We live in a world with a lot of instructions and information… and not a lot of embodiment. The truth to manifestation is you have to FEEL the way you want to live– thinking it in the mind is not enough. This episode is all about why having FUN is the most important #werk you can do. And expanding our definition of what FUN and WERK mean.
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Episode 255 – Why Having FUN Is The Most Important Werk You Can Do with Sahara Rose
By Sahara Rose
Namaste. It’s Sahara Rose and welcome back to the “Highest Self” podcast. A place where we discuss what makes you your soul’s highest evolvement.
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Oh my goddess, the vibe of 2020 that I am fully embodying and many of my friends are as well is the path of fun. So last year at the start of 2019 my word of the year was fun, and it was that word because I felt like I wasn’t having enough of it. You know, I’ve always been a fun person, I would say. I’ve always been like, you know, weird, and silly, and love to dance, but I wasn’t prioritizing that in my life as I spoke about in my “29 Lessons in 29 Years” episode that just came out a week ago.
I thought fun was just something that happens along the way. It’s not really a priority. Like you do what you were supposed to do and fun just happens. But as you get older, that is not necessarily the case, it’s kind of like sex sometimes—you gotta plan it, you gotta put it in your schedule as you get older. You know, these things that matter to you, you have to make them a priority, otherwise life just gets in the way.
So 2019 I made fun my priority, and oh my goddess, gracious, I did not know where it would have taken me. It was the most fun year ever. I mean I danced like multiple times a week, I had so many epic parties that I hosted for my friends, for my Rose Gold Goddesses, from last night’s birthday bash that I had, which was a sacral chakra themed party where I had like fake, you know, $100 bills everywhere, and a money gun, and I was… Essentially, my vision for it was we all came together, had a dance party, and then each performed a dance for each other that, you know, whatever your favorite song is or something that feels really sexy to you, or just silly and playful, whatever you feel like embodying, and being seen by other people and celebrated for you being the fullest expression of who you are.
So that was my vision of what I wanted, and you know, my friends are down, but I wasn’t sure if they would be down for that. So had them over, we were drinking ceremonial cacao, and we each said our intentions for the year, and we each did a dance move to embody our intentions, and it was just so soul nourishing, and we all just you know, got into that really heart-based level. And then from there, you know, turned on the tunes, and we were dancing, we did a soul train, we were doing different epic dance moves, we were twerking, we were listening to TroyBoy, which is really good if you love to twerk.
And then I offered up the idea of having us do a dance, perform it for everyone, they were like, “(gasps) Okay, yes, I’m down.” So we each did, and it was so much. Honestly, the most fun night of my life, like one of the most fun nights. And we were making it rain on each other, and just celebrating each other, an it was so healing because, for example, one of my friends had this really bad rash all over her body, and she felt really like ugly and not loveable and not sexy. And for her to just dance in front of all of us and be seen with her rash and we were like cheering her on, calling her a goddess and a queen, telling her how beautiful she is, it was so healing for her, and for all of us.
You know, I came from a background where women were needed to be taken seriously to get married, and you cannot be sexy, and that’s considered being a whore, and women are not to be trusted, and you know, just a traditional background, which a lot of us came from. I definitely was never, you know, exploring my sensuality or sexuality or playfulness at all. Growing up I was taught that there was something wrong with that. And to be in this place that I fully can, and the theme of the party of the sacral chakra, the reason why I chose that chakra, and it’s actually to me—especially right now where I am in my life, the most important chakra that I’m really activating—is because the sacral chakra, which is your second chakra.
So chakras are energy centers in our bodies that represent different psychosomatic emotions. So I’ve done episodes on all of the chakras, but just a little overview, the root chakra, which is on the bottom of your body, your perineum, your legs, it’s your grounding, it’s your anchor, it’s your stability, it’s your idea of feeling safe. Your sacral chakra, which is essentially where your womb is, right below your naval, that is the chakra of creativity abundance and pleasure. And this is why, to me, this chakra is extremely important to cultivate because when you look at our society, we see the duality that has been created.
