love in their lives, and I can’t wait to see you on the next one. Namaste!

Episode #474: Walking the beauty path, The Truth About Botox, Sacred Sensuality + Improv as an embodiment practice with Liliana Cruz
By Sahara Rose