Your purpose isn’t always going to related to your career. Often times, it’s related to experiencing what is in season in your current life, whether it’s a new baby, a family member in need or upcoming wedding. In this episode, I discuss the importance of allowing yourself to be human.
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Episode 196 – Why We Shouldn’t Forget to Be Human With Sahara Rose
By Sahara Rose
Namaste. My name is Sahara Rose and welcome back to the “Highest Self” podcast. A place where we discuss what makes you your soul’s highest evolvement.
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So many of us are trying to figure out what our purpose is, and what I realize more and more is that our purpose exists in seasons. You’re not always going to have the same purpose because life is going to require different parts of you at different stages. You know, a tree’s purpose is never to always be blossoming, or a flower’s is never fully in bloom. There’s transitions, there’s seasons, there’s periods of death, of winter, and there’s periods of spring, of rebirth, and there’s periods of flourishing summer and fall, which is preparing for the winter, and our lives, our dharmas are like this as well.
And I think oftentimes we try to push away what life is calling us to do at this moment because we are so fixated on what we’re supposed to be doing. What is that thing that would, you know, make the most career sense, make the most money, make the biggest impact. But sometimes life requires you to go off rail, and that is going to give you the exact experience that you need to do that thing in a bigger way. And sometimes it’s not for that either, sometimes it’s just because you’re a human and you’re meant to live life.
So right now I’m preparing for my wedding, it’s coming up in just two weeks, and you know, this wedding stuff is calling a lot of me—table arrangements, talking to the florist, all of the things. And that pitta part of me is like, “Okay, just try to get this stuff out of the way so you can focus on writing your next book. You can focus on the big thing.” But the other side, the more Shakti side is saying that, “Right now, this is your purpose. You know, your purpose is to be in this process of planning the wedding, and caring about the flowers, and the table arrangement, and tings that may seem mundane, or pointless in the grand scheme of things, but actually do matter to you.”
And maybe for you right now your purpose is to just fully show up as a mother. Or maybe your purpose is to be a caregiver for an elderly member of your family. Or maybe your purpose is to support a sibling in need, or whatever else shows up. But your purpose is not always going to be to be on fire, doing the biggest and the best, it’s going to require different parts of you, and sometimes you need to step away from that big dharma to take care of the little pieces of your life.
You know, like to sort through those cabinets in your life file cabinet that you haven’t looked through in a while. Like, “Oh, you know, there’s actually a lot there between me and my sister, or me and my dad, or me and whoever it is that I need to sort through.” And this has actually become a priority for me right now instead of whatever it is that you may want to do. And that is okay, you know, by pushing it away you’re in a way saying that the only thing that matters in my life is my productivity, and that is not true.
Your relationships matter, the details matter, you being a human and all that being a human entails matter. So yes, you have a large purpose, but also you have a lot of smaller purposes within that. And some seasons in your life are going to be focused on what may feel like a smaller purpose that is just as important. So go with it, go with what your heart tells you matters right now.
And maybe that’s being a stay-at-home mom, maybe that’s focusing more on planning your wedding, maybe that is spending the last couple months with your aging mother, or whoever it is that may be calling for your attention right now that isn’t the most profitable, or thing that makes sense on paper, but it’s what your heart is telling you to do.
Because you’re never going to get these moments back. You’re never going to have another wedding to plan—hopefully. Your kid’s never going to be a newborn again. Your mother’s not going to come back. And that sounds really dark and gruesome, but it’s the truth. And I think people’s biggest life regrets is not spending time with their loved ones when they had them. And not just when they were alive, but when they were in those experiences. You know, not spending enough time with your kids when they were still kids, not spending enough time with you and your partner before you grew so far apart and became strangers.
I don’t think anyone’s life regret is, “I didn’t work enough hours.” You never hear that. The biggest one was always, “Why didn’t I have more time for myself—for the people that I love? Why didn’t I say yes to all it is that I wanted to do in this life?” And I think in our society we’ve so implanted in our heads that anything we do has to somehow be related to something that we will monetize.