For example, if you are considered a creative type, we tend to think of those people, you know, in a more judgmental sense as, you know, maybe they’re broke, or maybe they’re wishy washy, and they can’t be relied on. Like if you’re a creative, you’re not necessarily the boss or in charge, you’re just kind of the dreamer. We think of that often when we think of the word creative, whereas when we think about abundant, money, that frequency of currency, we think about you know, being hard and masculine, and like you’re very driven, and you know what you want, but it has this harsh feeling to it, like you’re not someone that’s loveable and playful. Like if we see someone who’s ambitious, who’s creating wealth in their life, we have this stigma attached to it. Like they must be greedy, they must be super hardworking and sacrifice having fun for that money. We create whatever story who you want around it.
And then when we think of pleasure, we think of someone who, you know, probably doesn’t have a lot going on for themselves. Maybe they are codependent, or we slut shame them, or you know, we don’t think of that pleasurable person as the empowered person. And this right there shows us where the patriarchy has essentially come in and caused us to forget our magic. Because creativity, abundance, and pleasure are actually all related to the exact same chakra. So they are related to the same energy center. Where you get your creativity from, your imagination, your ideas, your visionary sense is the sense place where you get your abundance from, your business ideas, and your currency and bringing that abundance energy code into your life, and that is the same place that you experience pleasure, and fun, and fluidity, and bliss.
So why have we separated these things? You’re either creative or broke, you’re abundant and harsh, or you’re pleasurable, you have nothing going on for yourself. Why did we create this idea when it is not based in the truth? And the answer is the patriarchy, which I’ve done podcasts about. So this chakra, to me, is the one that is often the most overlooked, and the one that really needs us to dive into it. Because the more fun that we have, the more pleasure we create in ourselves, the more we’re naturally going to have flowing out of us.
So for example, you know, this year has been my best year in terms of career. You know, I wrote my next book, “Discover Your Dharma,” I launched Rose Gold Goddesses, I spoke at Google, and mindbodygreen, and Institute for Integrative Nutrition, all of these incredible stages. I created so much content from two podcast episode a week, to two to three Instagram posts a day, to you know, all of these emails, and this, like a lot of content, and videos, and you know, master classes, and courses. And all of these content pieces flew out of me as well as I’m the person who’s running my business, like I don’t have like a manager or anyone doing this for me, it is me. I’m the one who’s literally sending the emails in the background, going into the website, like I do all of that still, and I actually enjoy doing it, and being a part of my business.
So one could look at me or create the story if I just told you about my output, one could create the story of, “Oh my God, she probably has no life. She probably doesn’t sleep. She probably, you know, is obsessed with working, and it’s all she ever does, and you know, I don’t want to be someone like that because to be that successful you have to sacrifice all these other areas of her life. She probably has a horrible relationship or doesn’t have a relationship, she has no friends, she probably doesn’t exercise, she probably doesn’t take care of herself.”
You know, we would create all of these ideas around someone who we saw was super successful in their career, and none of that is true. You know, I actually got married and was fully involved in my wedding process, and bachelorette, and this, and all of that. I also cultivated the deepest friendships, and had time to do that, and check in with them, and have phone calls, and meet up in person, and have goddess circles. I actually had the most play and the most fun, I went to the most fun events, and did all of that stuff. And this is because I was tapped into the sacral chakra.
For example, when I’m writing my books, I’m often standing up, and I’m dancing. My body is physically dancing, I am shaking, or I’m doing little figure eights with my hips, I’m just moving my body and letting it flow. And when I’m creating that energy in my body of fluidity, and play, and movement, and expansiveness, it is what I create in my life. You know, I’m literally always listening to music and always dancing, so I’m never feeling like, “Okay, now it’s time for me to do the hard work,” and I’m like separate from everything, and I’m struggling. Like the only time the music turns off is when I’m recording this podcast because y’all probably don’t want to hear dance hall music in the background.
So I’m always dancing, I make my body my priority. Every single day I exercise, I move whether it is through doing a yoga flow, or doing a YouTube complete like HIIT workout with weights, or barre, or dance. I make seeing my friends my priority. Every single weekend I’ll go to an event with a friend, or do something like visionboarding, or ceremonial cacao, or whatever it is. I make all of these things a priority because I know the more I fill up my cup and the more fun that I have, and for me that vibration of fun and dance and freedom is really important to me. The more of that I cultivate in my life I feel so soul nourished on a deep level that that allows me to create even more.
And I used to think, like most people, that I didn’t have time or that stuff. You know, I had a career I had to do, and I had to focus, and I had to get serious. And my output actually would have been more had I gone to that dance class, even when I felt like I had so much work. You know, for example, this summer though I had the craziest summer of my life from trying to find a place to move, to all the stress related to not finding it, to launching Rose Gold Goddesses and writing my book, and all of these things that were happening at once, I signed up for DJ school.
Which is totally unrelated—or at least from the outside—but every single time I would go to that class, even though I did not want to before, I was so busy, I would try to make excuses to myself to not go, but because I had paid for it and signed up, I would show up anyways and I would walk out of that class buzzing. Coming up with more ideas for my book, my business, my vision. Not from sitting around and on the computer stressing about it, but from actually completely removing myself from even thinking about the things that I was spending my whole day stressing about. Getting into that state of pure joy and bliss, which to me is music and dance, but to you it might be something else, and then coming back to it from that higher vibration.
So most of us, we are expecting you know, this huge change in our lives, especially in 2020, but we’re not actually changing how we live our daily lives. We’re not going to create, you know, epic magic and abundance and all of these things when we’re not creating that into our subtle vibration. And the way that we are vibrating, the way that we are resonating, and that means the thoughts you feel, the way that your body feels, the thoughts that are in your mind, all of these things create your reality.
And we can think about it from a spiritual perspective of, you know, the universe is responding back to you in whatever you feel you are a mirror to, and you co-create that with the universe. But even if you didn’t believe in that stuff, you were like, “Who’s the universe? How do they know what I’m thinking and doing?” Well, when you were thinking better thoughts, you know, let’s say for example, you had a really stressed out day at work, and your boss was so freaking annoying, and things kept going wrong, and you had so much work, and you messed up on a big project that you had been spending weeks on, you have to start all over again. Like you feel like crap, you know, you really don’t feel expansive at that moment. You come home, you’re so stressed out, and then a friend texts you, “I really need your advice right now. Could you hop on a call?”
What are you gonna do? You’re not even gonna respond. You’re gonna pretend you were sleeping or something. You know, the last thing that you have space for right now is someone else’s problems. So because of that, that friend didn’t receive that support that they needed. And they may have created the story that my friend doesn’t care about me, no one cares about me, and that could have made them go even more isolated. And you know, it creates issues in their life, which trickles on to everyone that they’re affected to, and related to, and it creates this domino effect.
Whereas let’s say you go to work, and you’re dancing the whole time, and I know maybe you work at a desk job, but you know, I think a lot of corporations are changing too, they’re having different speakers, and teachers, and HR representatives come in and think about a new way. I mean, I know for example, in my husband’s office they all work around one table together. So maybe, you know, you’re that person who gets a little silly and playful in the office, and you open people up to it. Or you’re listening to your music, and your headphones, and you’re just kind of like you know, doing dance moves in your chair, or you’re using a bouncy ball. You’re just getting into a higher vibrational state.
And because of that, whatever your boss says, it doesn’t affect you that much. And you realize that they’re just looking out for the business, and trying to do the best they can, and you actually find that really admirable. And then you come back, and your friend asks you, “Do you have a moment, you know, I could really use your support?” You’re like, “Of course. Sure,” and you hop on that call, and you help your friend so much, and that actually makes you feel really gratified, and uplifted. And then you make better choices at work the next day, which lead to you getting a raise, which lead to you becoming the C.E.O. of your company. You know, the domino effect is real, and it all starts with a momentary choice.
So I believe that fun is really the expression that we’re missing in society because we think of fun as something that is childish. You know, kids have fun, kids go to Chuck E. Cheese, or laser tag, or whatever the thing is that we label fun around. And then once you’re an adult, you get serious, and fun just doesn’t really happen, unless there is drinking and drugs related. And, you know, I always post my videos of dancing, and DJing, and people often comment like, “You know what? I think you’re really drunk.” And as I’ve shared on this podcast, why I don’t drink, I don’t drink at all. I actually stopped drinking around the time that I turned 21 years old, so it’s been eight years that I’ve not been a drinker.