You know, you go to an art class, you’re instantly thinking, “How could I create a business out of this or whatever else.” I know I was always like that, too, but we’ve lost the sake of just doing things for the sake of doing them. You know, a lot of people say, “Oh, well my business is my art, I don’t need to actually go create art,” and that’s true, but it doesn’t replace the need to play, and to just create for the sake of creating. If all of your creations have an end goal, especially an end goal that is meant to be monetized, you’re not really creating anymore because you’re going to be stuck doing the certain thing that you know will get you a certain return.
You know, I now painters who are extremely successful and they’re literally creating and painting all day, and they still feel trapped. Because now people are demanding from them a specific type of artwork that they need to deliver upon, and this painter can no longer just splatter, and try new things, and get abstract. They are now wanted for this style of painting.
So don’t forget to play, don’t forget to do things that are totally unrelated to your business. Because in those other things is where the growth happens. That is where the real genius is built. But if all you’re doing is just that one single focused task that you’re doing day in and day out, yes, you’ll eventually achieve mastery of it, but then that mastery is going to stall at a certain point because you’re no longer utilizing the different aspects of yourself.
Right, if I was an actor, and all I did was just practice acting, practice acting, I didn’t leave my house, I didn’t interact with anyone, all I did was just practice my lines. Guess what? I would actually be a really shitty actor eventually because I’ll forgot what real humans are like. I’ll forget what’s the look of a mother when she sees her daughter in the wedding dress for the first time, or a couple when they’re holding hands awkwardly on that first date, or a colleague who’s rolling their eyes when their boss said something, and the other ones are giggling and forget those subtle moments. And the only way to remember is to keep living your life.
So if you want to be a rock star, you want to be a genius, you want to be the best in what you do, do other things. And this is something that I wish I knew earlier in my life, and I think a lot of us too because especially those of us who are hyper ambitious, super hard-working, throw ourselves in a task, then sometimes we come out of it and we’re like, “Yo, where was I? Where have I been? All I’ve been thinking about is this one thing that I’ve just let life slip by.”
So don’t forget to human. Don’t forget to have fun with grandma, to call your best friend and have a conversation not about venting, not about taking turns being each other’s therapist, but just talking. Not everything needs to have a personal growth emphasis attached to it. Not everything needs to have a business aspect or whatever it is that we adults throw on things to make them feel like they’re worthy of our time.
You know, I’m so sick of people going to events just to network. People meeting someone new and instantly thinking, “What could I get from this person?” People only leaving their house to get somewhere in their career, but have no intention for actual human connection. I’m so done with it because we lose sight of why we’re even doing this thing. You know, why do you even want your business to be so successful? Why do you want to impact this many people—a billion people? Why do we want to have these accolades, and awards, and achievements? And it always just comes down to love. So what if we just started with love? Loving ourselves, loving the people around us, taking every opportunity to embody that love. It’s not gonna take away from us achieving these beautiful successes, but it’s going to make it so much more heart-based.
So if you are one of those people—and I know I certainly was too—who had to attach meaning, growth, business success, career growth, whatever it is to the back of everything they did, just take that shit off. It’s heavy, it’s going to weigh you down, and there’s no purpose of it. Because everything that you need, everything that you’re seeking is already inside of you. So if you can just start with being enough, you no longer have to strive, you no longer have to try, you’re no longer chasing a goal, but rather you’re just embodying it.
Your goals happen naturally because you are just stepping up to who you are. Who you are in all areas of your life as a mother, as a daughter, as a friend, as a partner, as everything in between. So do the things that don’t fit on your resume, and make time to be a human. Because you don’t know how many more times you’re gonna be around on this planet, and you sure as hell will not want to miss this trip.
Thank you so much for listening. Right now I’m in Fiji on my honeymoon and sending you so much love from a deserted island, and I can’t wait to connect with you when I’m back. I hope you enjoyed this episode. If you loved it, I would love if you could leave me a review in the iTunes store. And as a free gift, I will share with you the first half of my unreleased book, “Eat Right For Your Mind Body Type.” Simply email a screenshot of your review over to [email protected]– again, [email protected]– and I will send you over the first half of my unreleased book, “Eat Right For Your Mind Body Type.” Thank you and Namaste.
Episode 196 – Why We Shouldn’t Forget to Be Human With Sahara Rose