And the last sip of alcohol I tried was, I think, four years ago at my cousin’s wedding. I tried a sip of champagne and I had the worst headache for the rest of the wedding that I was like, “This is just not on my vibration.” And the thing about alcohol is it lowers your vibration. So someone who is in touch with their heart, and in touch with the spirit of fun, and joy, and play, and bliss, when they drink alcohol, they actually feel lower than they originally did. Whereas someone who maybe is depressed or at a really, you know, just not in a conscious state. When they drink alcohol for the first time they might feel relaxed, or that their ego has dropped down, and they can say and do the things that they wish they could do, but they don’t have the strength to.
I mean all alcohol really does is give you permission to be the person that you want to be, but you don’t need toxins. I mean even the word alcohol it comes from the word algol, which comes rom a ghoul, like a dark spirit. And the reason why they call it spirits is because it is actually related to spirituality, spirits. In many ancient cultures, and even in Medieval Europe, they would share that when people were drinking alcohol, they were out of their bodies. And because of that, these darker spirits could come through and essentially go into their bodies and make them behave in ways that they normally wouldn’t have. That’s why when you someone who’s very drunk, and they get angry, and you look into their eyes, you don’t recognize them. At that moment, something else has taken over them, and these are these darker spirits, these ghouls that come forth.
And when we think about alcohol, what it actually does is it strips things. So, for example, if I put a vanilla pod in alcohol, I would be extracting the vanilla from the vanilla pod. Right? That’s how we create any kind of extract through alcohol. So when we’re putting it into our bodies, what is it doing? Essentially, on a spiritual level, it is extracting your soul from your body. It is making you detached from who you are. And so many of us hate who we are, and we might not recognize that, but we actually do. And because of that, when we’re detached from who we are, we feel more free, and more expansive because we didn’t want to be ourselves. And this is actually what alcoholism comes from, it comes from an addiction of not wanting to be yourself anymore. So when you drink, you can forget who you are.
So I go way deeper into all of the reasons why I don’t drink in the episode 175, “Why I Don’t Drink,” but I wanted to bring this part of the fun conversation because most of us think fun is related to drinking. And we live in a culture that celebrates wine nights with the girls, and cocktails on a weekend, and happy hours, and boozy brunches, and all of these things. And has told us that that is how adults have fun. I mean, we even say it’s like a fun drink, or this, like why is putting poison in your body our version of fun? Why have we steeped fun to such a low level that we have to feel drowsy, detached from our soul, unaware of our surroundings to have fun?
Like, no, the highest version of fun is to be completely anchored in who you are, embodying who you are, and expressing who you are. That is true fun. I mean do kids need to get drunk to like play on the playground? Then why do adults? You know, we feel so much guilt and shame around having fun that we don’t feel like we’re worthy of it. That’s really what it is, we don’t think that we’re worthy of having fun. We think there’s something else we ought to be doing. We ought to be working, we ought to be taking care of our responsibilities, we ought to be being a responsible adult.
But our soul wants to have fun so much. In fact, our soul is its truest self when it is having fun, when you are in a state of fun you are no longer attached to the ego, you are completely present in the moment. When you are having fun, are you ever thinking about the future or worrying about the past? When you are having fun you are at the most present state possible. All of your sense are heightened. You are feeling and tasting and touching and seeing and experiencing everything to a heightened level. And most of us are afraid of that, we don’t believe we’re worthy of it, we feel like we don’t have time for it, and then we push it away. But because our souls want it so much, we come up with ways to bring “fun” into our lives through drinking, through drugs, through whatever it is.
And I’m not saying that you can’t have a fun night drinking. I definitely, when I was a freshman in college, would drink all the time and that was my version of time. But that was because I didn’t know myself or love myself enough to really explore other options of fun. I didn’t know that I could just have a dance party with my friends and not have alcohol involved. I didn’t know that there were outlets like ecstatic dance, and all of these beautiful, sober dance and party experiences. You know, for example, daybreaker and all of these other 7:00 AM dance parties that are taking place all around the world to allow you to have a dance party before you go to work. Like I didn’t even know these things existed back then.
I thought, you know, having fun was getting fucked up, and forgetting what you did the next day, and being hung over at brunch, and talking about how you didn’t know what happened. And the person who was the drunkest that night clearly had the most fun. And the person who made the worst mistakes, but not too bad, but just you know, things you actually really wanted to do when you were sober, but being drunk just allowed you to create an excuse around it. The person who did the most are those, and we could all laugh about it, that person had the most fun.
That is the opposite of fun. You know, being so afraid of who you are, being in such a shell, that is not fun, that is being in imprisoned. Fun is something you don’t want to run away from. Fun is something that you choose soberly and fully want to soak in every moment of it. There’s no addiction or dependence in fun. When you’re having fun you’re not like, “Oh, I need another drink or I need another hit or I need another pill,” or whatever it is outside of you. It is all in you.
And I want to share that there are different versions of fun. Again, when we think of fun, because fun is almost like a foreign word in our vocabulary. We haven’t full even dived into what that word means, so most of us have a very shallow sense. We think fun, okay, rollercoasters, going to a club, like music festival, like we have these grandiose views of fun, we think fun is this like really huge deliberate thing that you must plan for and go to a place to do around other people that you’re all agreeing like this is a fun thing, like an amusement park, this is fun. Even though some people might be at an amusement park, I’d say most people at the amusement park are not actually having fun, you’re waiting in line. But we’ve decided as a society, okay, this is fun place, Disneyland, fun.
So yeah, that is one version of fun. Being on a rollercoaster is one version of fun, but there are so many other spectrums of fun. I’m having fun right now. I don’t know about you, I’m having a lot of fun right now, and I’m not jumping, I’m not ecstatic in this moment in a physical sense. But I’m having fun because I’m in pure enjoyment, I’m in pure presence, and I’m really enjoying channeling this message for you. And maybe you’re having fun listening because it’s touching something deep into your soul, and you feel like you’re in alignment, and you’re fully present too.
Maybe fun is laughing with your friends where one person says something, and it just keeps getting funnier and funnier, and at this point you’re just laughing cause you don’t even know what you’re laughing about, and you can’t even speak because the moment you start speaking you start laughing again. And it just you’re laughing at the other person’s laugh, and that is also a lot of fun. What else is fun is, you know, painting, and getting really creative, and artsy, and looking at the different colors, and how they blend together. That might be your true sense of fun. Fun could be sitting in a circle of people and just jamming out, singing, you know and one person is doing different octaves, and someone else is coming in with this cool funny voice, and you’re just like completely immersed in vocal alchemy.
So there are so many spectrums of fun. From subtle fun, to you know, something that is work related. You can have fun doing your work. I have a lot of fun doing my work. In fact, writing my books, creating all this content, is super fun. Or you could be having fun such as in ecstatic dance, where you literally physically are in this high vibrational setting that you actually can’t be thinking about anything else because you’re so all in it.
You could be having fun decorating your house, or coming up with ideas, or writing poetry, or with your pet playing, or you know, looking at your child’s cute faces. There’s so many spectrums of fun. So I think it’s important that we expand our definition of what fun means, as well as come to a clear understanding of what fun looks like for us. Because what fun looks like for one person, one person’s ideal birthday, ideal wedding, ideal whatever is going to look really differently for someone else’s.
And when we have an idea of, you know, various spectrums of fun for us, we’re able to create that experience. So I’ll speak about birthdays specifically, because that’s kind of a celebrated day where you’re supposed to have fun, but most people don’t know what to do, they don’t know what is fun, and they feel guilty about wanting it, therefore they feel guilty about asking other people for it because they assume that those other people are too busy for it. Anyone else?
So I think birthdays are one of the most awkward, and often disappointing and sad days on people’s years. Because, you know, we all want to have an epic magical birthday, but oftentimes we feel too guilty, or that we’re going to come off as egotistical to plan something. Like what adult plans themselves a birthday party, right? That would make you totally weird. So we don’t do anything, we don’t plan anything, we’re weirdly secretive about it, even though we’re secretly wanting someone to throw this like surprise party of our dreams, but we haven’t expressed that to anyone, and we in fact pretend we don’t even care about our birthday, so no one would even know that we want this.
And then when our birthday comes around, we haven’t told anyone about it, we haven’t shared about it, so no one’s texting us, no one’s calling us, people are just like talking to us like any other day. And we feel weird bringing it up, but we’re secretly resenting them because we’re like hello? Have they not checked Facebook? Did they not see it’s my birthday today? And then go on to create this story that no one cares about you, that you know, ever since you were a kid no one’s even remembered your birthday, your mom doesn’t even remember your birthday, and you might as well not celebrate yourself because no one is celebrating you.
So then we create this longstanding story that I am not deserving of being celebrated. I don’t deserve my birthday, or anything in my life to be celebrated, because I’m unworthy of it all. Anyone else? I think all of us have had some level of birthday trauma. You know, I remember when I was like 19 I planned this big birthday, and I actually, I’ve always planned myself birthdays because I’ve always known that I would be disappointed if nothing happens, so I’ve always taken the initiative myself. But I remember one year when I was turning 19, which is ten years ago now, that I planned this big birthday for everyone to meet me at this lounge, and no one showed up, it was just me, and my roommates.
And I ended up having the best time ever with them because it was just the three of us, and we were talking about our dreams, and our goals, and our aspirations, and all of these things that we ended up having the most fun night ever despite the birthday party not being there. And it also showed me who my true friends were too. So since then, you know, I’ve always made it deliberate of if I want a birthday, I will initiate it. And the people who want to celebrate with me will come and celebrate with me.
So I’ve gone through years of my life where I didn’t really have that many friends, that my birthday celebration was with a couple people who I just met, or was just with my now husband and it was just us celebrating. But I’ve always realized that people want you to have a happy birthday, they just don’t know how. So you have to be the person to show people how. It’s just like a relationship or sex, you have to show people what you want, you can’t assume someone’s going to read your mind.
So this year, I got really clear of my version of fun, and that was dancing, that was music, that was sensuality, that was abundance. And because that was my version of fun, I stepped up and created that experience of what my dream of us performing for each other and making it rain with the money gun. It’s like, you know, kind of crazy, out there vision that I had never even talked to other people about, but I invited them to be a part of it, told them to wear something sexy, and they all came, and they all showed up. And even today, they’re all texting me saying, “That was the most fun night of my life. I am buzzing today. I am creating so much because that brought me to such a high vibrational state.”
So, so many of us are depriving ourselves and others from fun, high vibrational experiences because we don’t feel worthy of it. And feeling worthy of it just comes from choosing yourself. Do you believe that you were worthy of having fun? Do you believe that a certain amount of work and sacrifice has to be done before you have fun? Or do you believe that having fun is how you get the work done? Having fun is how you operate, and create, and manifest. What I you made it your new story the more fun I have, the more money I make, and the more I create. Put that on a t-shirt.
I let that be my story, and it has proved to be truer than I could have ever imagined. And we’re living in a really interesting time, and I was actually just speaking to this about my friend last night. She’s like, “What do you think is happening right now that we’re officially in the Aquarian age?” And, you know, the past thousand-plus years we’ve been in this more masculine focused, patriarchal era that was very structural, building things, hierarchy, money, in terms of material wealth. Which came with the greed, which came with the power hungriness of that shadow aspect.
But now with the Aquarian, which is bringing in more of the air energy, and more of the feminine energy, what I see happening is more of a you choose your own adventure. I really believe that at this point, we are experiencing a big shift. We are experiencing the people who are choosing to operate from a state of joy, who are choosing that they have full control over their lives, and they are also being guided by the universe, and life was meant to be enjoyed, and they can live the life of their dreams. In fact, the reason why it is the life of their dreams is because this life is dreaming them back. And all they have to do is say yes, and find the courage enough to unravel all of the stories and limiting beliefs and falsities that they have been holding onto that are suppressing them from being the person that they were meant to radiate as in this lifetime.
Or you can choose the story that the earth is real fucked up. And there’s more war, and more scarcity, and more poverty and destruction than ever before, and it’s too much for us to deal with. It’s gotten so bad that we need to just completely stop having kids, stop having fun, we all need to be freaking out right now because it’s gotten so bad, and there’s destruction happening on every corner, and I’m really afraid for everything. And I don’t want to leave my house because there’s shootings happening everywhere, and you know, there’s probably gonna be someone that’s gonna drop a nuclear bomb really soon. And the tidal waves are coming for me, and the tsunami, and the hurricane, and the fires, what if there’s a fire near me? And oh my god, what is happening? The earth is just being destroyed, and everyone is so mean, and so hateful, and people are so disconnected from their truth, and the internet is such an evil and dark place. And people have so much hate in their hearts, and oh my god, nothing is safe, true love doesn’t exist. The world has come to shit, I can’t believe I incarnated at this time.
Sound familiar? So what side are you choosing? Because that side, that secondary side, that frantic voice is predominant in our society. You will hear many a people telling you how right now is the worst time in society—violence is the worst, poverty is the worst, chaos is the worst—all of these things are at an all-time crisis level. And that is true, that is true on a dimension. And we are also at the best place that we have ever been. Any human right now, essentially, can have access to the internet and have the same education as a Harvard graduate.
We are ending many diseases that would have caused people to die, lifespans are longer, and healthier than ever before. People are coming together, you know, from the happy dance, to supporting each other in their revolutions in ways that they never have before. We are rising in consciousness and modalities like breath work, and Ayurveda, and sound baths are at an all-time high. People are awakening to their inner potential, their inner goddess, their highest selves. Yoga is practiced by almost every American and meditation is a mainstream popular word. The world has had better place than it ever has been before, and it’s just getting better.
Which reality do you want to choose as your own? They both exist, so I’m not telling you have fun and forget about what’s happening on this planet. But I’m asking you to be of service through joy. The world does not need anymore wounded healers who are so busy trying to save the world that they are hurting themselves. I know I used to be one. I used to think that the only way that I could help others is by sacrificing my own life. You know, from the time I was a kid, I was like this whole lifetime is gonna be about helping others, I know it, I could feel it. From the time I was a child I was obsessed with studying about Gandhi, and Mother Teresa, and reading books by Howard Zinn, and how we can have revolution, and this was literally who I was my whole life.
So when I was a kid I thought, “Okay, Mother Teresa’s helping others, and she’s a nun, so I’m gonna go become a nun. I literally used to dress up like a nun. Gandhi’s helping the world, and he went on a hunger strike, and you know, essentially died for the cause, so I’ll do that. Okay, the Congo needs human shields right now, so I will stand in front of villages and use my American passport to prevent this village from being bulldozed. I might get bulldozed too, but you know what? At least I could be able to help a village, so I’ll go do that. Okay, the Peace Corps, I mean I’ll be gone for two and a half years, I don’t know where I’m gonna be going, they’re gonna send me somewhere random, I probably won’t be in touch with anyone in my family for a while, but that’s how you help others, so I’ll go do that. Okay, international human rights lawyer. That’s the optimal way to help the most number of people. You know, I really don’t like law or corporate stuff, but that’s how I help the most number of people, so I’ll go do that.”
My whole life was based on how do I help people? Okay, I’ll step into that without even asking if it’s in alignment with my desires. That was too selfish for me. That made me a bad person. That made me part of the problem. There’s a world out there suffering, and I needed to be the one to go fix it. Anyone else feel like that?
And what I’ve realized now is I’m actually helping more people than I ever could have done with any of those different routes that I could have taken. And for some people, that is their truth. Some people, their truth is to become an un, or join the Peace Corps, or become an international human rights lawyer, but it wasn’t mine. And me, by being me, by doing this podcast, by writing my books, by creating Rose Gold Goddesses, and speaking, able to help millions of people, which I never would have assumed before, and I have the most fun possible, I live my most fun life. I could have never had this amount of fun doing anything else, including become a back-up dancer, or you know, belly dancer, whatever else that sometimes I’m like, “That would be so cool,” but that actually wouldn’t have been as much fun for me because I wouldn’t be using all of my gifts.
So I share this with you because it’s not save the world or have fun, it’s both. In fact, they need to be together, you need to be in joy to be of service. Because otherwise, you join the ranks of the wounded healers, who are hurt, who are suffering, who are angry. They are so angry at the world because they’ve given all of their energy on trying to help others and no one is helping them. They are giving with resentment. Maybe you had your mom or someone, you know, make you dinner but you could tell she really didn’t want to? She was like angry, and huffing and puffing, and feeling like she was being taken for granted, but she still made you dinner. That doesn’t taste very good.
We don’t want someone giving from us out of a sense of need. We want someone giving from us out of a true sense of desire. I don’t need to, but I want to. It fuels me up to feed you. The best meals that you have are going to be cooked by someone who poured their love into making it for you. We don’t need anymore wounded healers giving from their empty cups. We don’t need anymore wounded healers trying to breathe because they were so busy putting on other people’s oxygen masks that they didn’t put on their own. We don’t need anymore wounded healers whose wounds are pussing with pain, but they won’t pay attention to their own, because they want to focus on yours.
We need people taking care of themselves first because if we all made it our priority to take care of ourselves first, we’re actually not going to need as many healers. The reason why we need so many healers right now is because no one is putting themselves first. No one is properly giving themselves the nourishment, and the fun, and the pleasure, and the joy that they need, that is in their prescription. So because of that, they’re stressed, and they’re burnt out, and they’re angry, and that’s why you see people who are even millionaires going to functional medicine doctors saying, “My adrenal fatigue is through the roof.” Because they haven’t asked themself what do I need? What does fun look like to me? What would my ideal life look like—not just bank account.
And when you ask yourselves those questions, and you make the answers your priority, you’re not gonna need as many things from the outside world. You’re not gonna need as many sessions with a therapist, or drinks of margarita, or whatever your medicine is. You’re not going to need that because you’d have prevented the problem from starting in the first place. We need more empowered healers. We need more healers having fun. We need more people on the frontline filled with joy so the people that they heal can see what an example of a healer looks like.
Having healers who are burnt out, and stressed out, which is why I have such a problem with the way that the medical system is requiring doctors, and nurses, and medical professionals to show up, preventing them from giving themselves the healing that they need. We don’t need anymore burnt out doctors smoking cigarettes outside of the hospital because they can’t cope with the stress and anxiety of their day. We need more doctors, more teachers. Oh god, the teachers, I have such a problem with how little they are being paid when they are the most important people in our society. We need more people like that glowing from within, because then when you heal others, you teach them too what they are capable of.
And every time I share on my Instagram, whether it is my sacral chakra birthday party, or the leopard themed birthday party I threw for myself, the Capricorn bash—I threw myself two birthdays, guys. One for, you know, a lot of my friends, and one small one for a couple of my friends. Two, and most people won’t even throw themselves one in a lifetime. And the more I show that, the more I receive beautiful messages from you saying, “Thank you so much for celebrating yourself. It has inspired me to celebrate myself too.” And I think if we had more people celebrating their uniqueness, their strengths, their gifts, their medicine, their laughter, if we had more people celebrating that, we would have so much more to celebrate in this world. We create when we are filled with joy, and we receive back when we radiate that joy.
So if you’re stressed about not having money, try being happy and seeing how the money comes through. But if you’re feeling burnt out because all you’re doing is helping other people, trying helping yourself, and watch how the people around you who may depend on you right now start helping themselves too. We need more people having fun, guys, this is my PSA, and it couldn’t be a more important one. So I want you to think about what fun looks like to you. Is it having your friends together singing songs, drawing, visionboarding, praying, meditating? Is it you alone in nature in a cabin, on a beach, on a mountain? Is it you with animals—wild animals, goats, sheeps, horses? Is it you gardening, building, painting—what does it look like for you and how can you start creating that today?
This is the most important work you can do, and best of all, it’s a hell of a lot of fun. So, if you’re calling in more fun in your life, more spirituality, more growth, more embodiment of your highest self, then I invite you to join Rose Gold Goddesses, my sacred sisterhood collective all about honoring the goddess within. Consider it your spiritual gym membership from content, to community, to my master classes workshops, live videos, events, so much more, all with one very low monthly cost, because I believe everyone should have access to this material. You can learn more and sign up at rosegoldgoddesses.com. That is rosegoldgoddesses—plural–.com and I am soul excited to celebrate with you in there. Namaste.
Episode 255 – Why Having FUN Is The Most Important Werk You Can Do